ANYONE ELSE FEELING THIS WAY

I heard about brides become despondant after the wedding, but this is ridiculous. I want to go back and do it all over again. I feel like I really didn't enjoy the day. It was over so quickly. Am I crazy or is it that I am so bored now at work with no wedding planning to do that it's getting to me.

My guests said they loved it, but I keep feeling I could have done better. Am I alone in this? What's weird is that this is coming from someone who grew up never wnating to get married... unreal I know.

Okay, wow, I feel similar to you and we both got married on the same day. Weird.

While I don't regret anything about my day, nor would I change any detail about it - I feel like it flew by and I am actually having trouble remembering it. (This is why I am so happy I had videographers!) I don't feel like it actually happened, and that makes me a little sad. I look at pictures, and I don't really remember being there. It was perfect, but it's like my mind blocked it out or something.

I put so much effort into everything, it all went as planned, it was the best wedding I could ever have imagined, so why is this happening? (The only thing that disappointed me, however, was my flowers. I'm not going to go into why until I receive a response to a letter that I wrote my florist.)

I keep thinking I should have worn my hair or makeup differently (and hired a makeup artist that worked faster so I wouldn't miss half an hour of my time slot at Old Westbury Gardens...) or worn my veil further back on my head, but my husband thinks I looked amazing, so that's all that matters!

Maybe you should make a list of the positives from your wedding and focus on those rather than on things you can't change. If you weigh the things that you loved about the day against the things that you didn't love so much, maybe you'll feel better...

Thanks for the comforting words. I know you're so right, there were so many things that were amazing about that day. I married my love and that is what counts. I guess I put so much of myself into the planning and did so many DIY projects on my own, it was hard to let go.

I'm so happy that I had a videographer because I don't remember anything!!! I have to look at my finger and remind myself I'm actually married. I'm sure once I get my pictures and video I'll feel better.

Don't be depressed. I am sure your wedding was awesome and everyone enjoyed it. Instead of focusing on the wedding you have a hubby to focus on and your life together! That is way more exciting then planning a wedding.

In my case I am so happy it is done and over with. It was to much stress for me working full time and going to school at night.

This is actually the reasons I want to get my albums all finished, thank yous all done, and a completed video.

I want to have the video so I can see all the things I missed. Though I am a bit scared of seeing it becuase of some minor issues we had and I am worried when I watch it, it will just make me mad, but hey what can you do.

Also, once all the albums and thank yous are all done and I don't have to keep looking at the proofs I won't think about the details of the wedding and how I could have done some stuff different. I can just enjoy being married!

It is definitly not easy transitioning from planning a wedding to being married, but don't worry you will have a video and photos to remind you of your day whenver you want, time will pass where you don't dwell on your wedding day details, and a husband who will love you forever.

Congratulations on the start of your married life.

I felt exactly the same way! It takes time to get used to not planning a wedding anymore lol...but you'll be fine...your wedding day was amazing and you did what you could and thats it. It was special in its sole purpose - you married the man of your dreams and that is the most important thing. You'll notice as you look back in a couple of months that everything came out truly amazing and you'll be satisfied with the way you've planned it...I promise!

I promise it will get better!! It takes time but it will happen
I think it's only natural to 2nd guess all of the little details but like someone else said, what is important is that you are now married to the man of your dreams!!
When you get your pictures back that will probably help you remember some of it, too!

hehe I feel the same in a way. Before the wedding I could not wait for it to be over, but now I find myself kinda lost and wanting to still plan a bit. I enjoyed myself at my wedding, but now in retrospect I wish I could have spent some more time with friends and family., everything just seemede to go so fast.

wow.. i thought i was the only one missing the planning! I would love to do it all over again...and definitely have a day of coordinator this time! there were so many countless moments that I wanted to ring someone's neck (in between pics of course) b/c they were pissing me off and things weren't going the way i expected (photographer got lost from the church to Giorgio's, my in laws were driving me nuts, someone from 'his side' kept stepping on my mom's dress as they entered and exited the limo so it ripped a couple of times-thank goodness for my emergency sew kit, i can go on and on)...but for some reason I was the only one who felt this way b/c my DH husband and everyone else thought everything was wonderful...

I totally feel like the wedding was a great dress rehearsal and NOW I am ready for the real thing.

I SOOOOOOOOOOOO want to either do it over or turn back time

Now that I know what I know, I would do things differently. I don't mean little things, I mean booking different vendors, having a different plan for the day, all of that.

Also, DH had sprained his ankle shortly before so we couldn't do a choreographed first dance.

AND my band leader had LIED to me and came clean RIGHT BEFORE bridal party intros and I was MAJORLY PISSED from that point on.........even though I struggled to enjoy myself anyway, it was a struggle to keep myself focused instead of crying my eyes out.

ETA: Plus, time seemed to be moving at WARP SPEED that day. I felt so out of control with no watch on and being encumbered in that huge dress. Couldn't run around like I normally do. Wish I had much more time to speak to guests, but because we ran late, we had to take pix during cocktail hr. I couldn't stand it!

The band also was late setting up and delayed our entrance about 20-25 mins!!!!!! (so we probly didn't get in til 8;40/8:45 instead of 8:20p)

About getting the pics back... I had the opposite experience. I loved and enjoyed every moment of my wedding, but since I got my proofs back and I get obsessed and sad over things I see in the pics that I wish I could have done differently, aka. my hair, certain poses, veil placement, dress alterations. The day of, though, I LOVED it all. Weird, right? I think when looking at pics I am hypercritical of myself. Even in my own digital camera, if I hate a pics I erase it forever.

I just curious why you say you didn't enjoy your day. Were you very nervous or anxious and that stopped you from having fun?

I don't think I was nervous more as everything flew by so quickly and I never really got to absorb and take in everything. We never got to really enjoy the cocktail hour and I never got to really spend time with my guests, and so many of they came from so far away. I'm just waiting till our 5th anniversary and we're having a biker wedding, maybe then we'll really get to enjoy it. I guess being my own coordinator kept me from really just letting go because I had to make sure everything was taken care of, instead of us being taken care of.

I don't regret anything, it's just sad to not remember anything and wishing I had the time to enjoy the reception more than we did. It just felt so rushed.

a biker wedding?

what's that? I am intrigued........

I totally agree with you about still having to coordinate day-of........My main regret is not getting a day of coordinator.

I missed talking to so many people who I rarely get to see.

I was actually relieved when the wedding was over... I was tired of all the planning - i had a ball on my wedding day, but yes it went by sooo fast - I was so happy to get my video recently - I was like - oh yeah - i remember that....

But, the most exciting thing? I was married! The party is like whatever - its fleeting - the marriage is what you get to keep forever!!!

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Posted by jaws1013

I heard about brides become despondant after the wedding, but this is ridiculous. I want to go back and do it all over again. I feel like I really didn't enjoy the day. It was over so quickly. Am I crazy or is it that I am so bored now at work with no wedding planning to do that it's getting to me.

My guests said they loved it, but I keep feeling I could have done better. Am I alone in this? What's weird is that this is coming from someone who grew up never wnating to get married... unreal I know.

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you're not alone. i keep wanting to do it all over again with all the things i learned along the way.