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from your maiden name!?
I just spent the afternoon changing my name at Social Security (I wanted to go in person) and DMV and I feel like I lost my best friend!!
I had that name for almost 36 years! I like it better than his! Hee Hee!
Seriously, though, it means so much to him that I took his name, I know I'll get over it. It's definitely harder than I thought it would be!
:)
I just did the same thing....last night at DMV and this morning at Social Security and I thought to myself...I will never be known as Lisa S anymore!! Its been 36 years for me too...but Im sure that I will get used to it!
Lisa
PS...how is everything else going??
Just thought I'd offer another perspective...I thought that I'd feel strange about using my husband's name, but I don't at all. In fact, I am sometimes surprised by how natural it rolls off my tongue when I introduce myself to new people.
I love my married name. Changing my last name doesn't make me feel like I've lost 'me.' I know some other girls do feel that way, but I don't really understand it. It would be different if you changed your first name.
The only things I have with my married name are my marriage certificate and my season ski pass. I havent changed my name professionaly or on any official documents yet. Actually I am still undecided about changing.
I changed my name and I'm still undecided! :)
Up until yesterday the only thing I had with my married name was my marriage certificate and a COSTCO card - which my husband took GREAT pride in requesting before we were married and even more pride in presenting it to me! Seems as though I should be honored! LOL
I'm still wondering if I should have hyphenated like my 2 sisters did...
My mom tells me, 'I was proud to take your father's name when we got married'...well, it was 1957 and she was 20!!! I'd say times have changed a bit! HAHA!!
Good luck with whatever you decide!
:)
I had my maiden name for 20 years and then switched to my married name. I had that name for 22 years then went back to my maiden name (mostly to spite my ex..that is a long story). Had my maiden name again for 3 years and now am switching to my new husbands last name. So in a period of about 4 years I have had 3 different last names. I have yet to change my driver's license or social security card, or any credit cards and am still using my maiden name at work. My husband doesn't care what name I use as long as we are married, but to be honest it gets confusing. I was recently in the hospital and for insurance purposes I needed to use my married name. Well I filled out all the papers using my maiden name and they had no idea who I was..DUH!!! Guess it is time for me to be either one or the other!!!
Kept my maiden name professionally..which includes
health insurance, Bank account( direct deposit)
and my married name for 'casual time':
One credit card, Group/\.club affliations,
magazines. drivers license
Hyphenated for SS card...just to cover the bases...
Before we got married, and when we were engaged, I thought I wouldn't care about changing my name, and that I would do it immediately. Well, we've been married for just over a year now, and I STILL haven't done it. I find it's really hard to do. I want to keep my promise to him to do it, but I'm finding that I don't want to change my identity. So, I might just hyphenate my name professionally, and change it personally (but not just yet)...
I intended to keep my name and then it kind of became a deal w/ my husband. So after some researching (I hadn't put my 'new' name on hte marriage certificate) I found out that once you're married, you can use his name or not. So I've just tacked his name on after mine (no hyphen). I do feel a little odd, like I had to give something up. I told him that we should have made a whole new last name by combining both our names. He wasn't too keen on that. Funny it's ok for women to change their names, but very few men change theirs... Oh well. My advice is if you have reservations, don't change you name. I more often than not wish I hadn't. I know my husband would have gotten over it if I'd chosen to keep my maiden name.
... the last name of your children (when and if)?
That might be when it gets confusing. Any thoughts?
I actually went from a nice easy name to one that is ridiculous to spell. However, it makes me so happy to use it, even at times when it causes confusion. Although I understand the reservations about losing your identity - especially in your career - I kind of wanted to be identified with my husband in a new and special way. Which sounds kind of lame, I guess but to me it was part of the deal! I think everyone should do whatever they are most comfortable with...
I am using both too and am getting very confused on when I should use mine, his or both. Its not hyphenated, more like a middle name. Now I'm thinking its more trouble than its worth to keep my name in the picture!
That's how I use mine too. More as a middle name. I mostly use it on legar documents & when I sign my name. Otherwise it does get confusing.
I think my husband is a little upset that I didn't take his name - but I don't feel it is fair to have to give up my name. I am just as proud of my history - as he is of his -
As an example - b/c my mother took my fathers name I always thought of myself as the last name I was given - and I don't feel a stong connection to my mothers maiden name (I want my children to feel like they are both)
I am finding it harder than I expected. It means alot to him for me to change it so I am. I can say it but have not changed my ID to it. I definitly feel like I am changing my identity which in a way it is.
Your name is how others know you.
Eventually I am just going to spend the time and change it all at once it is getting confusing having some things in my maiden name and other in my married.
Just my thoughts.
I agree with you COMPLETELY, which is why we agreed (after some prodding and family interference) that we would hyphenate and create a family name...It's long as hell, but it's mine & his hyphenated HE took my name too so now we are BOTH Smith-Parks (example) and his family hated it b/c they wanted the kids to have their last name etc, etc, but in the end he held his ground and at our wedding we were announced Ayanna & Chip Smith-Parks and it was VERY KOOL!!!
Ayanna-Nubride
