With many of us around our first year anniv...How has the first year been? What things did you have to adjust to?
Have you felt the 'newness' (butterflies and all of that) fade as you got into your routine schedules and/or dealt with stresses?
...How do you keep things fun/exciting/spontaneous?
PattyK
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Re: How do you keep things fun/exciting?
Our first year has been pretty good. We have had some stressful things to handle but DH has been like a rock. I think that what's going on has helped to make our relationship stronger. We lived together before getting married, so there was nothing that I had to get adjusted to. To keep things fun we have date night where we will either order in or cook together and then watch dinner. We also like to do driving and have started taking fun little day trips.
Aug07OFCbride
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Wow...look at all the responses, lol.
Well I'll share. Our year has been good as well, lots of happiness but definitely full of some trials and stressors (not marriage stuff but other stuff). We're just remaining faithful and trusting to the Lord in it, because he has helped us through alot these days. But I was also kind of reminiscing about how when we first started dating it was so exciting and spontaneous (of course)...there was also ALOT of build up bc we were dating long distance for so long, so when we finally got to see eachother it was like fireworks, so I was just thinking about how things change when you get into your routines together. It's wonderful but just different. I was just trying to brainstorm fun things we can do together. So if anyone has any fun ideas, pls share.
vmystique33
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Well since we have been together for 10 yrs before we got married we had to just get used to calling eachother hubby and wifey
davenjess
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i have to be honest - we didn't feel different at ALL once we were married....
We'd been together 5 years before we got engaged...so that could be it. This August is 6 years for us...i just call him husband and he calls me wifey (which makes me crazy)....but that's about it...
You do have to keep up with the 'dates' thing. I fully believe in that. that's something his mom told us a long time ago. do NOT let yourselves start taking advantage of each other.... Make time, once a month to date each other, like as if you were still just dating... It has made a difference for us!
MeNBobs
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we didn't live together until after the wedding so that was different for us. We had to adjust to each other. he is a neat freak and puts everything away (hides all of my stuff) but we have adjusted. I like having him around he is good at carrying all the heavy stuff, taking out the garbage and opening the pickle jars.
We also bought a house and have been working on it since the day we bought it. I like working together with him and slowly changing our house into our home. It;s not always fun working every weekend but the end result is very much worth it.
Sometimes the days are same old same old and then other times when i pull into the driveway I think I can't believe I own this and am married. It's a funny good feeling.
We make sure we go out on a date at least once a week. To keep things exciting I don't wear underwear.
HamptonsBride
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we've lived together for years before we got married...so not much changed...but i feel a deeper sense of committment and like we are truly in it for the long hall now...i still try and do thoughtful little things daily...like plug in his cellphone if he's forgotten...or leave him a post-it in his car if he's going on an interview...silly little things..
Aug07OFCbride
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Posted by MeNBobs
we didn't live together until after the wedding so that was different for us. We had to adjust to each other. he is a neat freak and puts everything away (hides all of my stuff) but we have adjusted. I like having him around he is good at carrying all the heavy stuff, taking out the garbage and opening the pickle jars.
We also bought a house and have been working on it since the day we bought it. I like working together with him and slowly changing our house into our home. It;s not always fun working every weekend but the end result is very much worth it.
Sometimes the days are same old same old and then other times when i pull into the driveway I think I can't believe I own this and am married. It's a funny good feeling.
We make sure we go out on a date at least once a week. To keep things exciting I don't wear underwear.
alright, ambre.
you crack me up- 'I like having him around he is good at carrying all the heavy stuff, taking out the garbage and opening the pickle jars.' hehe true, DH is good for these things too.
i think maybe what im feeling is like..alot of ppl transition into having a baby or buying a home and we are not prepared to do either just yet. i focus on my doctoral program but im on break right now so while its nice to get things down around the house im just feeling a lull or something...the whole planning and everything was exciting too and then we didn't transition into another focus. we're just kinda in our routine. he goes to work every day and yada yada. i dunno how to explain it clearly. i want to get back to the dates once a week tho. thats a good idea. i just need to be creative bc we are trying to get in a better financial situation and i dont want us to blow alot of money.
MeNBobs
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Re: How do you keep things fun/exciting?
Posted by Aug07OFCbride
i think maybe what im feeling is like..alot of ppl transition into having a baby or buying a home and we are not prepared to do either just yet. i focus on my doctoral program but im on break right now so while its nice to get things down around the house im just feeling a lull or something...the whole planning and everything was exciting too and then we didn't transition into another focus. we're just kinda in our routine. he goes to work every day and yada yada. i dunno how to explain it clearly. i want to get back to the dates once a week tho. thats a good idea. i just need to be creative bc we are trying to get in a better financial situation and i dont want us to blow alot of money.
I know what you mean about getting into a lull. In the winter especially it was so eay to get into that since it is so dark and cold. Even going out on a date gets boring if it constantly the same thing like going to dinner.
Now we try to find fun cheap things to do. The other night we walked along the boardwalk at the beach, sometimes we go window shopping, the bookstore is great I read all the magazines but never buy them . A few theatres have $5 movies on Tuesday.
I think a lot of the time it is always the grass is greener on the other side. We hated renting our apartment and couldn't wait to get a house now that we have the house we realize the apt was not so bad if we stayed in the apt we would have a lot more money and would actually be able to do stuff on the weekend....so just enjoy where you are now and try to make the best out of everyday. I know it is easier said than done. Soem situations if I didn't laugh I would cry but it's better to laugh it burns more calories. If all else fails take off your underwear .
Aug07OFCbride
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Re: How do you keep things fun/exciting?
thx for the input and ideas!
ill mix it up b/n dinners, movies, day trips. no undies, granny panties, thongs...etc.
honestly i dont think i had thought about any of this until yesterday and than I was like kinda feeling guilty about it, lol. but i realize its normal to go through diff phases. im just being silly.
GettinHutched
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Re: How do you keep things fun/exciting?
Posted by Aug07OFCbride
But I was also kind of reminiscing about how when we first started dating it was so exciting and spontaneous (of course)...there was also ALOT of build up bc we were dating long distance for so long, so when we finally got to see eachother it was like fireworks, so I was just thinking about how things change when you get into your routines together. It's wonderful but just different. I was just trying to brainstorm fun things we can do together. So if anyone has any fun ideas, pls share.
Jess, I often reminisce of the crazy, butterflies, hot for each other years too! We had the same situation, doing the long distance thing for 2 years. I often miss that excitement and anticipation of when we would visit each other. I would never want to go back to those painful goodbyes though!
I know exactly what you mean - but it's very natural to go from can't-keep-your-hands-off-each-other to getting stuck in routines. I could use the tips too!
It's really all part of life...I think the best thing couples do is to have plans without each other now and then. Have your girls nights, let him have his boys nights.
Aug07OFCbride
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Re: How do you keep things fun/exciting?
Posted by GettinHutched
Jess, I often reminisce of the crazy, butterflies, hot for each other years too! We had the same situation, doing the long distance thing for 2 years. I often miss that excitement and anticipation of when we would visit each other. I would never want to go back to those painful goodbyes though!
I know exactly what you mean - but it's very natural to go from can't-keep-your-hands-off-each-other to getting stuck in routines. I could use the tips too!
It's really all part of life...I think the best thing couples do is to have plans without each other now and then. Have your girls nights, let him have his boys nights.
thx so much, tara!! it definitely helps to know im not alone or that its not abnormal or something.
ligirlz
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I have to say nothing really changed i guess it had to do with living with each other for 1 1/2 years before we got married. We were also together got almost 8 years. We did have our usual ups and downs of a 1st year but learned to get through it.
