How would u feel in this situation ?

DH is the eldest son, so naturally im the eldest daughter in law...[ this matters because when time comes to shovel snow or run errands for Inlaws they are the first one to say oh u guys are the eldest n have more responsibility]
DH has another brother, who is married. His wife and are NOT BFF, but i have no problems with her, when we see each other its fine. DH's youngest brother...is a big f*ck up, not employed, smokes pot, not sure if he even finished college, still gets in to bar fights, random ugly tattoos and than regrets it and asks everyone to chip in $ so he can get them removed, the list goes on.... anyways i know that he likes some girl, shes apparently come over, met the whole family, and they've set an engagement date...and I DONT KNOW ABOUT ANY OF THIS!!!!!!!!!..... his now 'fiance' told me herself via text message. I speak to MIL once, or twice a week she never even mentions anything, if anything she pretends to HIDE all this stuff... so now this girl is telling me theyre gona have an engagement party when DH's father comes back from business errands hes running in Chicago which should be in a week.

I am going over to see Inlaws tommorow...should i mention anything?? or wait for them to say something.... my inlaws are so careless including DH brother...i mean this is such big news, the whole family apparently knows about it, except ME and DH..... wondering why they dont include their 'eldest' kids when it comes to GOOD news....

DH can care less about it, because he doesnt agree with anything his brother does, but im wondering if we'll even be invited to e-party

I wouldnt say anything......even though they are your IL's IMO its not your business how they ru their family....If anything your DH should say something.

I dont get involved with the inner workings of DHs family unless it is something that involves DH personally.

This is something I would leave for DH to discuss with his family

DH's family is the same way! nobody knows how to communicated with each other! DH's little sister is making her communion on saturday and we um yeah just found out yesterday!!

i would def say something, i would do it like 'OMG you didn't tell me that they were getting enegaged! how exciting' maybe she didnt say anything because shes not soo excited about it...especially cuz he doesnt have a job, etc...this is a somewhat new realationship too im guessing??

things like that wuold def bother me too! but i would def say something to MIL.

let us know what she says!! lOL

I have all to much experience with being the eldest daughter in law and irresponsible brother-in-laws.

I don't really have any advice for you, but I know how frustrated you must feel.

i always do say something.....but this time im gona try a NEW approach...and shut up! im going there tonight so lets see....
ugh wish me luck, that i dont come back SICK. I dont like goign to see MIL. She is RUDE!!!!