First BM drama..my head hurts.........sorry so long! with poll!
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gettinghizitched
Getting my life back!!!
Member since 6/07 1108 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/21/2008 11:00 AM
Wed. Location:
Venetian Yacht Club
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Re: First BM drama..my head hurts.........sorry so long! with poll!
Posted by angl2001
no problem i hope it all works out
Thanks!
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Posted 11/13/07 3:37 PM 
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bride-in-training08
Board Enthusiast
Member since 7/07 94 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/18/2008 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
The Woodlands
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Re: First BM drama..my head hurts.........sorry so long! with poll!
I have been in a similar situation and it was eating away at me the same that it is eating at you. The more time has passed the less concerned I have become with it. You asked her to be in your party and if she thought it would be a problem (on any level) she should have said no...since she didn't that hopefully indicates that she wants to be a part of your day. Unfortunately it may not be in the "yay I'm getting married be happy " kind of way. If this is the case just remember you have plenty of other friends and BMs who will be there for you (fortunately I have 11) and I know that you refuse to let one person ruin your day! With all that brides have to worry about, I would just push her into the background. I know it is easier said then done, but try and remember what is most important to YOU!!!
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Posted 11/13/07 3:54 PM
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anneandchris
Married and Fabulous
Member since 8/07 5331 total posts
Wedding Date:
11/1/2008 2:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Villa Lombardi's
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Re: First BM drama..my head hurts.........sorry so long! with poll!
Posted by davenjess
honest opinion time & i know that's what you want.
i voted other...i wanted to do this with Dave's sister but didn't - as i was afraid of his mom's reaction...
i would sit her down & talk to her. Explain to her that you don't want to put her out & make things financially harder for her.....so you are asking her to be 100% sure she wants to be in the bridal party. You don't want her to resent you for the decision you made to ask her.
You need to express sincerely to her that you will not be offended and you'd be honored if she'd take on another role at the wedding or something along those lines. Also - tell her that you would like to give her a few days to think about it....so she doesn't have to tell you immediately...
I think this would be your best option - as this is frustration that isn't fair for you to have to deal with.
At that point - she can say no & bow out gracefully but if she insists....then she's in and it's her issue.
Well said!!!!!!!
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Posted 11/13/07 3:58 PM
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