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NEW Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

eliz808

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WEDDING DATE
6/5/2005 5:00 PM

WEDDING LOCATION
Essex House, NYC

 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

Blu-ize

Blu-ize

My House

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WEDDING DATE
2/28/1998 6:00 PM

WEDDING LOCATION
East Meadow Jewish Center

It is my understanding that it needs to be a solid gold band that has no interuptions. It has to be a perfect circle. I borrowed one from my MIL to get married in and then put my diamond band on after we were married. I hope I explained that right. The concept should be right.
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

swags1016

So in love

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7/26/2003 12:30 PM

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East Wind- The Estate- A+

I was always told the band for the ceremony had to be a continous circle with no breaks in it- so no diamond band for the ceremony. Doesn't mean you can't put it on right after the ceremony though
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

eliz808

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WEDDING DATE
6/5/2005 5:00 PM

WEDDING LOCATION
Essex House, NYC

thank girls
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

marymoon

marymoon

FINALLY!?!?!

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WEDDING DATE
6/19/2010 7:30 PM

It really depends on your rabbi and what s/he says you can do. but traditionally it has to be a solid gold band because it is used as consideration in the marriage contract (this is why jewish ceremonies are one ring ceremonies), and if it had gemstones, there could be doubt about if they were real or not and what the true value of the ring is. This is hos my professor (a conservative rabbi) explained it. I'm not sure what we';re going to do, because we definitely want a 2 ring ceremony, which according to jewish law would nullify the marriage... but if they say I need a solid gold band, I'll probably just get 2 wedding bands, I've heard a lot of brides on here say they were doing that
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

randella

randella

I'm somebody's wife???

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WEDDING DATE
4/16/2005 7:00 PM

WEDDING LOCATION
The Carltun

it depends-- it is supposed to be a solid band-- but my cantor who is marrying us says we can use anything.. we were going to use FMILs gold band for the ceremony- but since the cantor didn't care- I'd rather use the ring I am actually going to wear as my wedding band.
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

marymoon

marymoon

FINALLY!?!?!

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6/19/2010 7:30 PM

Oh, here's n excerpt forma paper I wrote in college on Jewish Weddings..in it I cite anita Diamants "The New Jewish Wedding", and To Be a Jew, written from an orthodox perspective..I don't remember the author's first name, but it's the book people often give kids when they get bar mitzvahed.
___________________________________
The Kiddushin occurs when the groom presents the bride with a ring and says “Be sanctified to me with this ring in accordance with the law of Moses and Israel.” In this way, the rabbi or cantor does not marry the couple; they marry each other. The ring signifies kinyan or acquisition. The ring is usually made of pure gold with no stones in it. This is because there must be no misrepresentation of the ring’s value, or the marriage will be nullified. The ring should also be the groom’s property. He must give it to the bride. It is not a temporary symbol but a legal possession (Donin, 288). In more recent times, many Jewish couples have adopted the more Christian tradition of exchanging rings. Many Orthodox rabbis will not officiate at weddings where this takes place. An exchange invalidates the kinyan. However couples are increasingly seeking more equal weddings and the exchange of rings is seen more and more often (Diamant, 82).
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

beautyq115

beautyq115

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WEDDING DATE
7/16/2006 3:00 PM

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Swan Club...AMAZING

I am not a Jewish Bride...but I find this thread interesting Good Luck girls
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

Jax430

Jax430

Beyond Obsession

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WEDDING DATE
6/27/2004 6:00 PM

WEDDING LOCATION
East Meadow Jewish Center

I borrowed my mom's original gold wedding band for our ceremony and changed to my eternity band right after. DH did not own the ring...our rabbi said it was just important that he was the one who paid for the Ketubah.

We did a double ring ceremony, but I did not say anything in Hebrew, just some English made up to give the woman a part without negating the Kinyan.

My Rabbi's best line, since the groom's ring doesn't really count, "Jackie, put the ring anywhere you want on Brad." My 5 year old nephew and ring bearer replies, "put it on the ring finger!"
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

Goldi1021

Goldi1021

Growing a miracle in my belly!

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WEDDING DATE
2/18/2006 7:00 PM

WEDDING LOCATION
Temple Avodah

I plan on using one of my sisters solid yellow gold "I got too fat during my pregnancy so I wore this" bands for the ceremony as The NEW JEWISH WEDDING says:

"A band made of a single pure metal, with no holes breaking the circle, represents the wholeness achieved through marriage and a hope for an unbroken union."

I do not plan on having a band with stones until my first anniversary. After the ceremony, I will be switching to a plain band that matches my e-ring. I at least want the band too coordinate until I get the other bling.
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

lrs2005

lrs2005

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WEDDING DATE
8/28/2005 12:00 AM

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booked

Does it have to be gold or will platinum be ok? I did not really think about this and DF just bought me a plain platinum band. Will that work?
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

Goldi1021

Goldi1021

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WEDDING DATE
2/18/2006 7:00 PM

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Temple Avodah

Any metal is fine - except aluminum foil. Gold Silver or Platinum is just fine.
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

eogara

eogara

Newlyweds!!!!

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4/3/2005 6:00 PM

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Milleridge Cottage

Speak to your rabbi. A more reformed rabbi probably will not care but more conservative definitely will.
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

Goldi1021

Goldi1021

Growing a miracle in my belly!

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WEDDING DATE
2/18/2006 7:00 PM

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Temple Avodah

The Reform movement tends to make many more allowances in terms of most traditions. I was raised in a conservative home, but tend to practice Reform Judaism. However, many Jewish people are known to be somewhat superstitious about certain things in regard to weddings. (i.e veiling ceremonies, giving knives, using scissors to open presents etc.) They are even superstitious when it comes to the births of children. A traditional Jewish family would not bring anything for the baby into their home until after the child is born. Layettes are ordered and paid for but not brought into the home until the child is born. I am not religious, but I am observant within Reform Judaism. I simply prefer to follow the traditions I believe in. Holes in a ring? Not for me. I like the symbolism of what a solid band means. I would simply switch the band during Yichud (when a couple breaks bread together as man and wife for the first time).
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

Ladybug63

Ladybug63

Baby on the Brain

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11/03

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WEDDING DATE
9/23/2005 4:00 PM

WEDDING LOCATION
Timber Point CC

I'm not Jewish but my Godmother is! Don't ask
Anyway she insists that I am married with a solid, unbroken Gold band...from a happy marriage.
I think she may have added that happy marriage think but never the less, I'm borrowing my cousins band for the ceremony and putting my real band (has diamonds) on after.
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

May05Bride

May05Bride

Hawaii is AWESOME!

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WEDDING DATE
5/29/2005 7:30 PM

We are getting married by a reform Cantor and he said what ever we decide is fine with him. We chose to go with a solid band.. since when I travel for my job I would want to leave the diamond band at home and that way I will also have a solid band that I will take with me.
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

sophie78

It's An Obsession

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9/18/2004 12:00 AM

We had an interfaith ceremony. The rabbi did not care, so I went with the eternity ring.
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

marymoon

marymoon

FINALLY!?!?!

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WEDDING DATE
6/19/2010 7:30 PM

Read up on it. It completely depends on your rabbi or cantor and your personal choice. Ask your family if they have a custom.

A lot of people talk about borrowing a ring, even though traditionally it nulllfies the kinyan, as does a double rng ceremony, but traditions run the gamut. Some people have a 2 ring veremony with an eternity band or somehting borrowed, and the rabbi and cantor have no problem with it, while another may insist on sticking to the most strict guidelines
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

Goldi1021

Goldi1021

Growing a miracle in my belly!

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WEDDING DATE
2/18/2006 7:00 PM

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Temple Avodah

Posted by marymoon

A lot of people talk about borrowing a ring, even though traditionally it nulllfies the kinyan, as does a double rng ceremony, but traditions run the gamut. Some people have a 2 ring veremony with an eternity band or somehting borrowed, and the rabbi and cantor have no problem with it, while another may insist on sticking to the most strict guidelines



I wonder if FH "purchased" my sisters gold band from her before the wedding for a nominal fee, and then "gave" it to me, if that would be considered HIS to give to me at that point. Something worth asking about.

 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

marymoon

marymoon

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6/19/2010 7:30 PM

That could work!
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

Goldi1021

Goldi1021

Growing a miracle in my belly!

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WEDDING DATE
2/18/2006 7:00 PM

WEDDING LOCATION
Temple Avodah

I also wonder if I gave FH a ring AFTER the ceremony, if it could then be considered a wedding GIFT. OOOOH lots of questions.
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

marymoon

marymoon

FINALLY!?!?!

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It all sounds good to me, but then again I am all about bending the rules

Also, i'm not even jewish, all i know about judaism has come from extensive reading and college courses..that's why I usually have a very different perspective than the people who post who ARE jewish
 
 
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NEW Re: Do Jewish brides need to have a gold wedding ring for the ceremony or can it be a diamond band?

Goldi1021

Goldi1021

Growing a miracle in my belly!

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WEDDING DATE
2/18/2006 7:00 PM

WEDDING LOCATION
Temple Avodah

Posted by marymoon

It all sounds good to me, but then again I am all about bending the rules

Also, i'm not even jewish, all i know about judaism has come from extensive reading and college courses..that's why I usually have a very different perspective than the people who post who ARE jewish



I was raised Jewish and took a few courses in religion and Judaism in college as well. I found that the people who were NOT Jewish did better in those classes because they took the infomation at face value. Whereas the Jewish students questioned everything that they were taught growing up and how it may or may not have presented with conflicts in the different interpretations of the Torah and other scriptures.

 
 
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