Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

I'm sure this has been visited already but I need to know.
Is it a Yes or a No.
Do you give the cheapies that came partied, ate your food, and then left w/o so much as a card?

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

Girl, there has been some huge debates on this issue.

In my case, I didn't. My favor was enough for those tacky folks that enjoyed a great wedding at an elegant place with amazing food and music.

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

Liz - I just posted about this. I am laughing reading your message. That's why I posted, IMO NO I am not sending them a Thank You. But that is why we have these boards, so unbiased people can give us an outside honest view.

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

LIZ LMAO!!!!!!!!!

Do you give the cheapies that came partied, ate your food, and then left w/o so much as a card?


I had 2 stiffers & I am not sending anything!! I don't care what's right or wrong, I am NOT!

And maybe when others get a card & she doesn't, and she knows the others did, and she will know, she will get the message that shes a stiffer

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

Natsha well said!!!

The favor is enough for their cheap asses

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

Liz how many stiffers did you get?

I had TWO 1 couple & 1 single woman or do i say S lut? since she left to go have a threesome with one of my guests & his girlfriend?

I guess my freind got my wedding gift

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

OK - I just posted on the other thread

I will send a card and thank the people who came to my wedding anbd have not given us a gift.

edited to add

I agree that it should be enough that the came ate and partied, but its just the way I am

Message edited 6/27/2003 8:18:10 AM.

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

I have to go through the list, but I'd say I had about 5

I plan on sending them NOTHING, but Len said we have to.
Well, guess what? I SEND THEM OUT !!! HE DOES NOTHING

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

Liz 5? Whats wrong with people? Wether it be 1, 5, or 10, not even an empty card Liz??

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

I'm cracking myself up now

But serously, isn't the favor gift enough for the cheapies?

I thought the favor is to say Thank you for coming, and the TY card is to say, Thank you for the gift.
Am I wrong?


In the case of one person, who just had a baby, lived in Mass, came down, and told me she was broke, I told her bring no gift, I don't consider that a stiffer. If someone has a circumstance, I understand, and they will get a TY. I'm talking TRUE CHEAPIES

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

Liz EXACTLY! WELL SAID!!!

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

I had two couples that gave us nothing. One couple just sent us a case of wine over the weekend (10 months after wedding) because my husband came running to their aid for their daughter that was late coming home from a movie.

I looked at it this way. They came, ate, drank, danced and even walked out with a bottle of Pindar wine. Whatever ettiquette states in a situation like this, it went out the window for me. If they couldnt even give a card, then they have no knowledge of what ettiquette is and wont notice my missing thank you.

This topic has been posted before and alot of people say you should thank them for spending your day with you. I disagree in this situation.

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

We sent thank you cards to the people who came and didn't even give us a card. One guy ate his meal and ordered the meals for the two no-shows at his table,ate all three meals and didn't even give us a card!
We just wrote "Thank you for being there with us on our wedding day."
Actually people like that should have sent us a card to say thank you.

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

My uncle came to the wedding and didn't bring a gift. However he did travel from Florida and he is my Uncle, so I did send him a Thank You. Other friends of my Mom didn't give a gift, but are the type to say, "we have up to a year" so my Mom said they will give us a gift and therefore I haven't sent them a thank you yet.

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

This is an interesting topic. Everyone who came to our wedding gave us a gift. I was a bit surprised that I didn't have one cheapo because there are one or two people on DH's side who have stiffed others and from whom I wouldn't be shocked at such behavior. However, if we had gotten stiffed, I don't think I would have written a thank you. I realize the logic is that a thank you without mention of a gift might make the cheapo feel guilty, but like someone already mentioned, you need a conscience to feel guilty which they obviously don't have if they didn't acknowledge your special day by doing something other than eating your food.

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

This is a great question - maybe you girls can help me on this one - 3 people (ages 16, 22 & 24) all from the same house - 1 gave a card and gift and the other 2 gave not even a card. Do I have the
Balls to send a thank you to just the one person that gave a gift?

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

Wow I was going to post this today!!

We have an instance where we can't figure out if we were stiffed or the envelope was lost....I have no idea what to write!

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

I didn't have any non-gifters at our wedding. Even those that didn't show up let us no on time (a day or 2) and still provided us with a great gift.

If I were you I would send them absolutely nothing. I would not even think about it anymore.

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

I didn't because they didn't even give me a card or say goodbye to me at the end of the night. People can be so rude sometimes.

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

I did - It was your basic thank you for coming, my mother wouldn't let me add "you cheap a$$'

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

I still sent a card. I don' feel its right to assume everyone has to give a gift at the wedding. I was just very happy that people showed up to show support and enjoy our day.

I sent everyone thank you cards. I am glad I did as the people who did not give us gifts at the wedding later mailed us gifts.

Send everyone a thank you card. They are not expensive.

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

I sent a thank you card to each guest who attended the wedding, gift or no gift. The thank you card is NOT to really thank them just for a gift but for joining you on your special day. Just because other people are rude doesn't mean I have to stoop to their level.

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

yes, I gave the two cheap @$$es a TY card even though they didn't even bring us a card to our wedding.

I decided to rise above their tackiness and show them proper ettiquette, for thanking them for being a part of our day.

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

just wondering who were these people to you? were they friends, family

This post makes me laugh my wedding is coming soon and I never thought that people can be so rude. I think you absolutely should bring a gift or at least a card. to come to the wedding with no gift at all is ridiculous. I do belive that if the people can not afford it of course thats one thing you are inviting them because you want them there but they should at least have the decency to write out card thanking "us" for inviting them. People are unbelievable at times. Bless them. I also think that leaving without saying goodbye is the worst. I just had my shower and someon from my work just got up and left withouts saying goodbye to me or anybody. That really did **** me off. And show some class that was my boss!!!

Re: Thank you cards to Non-gift givers..............

definately dont send one... they came to your ceremony... you already thanked them with

1- a favor
2. a free dinner with alcohol...



***edited... sorry didnt realize this was on the newlywed board.. i was searching for favors and just posted cause it was recent... sorry

Message edited 6/28/2003 10:19:12 PM.