Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

halloweenbride04 Posted: Nov 29, 2005 01:38 PM

Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

One of our GM did not give us a gift or card, we are married for over a year now so I highly doubt anything is coming our way. Well, this guy is getting married soon and of course we're going. I would NEVER go to a wedding empty-handed, in fact we tend to give generously. I can't help but but be bitter as I write the check to this couple. What would you guys do??

ShortBride Posted: Nov 29, 2005 02:13 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

I would give a gift, and then you can have the satisfaction of knowing that you are the better person. You can always get an actual gift off the registry rather than the typical 'plate cover' check

Mrs. dleeny Posted: Nov 29, 2005 02:15 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

I would probably make a donation to charity and include the info about it in his card.

Aga Posted: Nov 29, 2005 02:16 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

I would give a gift as well (no money or check)....

dpli Posted: Nov 29, 2005 02:21 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

Posted by ShortBride

I would give a gift, and then you can have the satisfaction of knowing that you are the better person. You can always get an actual gift off the registry rather than the typical 'plate cover' check

This is probably what I would do too.

brooklynbridezilla Posted: Nov 29, 2005 02:24 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

Posted by dleeny

I would probably make a donation to charity and include the info about it in his card.

I like that idea- who would have the balls to complain about a donation?

RVCBride Posted: Nov 29, 2005 03:02 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

I would do the donation as well! Your point will be made!

Mrs. dleeny Posted: Nov 29, 2005 03:18 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

Posted by brooklynbridezilla

Posted by dleeny

I would probably make a donation to charity and include the info about it in his card.

I like that idea- who would have the balls to complain about a donation?

exactly! and I would rather give the $ to the breast cancer foundation than to him

Soon2BMrsA Posted: Nov 29, 2005 03:32 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

Posted by Aga

I would give a gift as well (no money or check)....

ditto

BEANS Posted: Nov 29, 2005 04:55 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

Sorry to hijack, bu tyou guys are better than me. I would bounce the check so they would have to call me for it! Then I would ask where my gift was. The bounced check fee wouldn't bother me, I would enjoy their humiliation with the phone call. And if they don't call, well at least they had to pay the check fee also.

suven Posted: Nov 29, 2005 05:21 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

this is also a sticky one with us. We've pretty much given back the same gifts that we received from others. One, we were more generous. Another, we were less generous (because this couple's stupidity cost us money on our wedding day)

I've been asking DH what he wants to do about the non-gifters when it's their turn. For family members who didn't give a gift, we're going to give $150 from both of us. For friends, we're going to decline the invite.

lcherian Posted: Nov 29, 2005 07:37 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

Posted by BEANS

Sorry to hijack, bu tyou guys are better than me. I would bounce the check so they would have to call me for it! Then I would ask where my gift was. The bounced check fee wouldn't bother me, I would enjoy their humiliation with the phone call. And if they don't call, well at least they had to pay the check fee also.

sorry i'm not a newlywed, but i laughed out loud when i read this!

BlondeJD Posted: Nov 29, 2005 07:55 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

Posted by brooklynbridezilla

Posted by dleeny

I would probably make a donation to charity and include the info about it in his card.

I like that idea- who would have the balls to complain about a donation?

You should donate it to the 'Human Fund'!

Do you all remember that Seinfeld episode where George didn't want to spend money on Christmas gifts, so he made out donation cards to a fake charity - the Human Fund?!

melissa8781 Posted: Nov 29, 2005 09:10 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

LMAOOO!!

LO13LO13 Posted: Nov 30, 2005 03:43 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

i would go with a registry gift

nferrandi Posted: Dec 01, 2005 11:20 AM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

I would probably only give $150-200 when we normally give $300.

oakslady Posted: Dec 02, 2005 07:36 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

i like the donation to charity - then at least you have money going someplace worthwhile

personally if it was me i wouldnt give him a darn thing - payback is a B * T C H

May05Bride Posted: Dec 02, 2005 07:40 PM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

I would give a gift, but not a 'generous' one. That way they can't complain since they got one where you didn't, but you can save some cash.

Tarae Posted: Dec 03, 2005 12:15 AM

Re: Haven't been here in a while but I have an etiquette question

I have to say I am very different in this area...to me, giving a gift is not as important as being at my wedding.

If everyone or most people send gifts and don't show up, I doubt any of us would have our dream weddings. So, to me I would rather they showed up empty-handed. If the come with gifts, it's only icing on the cake.