hi guys-feelin kinda blue

hi guys-feelin kinda blue

Hello everyone-
I know- what right do I have to feel blue- after just returning from our FABULOUS trip to Thailand...
but it gets me every time at this time of year.
And I know all those Stats about how the blues hit people this time of yr- hubby is in the mental health field..but somehow it doesn't always help.

What can I say? I miss my parents. Dad died in a freak accident when I was 20 and Mom died when I was 22...after fighting cancer for a year.
Bro calls when he wants.

I have been having a pretty demanding time at work forthe last 6 months..with layoffs, 9/11 and then more layoffs. Have to be GLAD I am working- even if it is until 9 at night in Manhatten.ARGH!

and the baby clock is ticking louder than b4.
Which way is up? hehe

The one thing I AM looking forward to is the 12 members of Robs family coming to our house for Christmas Eve. (Funny thing is all but 2 of them are Jewish!)
I know, I should be grateful. After all what a crummy, hard year we ALL are having.
But it is hard. It is true. You never forget those who are gone. You still feel the loss all these years later.

Sorry guys for dumping on you.

hi guys-feelin kinda blue

What right do you have? EVERY right...don`t deny your feelings!!! This is such a chaotic time of year, it`s no wonder we sometimes get all frazzled. I have been kinda blue, too, lately...overwhelmed with overtime at work (layoffs here, too!), school, the holidays, trying to keep up with the depressing news coverage...

But things have been picking up for me. I, too, am looking forward to having our big Christmas Eve dinner with family and friends over. It`s little things that I look forward to that keeps me going!

You went to Thailand!?!?!? Omigod, that sounds wonderful!!! I heard it`s gorgeous! What did you get to do and see???

hi guys-feelin kinda blue

phyl,
I know how you feel. I can`t seem to get in the xmas spirit. My husband and I are still having problems. Its been 7 weeks since the baby came. Things seem to be getting worse. We are going to try counseling after the holidays. He is still trying to decide if he should take the traveling job...I don`t think it will help our marraige but we have to pay the bills. It is so hard to get around and shop with the baby. The only family I have here is my mom and she is so menapausal and moody lately too! All my brothers and sisters live on the west coast and like yours they only call maybe once a year if that! My husbands family is another story. They are going through so much right now (divorce, sickness) and the worse thing...my husbands childhood friend who I have become close to, her mother is dying from cancer and they don`t think she will last til xmas. I am trying to support her the best I can but I am not sure if there is going to be any of me left for xmas! I too am sorry for dumping all this but just writing it has made me feel a bit better. Thanks for listening and know there is someone out here who knows exactly how you feel!

hi guys- Finding your Holiday Spirit

First let me start off by saying I think I know what you are all saying. I haven't been getting into the holiday spirit this year myself. I havent even pulled out the decorations - and I am a BIG holiday decorator. Still, I have been finding that the simple pleasures of the season have made me smile.

Its been a rough year with the last few monts being particulary hard. I have been beating myself up saying How Dare I Be Negative! I have so much to be thankful for. A New Husband, Wonderful Family and Friends, a job that pays our bills etc etc. But there is a cloud hanging around me too.

So watch Frosty - (that one did it for me). Sing songs, Beck look at the georgeous little baby of yours or whatever you need to find a little piece of your holiday spirit - But DONT Beat yourself up for not being in the 'holiday mood', this is not a 'normal' holiday season. We are individuald dealing with the world in our own individual way. So have a candy cane and relax.
Happy Holidays to All

Finding your Holiday Spirit (long)

I think it`s important for anyone who is feeling something to be able to share it. Sometimes sharing it, halves it. Sometimes just typing it out helps and knowing it`s not just you feeling that way. So many people have trouble with the holidays. It`s like you have to be 'jolly on command'. You look in store windows and see everyone shopping and I know I have many times wondered why I don`t have that holiday that they promise us exists on TV. Of course you are going to miss loved ones who have passed away, don`t deny yourself that. Phyl, you`re right, the missing doesn`t necessarily disappear with time. My father died 17 years ago and I still miss him. Then there is always this urgency to fit in as much as you can and it can be overwhelming...

Here are some thoughts, I hope it helps: (1) Like Fran said, try not beat up on yourself for not feeling jolly (2) Try to accept how people are (not what you expect of them-especially hard with family) (3) Focus on the more spiritual aspect of the holidays-what are you grateful for, not what you are unhappy with (4) Stay close to friends and family, let people know you are having a hard time. (5) Help someone else who is having a hard time. Getting out of your own head and own worries can make all the difference to you and the other person (6) Enjoy the small moments. I was at my husband`s firehouse for a Holiday party this past Saturday. They lost 4 guys on 9/11. It was heartbreaking and heartwarming to see the kids who lost their fathers going up to get their gift from Santa with smiles on their faces. The vision of their smiles has been really buoying my spirits the past few days, knowing that they can find some happiness this season despite their loss.

I wish you all happiness and peace.

Some other ways to find your spirit...

One of the best ways that I have found to cure the holiday blues is to spend some time giving to others less fortunate than you. There are so many ways to do that and not all of them are monetary. One idea is to visit a nursing home and spend an hour visting with someone who has no family close by. Read to them, share a joke or just talk to them. Not only will you make someone else's day, but I guarantee that you will leave feeling better. Spend some time serving at a soup kitchen. Make a donation to a food pantry. Buy some gifts for children who don't have much and stick them in a Toys for Tots box. Even a $2.99 gift from a discount store makes a difference to a child with nothing. Giving to others without expecting a single thing back can be the most rewarding experience imaginable and will make your heart and your soul soar! And you will truly find your Christmas spirit!!

hi beck- def have sympathic shoulders

seems like you have tons on your plate too. Hope that the couseling will help. Sometimes it just takes a netural party in the room to kinda diffuse the emotions and get to the problems.
I am with you there hon.
feel free to talk

i knew it!

thank you ladies for listening. Most of you brought me to tears- but maybe that is what I need.

I really truly am greatful for many things. G-d aboe has blessed us..we are alive, we are working (albiet very hard), we have a house, food, heat & water...and a kitty and 2 birds to share it with!
I will have 12 people on the eve to share it with- now maybe 2 others who really do not have the traditional meaning of a family. I love it when these guys come over.
and- I bought the 2 kids presents I needed last night after searching 3 stores! yay! All I would really want to get is maybe one thing for my hubby.


will continue plugging on, and maybe venting my energies during a BRISK walk tomorrow.
Haven't even decorated the tree yet- and I love doing that..so maybe that will help too.
Dunno- feel a little lost but will keep plodding on.
THANKS AGAIN! HUGS!

i knew it!

thank you ladies for listening. Most of you brought me to tears- but maybe that is what I need.

I really truly am greatful for many things. G-d aboe has blessed us..we are alive, we are working (albiet very hard), we have a house, food, heat & water...and a kitty and 2 birds to share it with!
I will have 12 people on the eve to share it with- now maybe 2 others who really do not have the traditional meaning of a family. I love it when these guys come over.
and- I bought the 2 kids presents I needed last night after searching 3 stores! yay! All I would really want to get is maybe one thing for my hubby.


will continue plugging on, and maybe venting my energies during a BRISK walk tomorrow.
Haven't even decorated the tree yet- and I love doing that..so maybe that will help too.
Dunno- feel a little lost but will keep plodding on.
THANKS AGAIN! HUGS!

Joy and Peace in 2002!

I think writing out your feelings can do a lot of good and this is a good place to share thoughts, fears and ideas. That's why we are here -- to help each other out.

It has been a difficult year for many -- my wish for all is that peace, joy, happiness and good things come our way next year. Think of it as a clean slate to start fresh with.

Maybe instead of Happy Holidays we should stress HAPPY NEW YEAR 2002! A new year to make wonderful memories.

WOW -- I really sound like a mush don't I? :-)