Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

Well, look at it that you are still going to get married and you will have a lot more money left over. I know you must be devestated, but just remember that you love each other and should do what is best for you.

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

Sorry to hear that you are upset!

On the bright side you still have each other, and at least you are getting married and starting a wonderful life together!

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

So sorry Amy, but I would not be embarrassed at all, your FH sounds like he has a good head on his shoulders, and wedding stress is definately not for everybody..my DH had me down size the wedding right in the mist of my planning, and I am so glad we did. It is a wonderful night, but it is just one night..you have your whole life ahead of you to look forward to great times with your FH. Another wedding, another review...I think you switching it up to a lake wedding will give us all something to look foward to the planning process and your creative juices flowing. Chin up and happy planning!!

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

I am soo sorry.
I understand how you feel. But everything happends for a reason, Maybe the smaller wedding will be everything you imagined and more.
It could be worse he could have said forget the wedding all together.
Good luck with everything.

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

I am so sorry that it didn't work out the way you wanted it to.... but the important thing is that you are still together and will still be married....trust me, when it's all said and done - it's one day - marriage is for a lifetime. Being together is what counts Don't worry about what other people are thinking - it will be a blip on their radar and then they will forget about it.

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

i'm so sorry this happened to you but you know what... smaller weddings are so much more intimate and better. i had 280 people at my wedding and it was chaos! i knew maybe 60 of the guests. it's too overwhelming. i love the lake venue! your pictures will come out so great! it'll be so much better you'll see.

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

I am sorry to hear that! I am sure it will all work out in the end

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

I'm so sorry. I'm sure your wedding will be wonderful no matter where it is. Best of luck to you!

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

I am so sorry to hear that I wish you two the best. And no matter what decsion you make at least you will stll be marrying the man you love.

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

I'm so sorry that you wont be having the wedding of your dreams. But you are still marrying the man that you love.

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

Im so sorry. On the bright side though a wedding by the lake sounds beautiful. Dont be embarassed either there's no need. We did it and put the wedding back to 2007 and everyone was real supportive.

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

Hi Amy, I wish you and your FH all the best! There is nothing wrong with foregoing all the big plans and the $$ for a smaller intimate wedding. Katrina was so right....we get caught up in so many things as brides, and maybe a smaller affair will simply celebrate the love you have for each other! That's what a wedding's all about anyway!
Best of luck to you both!

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

I am so sorry you are going through this.

I really truly understand what you are going through...The stress of the wedding really gets to me sometimes and as hard and sad as it is to say sometimes I have had the urge to just give up and call off the wedding just to go back to the days of no fighting and less stress and living together happily. My FH is my best friend and I could never picture my life without him and I know he feels the same but this wedding has sort of taken on a life of its own. We fight a lot when the pressures of more money, more appointments, and more details to be discussed come into play but we work through them and I never thought I would say this, but we both come out better for it. This trying time has helped us more than anything to really get to know eachother and learn how to better handle things that arise. We have never been closer beacuase of all those wedding related fights and I truly believe you will be the same.

See if there is any room for discussion. See if perhaps there is a meeting ground between you. Just realize you are so much stronger together as a team and when both of you are happy. It is much easier said than done but you will find your way. If not now then later at your lakeside wedding.

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

Aww chin up! The wedding might have been called off, but it seems to me that your FH is focuing on the important part - the relationship. There is no harm in canceling the 'big wedding' and having something more intimate , it will be equally beautifu. And its a great sign that your FH feels as though he wants to be sure of everything and focus on the three of you by living together first - to me that is a very positive sign

Wishing you the best of luck.. and remember that its not the 'wedding' that is important, its the relationship .. The family you will have with you, your son and your fiancee is what truly matters

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

I'm sorry to hear that Amy. Just be happy the reception you were planning was called off and not the wedding completely. its more important that the 2 of you work on ur relationship...u'll still get married

Good Luck

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

Sorry to be a little negative here, but I speak from some experience. I think Shamrock touched on an important point...

I think you really need to sit down with FH and hash EVERYTHING out....

Why is what he wants so much more important than what you want (the big beautiful wedding)?

I feel like he is being selfish and inconsiderate and I think you need to wonder about him as a result.

Maybe there is more to it....but it needs to be discussed further!

FH and I broke up for 2 months prior to getting engaged. I was in law school before that and he felt neglected for 3 years and never said anything!!! So finally he broke things off without ever explaining that he had all of those emotions built up for so long.

When we did get back together we talked about EVERYTHING and our relationship has been wonderful ever since.

I feel like your FH is holding whatever it is he is feeling inside and he needs to explain himself to you and also be considerate of you and what you want....

I would rather get everything out in the open now then down the line...

JMO....

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

So sorry to hear this. I agree with those who said you should talk everything out and see if there is room for compromise. It is so important that both of you be on the same page and feel that your needs are both being met. If not, you or your FI could end up with a lot of resentment. I think that if after talking both of you want a lakeside wedding, then do it. It sounds wonderful! But both of you have to be open and honest about what you really want. In the end, you have to be happy with your decision. You have no reason to feel embarassed at all. Best of of luck!!

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

So sorry, to hear this

Keep in mind though that things have a way of working themselves out (for the better)

Good luck!

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

I agree with what Katrina said, but I also see shamrock's point.

I think you both should discuss this further. You moving in with him THEN having a wedding may be his way of postponing your wedding without actually coming out and saying so. Just make sure you don't move in and then the wedding plans cease all together.....and you become a comon law wife...I have seen this happen before.
Not trying to scare you, just trying to cover all the bases here. I think you need to find out the true REASON behind all this. It's one thing to say he doesn't want a large wedding and wants you to move in first, but you need to know why the sudden change.....especially after booking the hall and ordering the STD'S

Keep us posted on how it goes....

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

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Posted by SomethingBlu

Amy - I am so sorry! I will keep you and your fi in my prayers, trust in God during this most difficult time, there is always tomorrow!

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Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

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Posted by nov04LIbride

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Posted by SomethingBlu

Amy - I am so sorry! I will keep you and your fi in my prayers, trust in God during this most difficult time, there is always tomorrow!

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Even if you don't get your huge wedding (which from your previous posts it sounded like you decided upon only because of pressure from both of your families, when what you both had agreed on originally was a small destination wedding), no one died--this is not the most difficult time you will encounter. It kind of sounds like from what you posted before like maybe you weren't clear to him about what matters most to you. Are you agreeing to everything he says for fear he might call it off? Are you afraid to say this is what you really want? To me, his point definitely makes sense, and I tend to be more rational and if I didn't have the $, I wouldn't have a huge wedding, but I know many people disagree. Was your first wedding a large affair or a smaller one too?

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Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

I'm sorry. Maybe you can still worki something out, get a smaller room at the JT, save money on other things. I really think something must have happenned or be going on for FH to just come home one night like that and say all of that when you've already gone through all of the planning. before you start planning another wedding, PLEASE find out what the root cause was that made him come home THAT day and say those things he's never said before, what was going on in his head. And why do you have to go along with exactly what HE wants? It's supposed to be a compromise, and he DID say he wanted you to be happy. If I were you I'd want to find out what changed, and what was going on inside his head. Good Luck

Re: I believe the wedding has been called off :(

Amy-I am so sorry to hear about this. I remember reading your posts at the beginning of the week and you sounded very stressed!

I wish you all the best!