I didn't invite guests expecting gifts...of course, having them share our day with us is what made our wedding so special. I'm worried, though. Did we misplace a card?
Anyone in the same boat? What did you do????
Cindy
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
We had two guests that didnt give gifts. They are both sisters and came with their husbands so it was four people that came with no card or anything. At over 200 dollars a plate and walking out with a bottle of wine as a favor, I was totally shocked that people do this. Personally, I think it is rude and illmannered to not give any gift at all. I wasnt looking for gifts, but how do you go to a wedding and not give a gift? What I did was, this person sent a shower invite to my house. When I responded to the shower I told her that we had people that gave us cards and they were stolen (even though that didnt happen). I told her I wanted to warn her incase she gave us a check so she could stop the check. She said they didnt give a gift and were planning on having something for us when we got home from our honeymoon. I got married three months ago and there is nothing from her. From what I know now about people, there were not cards stolen at your wedding. It is hard to understand, but those people didnt give you a gift.
Latina511
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
I lucked out, everybody that came to my wedding gave a gift. There were a few that didn't give much but I understand there situaton and its the tought that counts. I believe you should at least give some kind of gift when going to a wedding, it is rude not to. My FH kept joking during the planning that for those who didn't give gifts he would send them a bill for there plates. He is always kidding around though.
NovemberSue
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
We had a few guests who came to the reception and didn't even give us a card. We don't even want to send them a 'thank you'. We also don't expect much from people but no card,thats so rude. We also had people not show up at all.
Cindy
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
That is how I feel. It is not the monetary value of the gift, but to not even have five minutes to get us a card to say congratulations is just rude. I am not sending thank yous to those people. That is just my personal opinion and it is something that is very hard for me to do.
NovemberSue
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
The people who couldn't even give us a card should send us a thank you.
anne
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
We got married in October and we had a few people not give a gift -- We have had a few gifts trickle in afterwards (some from people who could not attend the wedding)...
What I don't understand is the people who could not even send a card!!! That is just plain rude
Cindy
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
Novemberbride, I totally agree with you. My poor husband couldnt come to terms that these people didnt give us even a card. I am doing my thank yous right now and if someone didnt even give us a card to congratulate us, there is NO WAY they are getting a card from me. The people that didnt give a card, he has gone to plenty of b-day functions and anniversary functions in backyards and gave very generous gifts.
ss2002
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
Thanks for the advice, everyone. Like you all...I can't believe that people would attend a wedding and not bring even a card. I saw a friend who did not give a card or gift yesterday...I was really hoping she'd mention something, but she didn't.
One couple who attended the wedding sans card just sent us a note announcing the birth of their daughter. Now what? Do I go tit-for-tat and not send a baby gift??? Or do I just rise above it all and send a gift/card as I normally would????
sigh
MSCJLK
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
Send a card with a very small gift. Like just $10 worth...thats it...
edited to say: My dad put his tux on a year after my wedding and found a card and a check in his pocket that was a gift from my Wedding...and we did not even notice that we did not get a gift from this person...
SOmetime you never know....
dkga1026
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
we had a couple of people who didn't bring a card or gift....not sure what i'll do yet...i might send a thank you b/c they did come and it's not about the gifts....but i'm not sure that i would send a gift for their events to come, maybe just a card...
Cira
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
For me, it would depend on my relationship with the person. If she is a close friend and I wanted her friendship in my life, then I would probably send either a small token or just a card to say congratulations. Either way, a card is a nice gesture ... hey, she got a free dinner at your wedding - there's her gift! Oh how bad!
michele31
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
I will send each guest a thank you EXCEPT my FIL regardless of whether or not they gave us a card/gift. My FIL didn't even give us a card or even so much as a verbal thank you. He is just a rude person. I didn't even have to include him since my DH's parents are divorced and he never sees his dad. He didn't RSVP to our event until a few days before when he called to ask DH where to get his hotel room. I didn't even write out a Christmas card for him. I am not like his children who just accept his behavior as 'that is just him'. Tough. And for the others who RSVPd that they WERE coming and didn't: those people will not even get a Christmas card from us. They cost me a lot of money and didn't even have the manners to call and cancel.
Scoop
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
We had about 6 guests who did not give gifts and/or cards. I thought this was very rude but since I have returned, I have already received cards from 3 of them. Technically, proper etiquette says they have a year to send you a gift. I myself, always give the card day of...but I guess some people don't mind.
michele31
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
I HIGHLY doubt that I will get a gift in 6 months from those who haven't sent one yet. And I think the 1 year rule was made when their was not air service shipments readily avaiable. It probably took a long time for a package to go from NY to CA.
dgtlsunshine
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
We did get a few gifts after the wedding. I thought the one year rule was alive and living
I do hope your guests send some gifts though. At least a card I think is in order.
verdila
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
We were married in sept. and we had 1 couple and two singles (total of 4 people) come to our wedding and not give us a card or a gift. One was a womanl I used to work with who brought a date, another one my husband's uncles who lives in GA and is not really close to the family (husbands mom has 6 siblings- all the others gave very generous gifts) but its been over 2 mos - and they say the gifts are coming but I'm not holding my breath. The fourth person is DH's friend. The thing is - how do I remain friends with the woman I used to work with- we still talk and email each other and she hasnt mentioned it now in a month. It's getting me very annoyed esp. since I gave her a very nice bday present last yr. I know she was having financial problems - she was laid off last yr and she was in 2 weddings around the same time as mine, but she is working again and has been for 6 mos. She couldve given me something small. I didnt even get a card from her!
michele31
Posted:
Member since
Re: Guest who didn't give gifts
I guess it all depends. Do you want to remain friends with this women or is the fact that she didn't give you a gift enough to end your friendship? That is a decision only you can make. If you do want to stop the friendship then just don't e-mail her back very quickly and stop at some point telling her that you are very hurt by her actions.
