Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

What does childbirth feel like??? Please tell me all about contractions, the actually pushing out of the baby, the 'Cut'...I have gotten so much advice and i am fine with having kids, but the thing that PETRIFIES me is the actually giving birth. I TiVo a baby story and that is not helping me...you have women giving birth in rocking chairs, who want no pain medication......can i get honest opinions of woman who have been there.

And I would like to hear from woman who are on their second or third....are you more nervous then your first, are you less nervous then your first, are you nervous in general because you know what the pain is going to be like...

PLEASE enlighten us who are going to be TTC and those that are TTC or are pregnant with thier first one.....
Thanks....

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

My water broke initially and I didn't know what was happening at first, I thought I was just peeing myself. I was embarrassed because it kept happening for like 15 minutes or so, little trickles of fluid. Finally I was like 'Umm something has to be going on'. Upon entering the hospital, they confirmed it was amniotic flud and put me on IV. There was never a huge gush - just uncontrollable leaking throughout the night (talk about messy, sticky and uncomfortable). They started pitocin the next morning because I wasn't contracting and the contractions came on very quick and hard. It felt like the worst period pain you've ever had X 2. I didn't take lamaze but honestly I don't think it would have helped (did watch alot of videos on it and knew breathing techniques, etc.) because it's easy to lose focus and I started panicking because I didn't have 'control' over what was happening to me. I'm not down with the whole medical thing to begin with (IV's, needles and such) and I was so tired. I just remember the pain was getting increasingly worse and I was begging for something (I was so against the epidural). Anyway, the technician screwed up the first epidural and they only numbed my legs, not the important parts. I was screaming at this point because I was beyond exhausted, getting the shakes (I have hypoglycemia and I needed COKE badly) and now I couldn't feel my legs but EVERY other part of me was 100% in total hightened sensitivity. They brought in another technician who got it right on the first try (I actually grabbed his arm and called him my savior because I was near hallucinating). In between epidurals, they were pumping me up with some other crap and I started to fade out of it completely. I slept for four hours and they had to slap oxygen over my face because my heartrate started going down. The doctor came in about four hours later and asked me if I wanted to push. Without even opening my eyes, I was like 'Let's do this!!'. I was so done and just wanted her out!! When I started pushing, everything came back to me in terms of senses (meanwhile I was 10 cm and didn't feel anything UNTIL I started pushing). I couldn't feel my legs at all and that made getting me into position very difficult because now I was panicking they paralyzed me. I was pinching my skin as hard as I could and felt NOTHING!! When you start pushing, you aren't pushing per say with the obvious, it's more like taking the biggest poop you could ever imagine. What a humbling experience because it's all out there and everyone can see you doing your thing all over the table. I pushed for about an hour and it's very hard not to 'push' per say with your face (like that's going to help you to puff up your cheecks). When she came out it was like a burning sensation I could never accurately describe, sort of like a flash fire on my cooch. The contractions don't really subside (or at least in my case they didn't) until EVERYTHING is out. All I wanted was someone to clean me up, some coke, coke and more coke and a hamburger (they don't feed you during labor and I was in it just over 24 hours). Again, more humbling moments when the nurse has to clean you up and pack you with ice. Then they have to 'verify' everything is working correctly. But I felt AWESOME after a few hours sleep, something to eat and of course my coke I was dragging my bag down the hall of maternity at 3:30 in the morning because I wanted a shower!! The nurses thought I was crazy

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

I'm so glad you asked this question. I too am petrified of the actual birth process. I am not afraid of pregnancy and labor - it's the pushing and epi I'm scared of!

I can't wait to see some of these answers.

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

I really don't think that you would want to know!! Everyones experience is different - some people have good some have horrible - the horrible ones will scare the c r a p out of you. Maybe in this case its better to not know the details of someone elses childbirth!
I know mine was NOT good - but I would not want to scare you so I won't go into details.

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

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Posted by brideinapril

I really don't think that you would want to know!! Everyones experience is different - some people have good some have horrible - the horrible ones will scare the c r a p out of you. Maybe in this case its better to not know the details of someone elses childbirth!
I know mine was NOT good - but I would not want to scare you so I won't go into details.

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Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

My delivery was GREAT - and I can't wait to do it again!!! I hope it will go just as well in the future. My water broke, I had contractions (they hurt, like really bad mentrual cramps), but then I got the epidural when I was 5 centimeters. From that point on I did not feel anything! Even the pushing - I felt no pain. I had no tears or cuts, so no stitches. I was back to normal within 5 days! For me, the pregnancy part was way worse.

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

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Posted by ambersmom

Again, more humbling moments when the nurse has to clean you up and pack you with ice. Then they have to 'verify' everything is working correctly. But I felt AWESOME after a few hours sleep, something to eat and of course my coke I was dragging my bag down the hall of maternity at 3:30 in the morning because I wanted a shower!! The nurses thought I was crazy

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Thanks for the honesty! Can i ask you what packing you in ice is and verifying everything is working correctly.....

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

i gave so much unnecessary thought and fear to the epidural - don't be afraid of it - I tried to do without it and there was no possible way. the pushing really is not bad at all, at least I didn't think so. I didn't love the episiotomy, but everything was all right. They give you these special pads that are like cold packs for afterwards, along with tucks pads and a local anesthetic cream that really help. No doubt you feel very sore down there at first, just take your percocet and it should help!

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

Can I rec'd that you NOT watch those shows...often they edit it to be very dramatic. I HIGHLY rec'd that you take a Hypnobirthing or Bradley childbirth class. I was in total fear of childbirth until I began to see the beauty in it...the wonder of how a women's body actually works. I went from total fear to total excitiment and anticipation (like the feeling of Christmas morning when you are a child)... Did you know that fear puts your body into a state of panic and your muscles act differently? When you are afraid your uterus actually gets LESS oxygen because your body is on high alert and the oxygen goes to your muscles that are needed only. So your uterus is actually trying to work much harder than it needs to. If you are calm your uterus is not fighting an up hill battle during labor. It is proven that women who are calm and are relaxed have less pain and less need for an epidural. Epidurals are not always the best options and you should understand the pros and cons before deciding on it IMO.

A good friend of mine had demorial (sp?) and she said NEVER AGAIN...it just made her feel loopy and totally out of control of everything around her. IMO you are better off being able to understand what is happening and make decisions for yourself...but that is JMO.

If you want more info about the hypnobirthing classes let me know. I swear it is NOT hocus-pocus stuff...you are NOT under weird hypnosis..it is a self hypnosis helping you to calm yourself and learning to let go and give yourself permission to let your body do the work...

There is also a way to avoid a cut...there is a way to help yourself stretch the area prior to giving birth...most midwives teach it to their patients but I have know women who have gotten the information from OBs as well and it worked! They had either NO cut or 1 stitch with NO CUT....It is not painful or difficult to do either. And this is MUCH better IMO than being cut. Can't hurt to try.Here is How

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

I too would like to hear everyone's experiences.

I am Terrified of giving birth. I don't know if I will be able to not stress out and relax when that time comes.

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

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Posted by SeptWed

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Posted by ambersmom

Again, more humbling moments when the nurse has to clean you up and pack you with ice. Then they have to 'verify' everything is working correctly. But I felt AWESOME after a few hours sleep, something to eat and of course my coke I was dragging my bag down the hall of maternity at 3:30 in the morning because I wanted a shower!! The nurses thought I was crazy

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Thanks for the honesty! Can i ask you what packing you in ice is and verifying everything is working correctly.....

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I had mild tearing and my hemmheroids were as big as golf balls, so as soon as they got me in my room, they pack your lower region with ice packs to reduce the swelling. I had to show my nurse my pee and poop immediately following so that she 'verified' my system was working normally. I haven't showed anyone my poop since I was potty training and I wanted a sticker from Mom

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

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Posted by SeptWed

What does childbirth feel like??? Please tell me all about contractions, the actually pushing out of the baby, the 'Cut'...

PLEASE enlighten us who are going to be TTC and those that are TTC or are pregnant with thier first one.....
Thanks....

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My daughter was born a while ago -- but here's what I remember!
Labor started at 9pm. Felt like period cramps. Not so bad.
At first I didn't connect it to giving birth. But finally I
got a clue as to what was happening.

After about 2 hours - the cramps got really... BIG ... I guess is
the word I want. They'd come and it would be all I could
think about until it let up. We called the Dr. and as I was
scared, this being the first time - we decided to just go to the
hopsital. In retrospect I realize I could have stayed home
for a few more hours.

Anyway - we drive off to LIJ. I never realized how many potholes
are on the GrandCentral until we drove over them while I was
having contractions. Ugh! We got to the L&D and they exmained me
and told me to go walk around for a while. I guess they didn't
have a room ready or something. I never found out. We walked up and
down the halls for about another hour. I'd stop and clutch
the wall when the contractions would hit. All in all though it wasn't
too awful. Finally I get into a room and they hook me up to the monitor.
The baby's father sat and watched it. He would tell me when another
contraction would be coming. Do NOT allow your DH to do this!!
It just made me tense up in fear which made it all worse.

The contractions got even bigger and I started to curse ALOT. Serious
sailor mouth! But it helped me get through it. LOL
It was now about 3am. My water still hadn't broken, and my Dr. still
hadn't appeared. These 2 interns (or maybe they were residents) showed
up and wanted to break my water. I remember this clearly. The 2 of them
stood shoulder to shoulder at the end of my bed. One of them had the
crochet hook thingy held up like a sword or something. And they just
couldn't WAIT for me to say OK. I didn't. I told them they'd have to
wait for the Dr. So they went away. I didn't see them again.

At last the anethesiologist showed up to do the epidural. I HATE HATE HATE
needles and they want to put one in where??? God. The first catheter
didn't go in right so only one side of my body was numb. It felt too strange!
The guy came back and did it over - and it finally took. Also during
this time - the Dr. showed up and broke my water. Me - I went to sleep!!
Yay!

Around 8am they woke me up and turned off the drip for the epidural.
Oddly enough - I expcted the pain to come back in force but it didn't.
They told me to push. I had no problem with that. It was like it was
all I could think about. I just HAD to push. Oh - and there IS a reason
they don't let you eat all the time you're in labor and not just
because the anethesia might make you throw up. The remains of last night's
dinner made it's appearance at this time. That has to be the single most
enbarassing moment in my life!!

Anyway - this burning started deep in my groin area. I literally told the
doctor 'forget it - just put it back!' LOL. We still laugh about that comment.
The Dr. gave me the episiotomy around this time. I didn't feel it. I had
this overwhelming urge to just PUSH -- the Dr. was talking to the baby's head
and saying 'ok -- which way are you going?' because apparently he had to turn
her shoulder the right way to come out. One more push and there was my beautiful girl.
All gross and covered in blood and white slime but beautiful none-the-less! LOL!
Total time for birthing - 12 hours give or take.

They got us cleaned up and into a room. I slept like the dead for about 7 hours.
The first thing I wanted was a shower and rare roast beef sandwich which someone
snuck into the hospital for me. We went home 3 days later (I had good insurance
at the time) and everything has been just great!

One thing more I should mention - if you are choosing to breast feed - be SURE to tell
the nursing staff. I didn't and they fed my daughter from a bottle almost right away.
I had a bad time getting her to accept the breast after that. A nipple is MUCH easier to
manage and my daughter didn't like having to work for her dinner. Just FYI.

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

You should make a sign out of 1/2 a sheet of paper that reads 'I AM A BREASTFEED BABY. DO NOT GIVE ME ANY BOTTLES OR A PACIFER' remind the nurses/doctors at all time about breastfeeding your baby

Also- it is your right NOT to allow anyone to break your water...it can mess up your bodies natural labor patterns. It is also your right NOT to have an intern or resident exam you.

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

Thanks for all the advice and stories..please keep them coming...and if anyone can provide more advice that would be greatly appreciated.

What happens if your doctor is on vacation when you go into labor...are there other doctors at the hospital who will deliver for him/her? Might sound like a stupid question but i have no clue...

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

I'll give the short version. My son was breech the whole time and I was 37 weeks along and still hoping he would turn. I had scheduled a c/s for the 21st of May because he was big already and the doc would take me no less than 1 week before my due date (the 26th).

Well, that went out the window when my water broke on May 9th at 6 a.m. Since he was breech, his head wasn't there to block the flow of water and it literally gushed out like someone turned on the garden hose. I left a huge puddle on the floor! I showered and off to the hospital after we called the doc and he said to come in.

When I got to hospital, I was hooked up to the monitors and given an IV and the doc came to give me a sono to see if the baby had turned. It hadn't, so I knew then that I was headed to the OR for a c/s. I was 3 weeks early, wasn't dilated or effaced, but once your water breaks, its safest to deliver the baby within 24 hours. Since I wasn't going into labor and he was breech, Andrew was born less than 3 hours after my water broke. I only had one or two contractions while I was waiting, and they felt like really bad cramps.

I won't go into the c/s details, unless you really want to know. For me it wasn't bad and my recovery went well. I knew it was a pretty good possibility and both DH and I were prepared, which helped a lot.

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

What is the point of the catheter????

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

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Posted by salsbride06

What is the point of the catheter????

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Because you will be laying there a while - and they don't want you to urinate yourself.

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

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Posted by SeptWed
What happens if your doctor is on vacation when you go into labor...are there other doctors at the hospital who will deliver for him/her? Might sound like a stupid question but i have no clue...

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Well, they make you wait for your Dr. to come back from vacation.





Just Kidding!! Of course someone else will deliver - no worries!!

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

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Posted by brideinapril

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Posted by salsbride06

What is the point of the catheter????

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Because you will be laying there a while - and they don't want you to urinate yourself.

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I'm not sure if this question is directed at my story - but I didn't get a urinary catheter .. the epidural anethesia is actually a catheter that goes into your spinal column. The run the line in and drip some sort of anethesia into your spinal fluid. Depending on where they locate the catheter is what goes to 'sleep'.

Sounds REALLY awful I know. But they all assured me 1000 times that it was perfectly fine and I wasn't gonna be paralyzed or anything. Apparently they were right.

Re: Advice PLEASE from Girls who have had a baby

huh, you had the epidural without a urine catheter? did they get you on and off the bedpan with your legs numb?? I wish I knew that was an option! Also, I would recommend against something called STADOL - it's an IV pain medicine they give me when I was still too afraid of the epidural, and for me, it was horrible, I felt like I was high on drugs and out of control of myself, it was a terrible feeling. Then the nurses kept calling my baby a 'stadol baby' because she wouldn't latch on and apparantly stadol makes them very sleepy for the first 48 hours, which no one had told me!