Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding - UPDATE MOM RESPONSE

and get married next month.

i am set to get married next october, but for a while i've been thinking about forgetting the whole big wedding/reception and just doing something veeery simple. i've never been one to elope, but i learned that brides get married in central park.

now this is gonna sound typical, but my mom has been making me horribly miserable since the day fh asked for my parent's blessing. it's a lot of stuff and i think that today just did it for me. i'm not gonna get into it.

i told my dad earlier that fh and i are gonna cancel the wedding and get married next month. he flipped. i haven't told my mom yet - though i'm sure it will be a lot of drama and put-downs (nothing new) and she might not even come to the wedding.

i em'd the photog to see when he is available in the month of october, even if at all. hopefully (please pray) he'll say yes. and i'm gonna go see a dress today that i saw a few months ago while dress shopping that i thought was perfect for a park/beach wedding.

please - i guess i just need prayers and hugs.

UPDATE - i just told my mom and she caught an attitude (typical) and said that we can do whatever we want, but just to let her know. and that if i'm stressed out it must be from elsewhere b/c it is impossible that she would be causing me any anxiety. then she proceeded to again justify that her requests are not out of the ordinary and that i should be doing it her way. ultimately, she said just to let her know so that she can be free that day.

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

Good luck!!

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

follow your heart

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

If this is something you've been thinking about and really want, then I wish you the best of luck! Whatever you decide, it is the right decision for you.

However, if you really do want the big wedding, then have it. Many brides (myself included) experience a great deal of family drama leading up to the wedding. Who won't come if this person is invited, who is making it all about them, etc. It can really get to you. If the big wedding is what you want, you should have it. Perhaps you can sit down with your family and explain yourself. I know some brides have severed ties with those who are making them miserable.

Whatever you decide, I wish you much love and happiness.

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

do what makes you and FH happy!!

good luck!!!!!!!!

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

Good luck! I have seriously considered canning it all and just doing something small for financial reasons!

Good luck to you! I hope you have the wedding of your dreams, whatever it is!

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

Good luck with your photographer. I think there is a lot of potential to turn something negative into a positive thing... Central park is a great choice! If you need inspiration, here are some pictures of Central Park in fall, it is simply BREATHTAKING!!



Angel of the Waters fountain at Bethesda Terrace (a lot of bride & grooms take pics here)

Belvidere Castle

Belvidere Castle 2

Sax in a tunnel

Strawberry Fields



I'm actually jealous. Central Park was the first choice for us, but logistically it was too much of a hassle.

I sincerely hope everything works out for you both.

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

i hope everything works out for you. follow your heart. my best to you

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

Good luck! I like your idea and think it makes alot of sense!!!

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

do what makes you happy

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

Good luck! No matter what you decide it will be beautiful since you are marrying the love of your life!

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

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Posted by hmpena

If this is something you've been thinking about and really want, then I wish you the best of luck! Whatever you decide, it is the right decision for you.

However, if you really do want the big wedding, then have it. Many brides (myself included) experience a great deal of family drama leading up to the wedding. Who won't come if this person is invited, who is making it all about them, etc. It can really get to you. If the big wedding is what you want, you should have it. Perhaps you can sit down with your family and explain yourself. I know some brides have severed ties with those who are making them miserable.

Whatever you decide, I wish you much love and happiness.

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totally agree. i SO know where you are coming from with all the mamma drama b/c omg my mom has really put me through A LOT... and when i see so many brides going and doing so much with their mommers it totally breaks my heart b/c i have NEVER had that-- not once. and it's sad for me b/c everyone tells me it should be the happiest time in my life but i feel like something is missing (which would be that excitement, love and support from her). and i got to the point where i said the same thing that you are saying now to myself-- but in the end, i needed to do what i wanted and i needed to STOP making decisions based on other people's actions... meaning, i stopped letting my mom (and other family member's behavior) steer what i did and the decisions i made.... b/c ultimately, they were not coming from me-- they were being provoked by someone else.

so if that is the case with you be very careful-- listen to your heart and what YOU want and try hard (even tho it's not easy) to shut out other people's influences... b/c you will regret it forever if you don't :(

i hope, no matter what happens, you do what is best for you and what makes you and FH (of course) happy.

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

Well... see it this way. You are NOT cancelling your wedding. You are cancelling the way you are getting married.

They are plenty of different ways to get married. A park is really pretty and romantic.

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Lot's of luck to you both!!!!

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

good luck!

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It does not matter how you get married. What's important is who your marrying. Do it your way and remind your Mom that she had her wedding her way. Now it's your time for you and FH to make your own decisions.

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yeah - i did. when i told my dad he said what's the point of getting married if you're not gonna make your parents and his parents happy. i said, 'what about what makes us happy?' his response was 'what about it?' i think that would sum up a lot of what has been going on.

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Posted by Audreygirl

yeah - i did. when i told my dad he said what's the point of getting married if you're not gonna make your parents and his parents happy. i said, 'what about what makes us happy?' his response was 'what about it?' i think that would sum up a lot of what has been going on.

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Then you are better off doing what you want. It's about you and your FH.

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

I say go for it - I saw a couple get married in central park with just a few friends, and it was sooo beautiful and special!!!!

Re: Think I'm Cancelling the Wedding

I think it sounds like a beautiful way to get married. A wedding is the union of two people, not a big party. I know that I really wanted the big party and would have had regrets if I didn't have it, but as long as you feel that you will be accepting on your decision years from now, then I say go for it.
The fact of the matter is, this is about you and your FH- no matter what your parents may sasy. You need to do what will make you happy and they will just have to get on board.