My husband and I are fighting about where we are going for Christmas Eve. We were going to go to my house christmas eve and then drive to his parents house for xmas day and then we will be spending a whole week with theml. That is not good enough for them. This is the email that my FIL wrote me:
We are a little hurt and upset with your Christmas plans. We thought that you were going to spend Christmas with us. We don't feel that Christmas afternoon with 25 other people is spending Christmas with us. We love you both very much and were looking to spending some quality time with you on Christmas eve and morning especially since Jason, George and Jackie are going to be there.
What the hell is that!
Suzannebride
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Re: Holiday Family Problems
Yikes. Maybe you can write back how you are looking forward and very happy that you will be able to spend time with them as your new family but you can't forget about your old family and you are so glad she can understand.
summer06bride
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Re: Holiday Family Problems
thats balls (excuse my language) i think you guys had it perfectly planned out
Kerrycec
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Re: Holiday Family Problems
Oh man, I'm sorry. We spend Christmas Eve & Morning with my family and then at like 12N we head to my MIL's house, open gifts with them, leave to go to my Aunts for about an hour, then head to dinner back at my MIL's. Its hectic but its works for us. When we have kids who knows...
angnick
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Re: Holiday Family Problems
wow that was rude.
you are spending a whole week with your in laws? You are a saint.
Tell her that you are trying to split the holidays as much as possible, and being that you are spending an entire week with them, christmas eve and morning with your family doesnt hurt.
isnt it called CHRISTMAS WEEK afterall?
ewickens
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Re: Holiday Family Problems
Posted by summer06bride
thats balls (excuse my language) i think you guys had it perfectly planned out
I agree! DH and I spend Xmas eve with my family and Xmas Day with his. Both families aren't always thrilled with it, but they're happy to at least be with us and spend time with us.
Your MILs e-mail is cruel! She should know better than say you have to spend your entire holiday with one side of your new family. Yours is equally as important.
moonlitee
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Re: Holiday Family Problems
Ouch....that was rude (on his part). I think the plans you and DH made are fair you are going to be a WHOLE WEEK with them. It's a tough adjustment and I think you are just going to have to tell them that you guys are married now and whatever plans you and DH makes they are going to have to accept. What are they expecting you to do not see your family at all??
MandG072909
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Re: Holiday Family Problems
Dude...I'd be so angry if my inlaws had the nerve to say that to me....holidays are the greatest test of the marriage as a comprimise theory... because our parents live in completely different states my DH and I have to choose to spend the entire holiday with one or the other family and IMO your inlaws should feel lucky that they are not in that situation and take what they get...If you spend more time with them it's less time w/ your family and how do they think that's fair to you....just explain it and I hope they come around
LaurenluvsTJ
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Re: Holiday Family Problems
that takes some nerve to write something like that! they need to understand that there are two families involved here.. how dare they think you are spending a whole WEEK with them and that you shouldnt have some of the holiday with your family!!
Aphrodite07
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Re: Holiday Family Problems
Thanks girls for all your advice. I hope my husband understands!
kbeana24
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s
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Ronkonkomonga
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Re: Holiday Family Problems
That was a terrible email.
You MUST put your foot down now - or your in laws will come to expect that you will do what they want if they lay on the guilt.
They put you in a bad spot, and it will be painful - but you have to push back. Your family is just as important. Try not to put your husband in the middle though - address them yourself.
We ALL go through this.
Calimali
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Re: Holiday Family Problems
wow... what a SELFISH email.... remind them that your family is JUST as important!!!
good luck with that! Holidays are always hard when both families love you so much.
