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Appropriate gift for Chinese wedding?
margaritav Posted: Jul 16, 2009 10:51 AM+
margaritav MEMBER SINCE: 1/09 TOTAL POSTS : 39 WEDDING DATE: Sep 19, 2009
Posted: Jul 16, 2009 10:51 AM bride-minus.png

Appropriate gift for Chinese wedding?

I am going to a friend / co-worker's wedding this Saturday and the ceremony & reception will be at a Chinese banquet hall. She is having about 500 people (!!) and the food will be served family style. I know that this is not as expensive as a traditional reception hall, but I'm not really sure how much it's costing her. Any idea what an appropriate gift p/p is for this type of wedding?

TIA!
kris_gets_hitched Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:11 AM+
kris_gets_hitched MEMBER SINCE: 3/09 TOTAL POSTS : 13924 WEDDING DATE: Jun 20, 2010
Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:11 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Appropriate gift for Chinese wedding?

I would just give whatever I would normally give for a friend/co-worker's wedding. I'm not a fan of the 'pay for your plate' concept.
If a friend/coworker of mine was having a reception in their backyard, I'd still give the same amount as I would if they had it in a hall. Because what I'm giving is a gift for the couple to use as they begin their lives together.
wo0shply Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:15 AM+
wo0shply MEMBER SINCE: 6/07 TOTAL POSTS : 3837 WEDDING DATE: Oct 12, 2008
Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:15 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Appropriate gift for Chinese wedding?


Posted by kris_gets_hitched

I would just give whatever I would normally give for a friend/co-worker's wedding. I'm not a fan of the 'pay for your plate' concept.
If a friend/coworker of mine was having a reception in their backyard, I'd still give the same amount as I would if they had it in a hall. Because what I'm giving is a gift for the couple to use as they begin their lives together.



I totally agree.
margaritav Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:20 AM+
margaritav MEMBER SINCE: 1/09 TOTAL POSTS : 39 WEDDING DATE: Sep 19, 2009
Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:20 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Appropriate gift for Chinese wedding?


Posted by kris_gets_hitched

I would just give whatever I would normally give for a friend/co-worker's wedding. I'm not a fan of the 'pay for your plate' concept.
If a friend/coworker of mine was having a reception in their backyard, I'd still give the same amount as I would if they had it in a hall. Because what I'm giving is a gift for the couple to use as they begin their lives together.



I see what you're saying but I am not trying to be stingy - at the same time I don't want to give too much because that's awkward as well. What's appropriate for a co-worker's wedding? For anyone else I give $150 p/p (for traditional weddings) and if it's family I give more - but this diferent, so I don't want to mess it up. And I want to at LEAST cover my plate, which is also why I am asking.
AFutureBride Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:26 AM+
AFutureBride MEMBER SINCE: 9/08 TOTAL POSTS : 1189 WEDDING DATE: Aug 01, 2009
Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:26 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Appropriate gift for Chinese wedding?

For Chinese Wedding you bring money in a red envelope. It is usually collected when you arrive into the banquet hall where you find your seating assignment.

Give what you normally give at weddings. I went to my coworkers wedding in Chinatown at a banquet hall and there were 500 ppl. I gave just over $200. Where the wedding is doesnt matter to me...
Just Cindy Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:32 AM+
Just Cindy MEMBER SINCE: 1/08 TOTAL POSTS : 5036 WEDDING DATE: Sep 12, 2009
Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:32 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Appropriate gift for Chinese wedding?

Usually gifts are $100 pp depending on how close you are to her and what is being served but $100 is a good figure.
AFutureBride Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:33 AM+
AFutureBride MEMBER SINCE: 9/08 TOTAL POSTS : 1189 WEDDING DATE: Aug 01, 2009
Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:33 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Appropriate gift for Chinese wedding?


Posted by margaritav


Posted by kris_gets_hitched

I would just give whatever I would normally give for a friend/co-worker's wedding. I'm not a fan of the 'pay for your plate' concept.
If a friend/coworker of mine was having a reception in their backyard, I'd still give the same amount as I would if they had it in a hall. Because what I'm giving is a gift for the couple to use as they begin their lives together.



I see what you're saying but I am not trying to be stingy - at the same time I don't want to give too much because that's awkward as well. What's appropriate for a co-worker's wedding? For anyone else I give $150 p/p (for traditional weddings) and if it's family I give more - but this diferent, so I don't want to mess it up. And I want to at LEAST cover my plate, which is also why I am asking.



What is awkward about giving too much money? I don't understand this part...

I interpret this as, you give a certain amount of money only to find out people gave way less than you did. As a result you feel jipped? Is this what you mean feeling awkward?

Just trying to understand what you are saying.
AFutureBride Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:35 AM+
AFutureBride MEMBER SINCE: 9/08 TOTAL POSTS : 1189 WEDDING DATE: Aug 01, 2009
Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:35 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Appropriate gift for Chinese wedding?


Posted by Just Cindy

Usually gifts are $100 pp depending on how close you are to her and what is being served but $100 is a good figure.



ITA - $100 is the minimum amount I give per person when I attend weddings.
wo0shply Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:52 AM+
wo0shply MEMBER SINCE: 6/07 TOTAL POSTS : 3837 WEDDING DATE: Oct 12, 2008
Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:52 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Appropriate gift for Chinese wedding?


Posted by margaritav


Posted by kris_gets_hitched

I would just give whatever I would normally give for a friend/co-worker's wedding. I'm not a fan of the 'pay for your plate' concept.
If a friend/coworker of mine was having a reception in their backyard, I'd still give the same amount as I would if they had it in a hall. Because what I'm giving is a gift for the couple to use as they begin their lives together.



I see what you're saying but I am not trying to be stingy - at the same time I don't want to give too much because that's awkward as well. What's appropriate for a co-worker's wedding? For anyone else I give $150 p/p (for traditional weddings) and if it's family I give more - but this diferent, so I don't want to mess it up. And I want to at LEAST cover my plate, which is also why I am asking.



If you're unsure I would say $100 per person is a reasonable gift for a coworker
RPMG26599 Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:56 AM+
RPMG26599 MEMBER SINCE: 12/08 TOTAL POSTS : 1027 WEDDING DATE: Oct 09, 2009 WEDDING LOCATION: Leonards of Great Neck
Posted: Jul 16, 2009 11:56 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Appropriate gift for Chinese wedding?

What makes this wedding any different than any other?

My minimum is $100.00 per person. That should be fine =)
margaritav Posted: Jul 16, 2009 05:47 PM+
margaritav MEMBER SINCE: 1/09 TOTAL POSTS : 39 WEDDING DATE: Sep 19, 2009
Posted: Jul 16, 2009 05:47 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Appropriate gift for Chinese wedding?


Posted by AFutureBride


Posted by margaritav


Posted by kris_gets_hitched

I would just give whatever I would normally give for a friend/co-worker's wedding. I'm not a fan of the 'pay for your plate' concept.
If a friend/coworker of mine was having a reception in their backyard, I'd still give the same amount as I would if they had it in a hall. Because what I'm giving is a gift for the couple to use as they begin their lives together.



I see what you're saying but I am not trying to be stingy - at the same time I don't want to give too much because that's awkward as well. What's appropriate for a co-worker's wedding? For anyone else I give $150 p/p (for traditional weddings) and if it's family I give more - but this diferent, so I don't want to mess it up. And I want to at LEAST cover my plate, which is also why I am asking.



What is awkward about giving too much money? I don't understand this part...

I interpret this as, you give a certain amount of money only to find out people gave way less than you did. As a result you feel jipped? Is this what you mean feeling awkward?

Just trying to understand what you are saying.



What I am trying to say that I don't want to make the recipient feel weird or obligated if I give more than what she would expect. For example, for my shower I got some very expensive gifts from people that I didn't expect much from - I definitely appreciated it, but felt a little guilty, too. Maybe that's just me.

Thanks for the advice everyone!
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