I'm depressed

I'm going through a really rough time right now and I'm not sure what to do about it. I'm really depressed because my job has gone to sh!t, and I have no idea what I want to do with my life. FH and I are not getting along at all and he doesn't seem to care about any of it- which is only further pissing me off. I know there's nothing any of you can do, I guess I just wanted to complain.

ETS- oh yeah, did I mention I quit smoking this week? I'm super on edge about that too.

That is AWESOME that u are going through that.

I know that sounds weird but it means you are Growing as a person. If you didn't care about anything or anyone you could keep going on as if nothing is wrong. But the fact that you are FEELING all these emotions and going through these changes is a good thing.

Eventhough it doesn't feel like it, when u get perspective on it you'll be able to tell yourself I am so glad I went through that b/c of all that I gained from that experience.

I know its hard I can hear/read it in your post

Know that you are not alone (especially with Li Weddings....LOL)

Getting married is a HUGE deal, planning the wedding is Huge....so there has to be an adjustment back to regular life

This is a chance to get to know yourself more. What r your hobbies. What do you like to do in your spare time? Is there something creative that you like, dancing, scapbooking, photography anything creative can really start to make you feel better.

Know that alot of people go through this hell we are all human right....So this to shall pass

It is good to vent that way you don't have to hold it all in.

Does your FH know what you are going through? Is he going through something of his own and that is why maybe he is having a hard time giving you what you need?

I would spin this and try EVEN THOUGH I KNOW IT IS HARD to and try and look at it like hey im human and i am going through an 'experience'

good luck and I know it will work itself out

Sorry to hear that. I know how it is to be unhappy at work. I was like that way for a longggg time. It's not fun. Your DH should be supportive of you, but maybe he doesn't understand how important this is to you. Have you talked to him?

Good luck, and things WILL get better

It sounds trite, but this WILL pass and things will get better.

I hope it happens soon!

things get tough.....and it's really hard
just be there for each other and you'll make it through!!!

My job is yucly too. This week as been ok, but the last few were awful-- I swore I was going to be fired, I was working really late. . .I am trying to read a bunch of 'what to do with your life' self help books, but they aren't really helping.

FM me if there is anything I can do. I knwo a whiel back we said we go out for lunch. We could both b!tch about our jobs!

It's so hard when you hate your job- I mean, it stinks having to be somewhere you hate for 8 hours a day! I know how you feel in that regard- I'm really unhappy at work now too!!

Don't feel pressured to figure our 'what you want to do with your life'.....I just turned 30 (ahhh!) and I have no idea what would REALLY make me happy in my career. I broke it down into smaller things- what i want for pay, location- and what job i would be OKAY with for now. Hopefully, I can make a change soon!

You'll find a new job and be happier- just don't feel like you're 'stuck' because you're not!

If you are really feeling this way in a few days, I would suggest talking to someone. I went through an awful past few months at work and it was spilling over to my personal life, fighting with my FH so I decided to start therapy. It really has helped and made me realize that I wasn't standing up for myself in a positive way.

Thank you all so much for you words of encouragement! I know you're right that this will pass, but for the time being I'm pretty miserable. And to answer some of you, yes FH knows that I'm going through a rough time and we've spoken about it and he's simply not being supportive or encouraging, which is just making me want nothing to do with him right now. He was unemployed for 10 months before we got engaged, and I did everything I could to help him and build his confidence. All he seems to be doing is tearing mine down.
I keep coming up with things that I could potentially be happy doing and he doesn't think I should/could do any of them. A while ago I wanted to go back to school to be a teacher. He said that he doesn't think I'm patient enough to be a teacher. I said that maybe I should look into being a travel agent. He said that was stupid and I would never be happy doing that. I don't know why he's being so negative, but it's just making me feel like sh!t and like I'm incapable.

I went through this too....still do at times. I have a BA degree, started a Masters and never finished (I only started because EVERYONE in my family said I needed to) and now at times, I feel worthless and stupid. I've been in GA since July and I'm on my 3rd job. Can you believe it?

DH is going back to school which is more important right now for the future.

Anyway.....I'm sure your DH cares, he just doesn't want to talk about it which he thinks talking about it would further your depression. Does he know how down you feel?

Find what works for you and follow your heart.

You will get through this. I know it's hard. I'm unhappy with my job also and DH doesn't understand it. He has his own problems at work too. Try talking to him. We're here if you need us.

I feel kinda the same way. I like my job and I like what I do, but I just feel like it is a worthless job to the world. I want to do something I can look back on and say I amde a difference in the world. Right now I am really confused. I want to go back to school to be a nurse, but Ray says the same things like your husband 'You want to be around death all day' No, I want to help people LIVE. And since I already have my BS in biochemistry I only need to go back 1 year full-time for my second bachelors in nursing. But he seems to think it is not important because he has a good job.
I feel like everything was put on hold because of the wedding and then us buying a house. Last week we talked about it and now he understands how I feel and wants me to do what will make me happy. it is a tough situation to be in. Hang in there.

You will get through this, give it alittle bit of time. Its normal to feel this way at times - Listen to yourself and follow your dreams, make a list of pros and cons and dicuss it together with DH and discuss how your feeling - let him know whats important to you and also listen to his point of view - Being at a job you don't like it tough, but there are many opportunities out there and agencies that can help you and give you guidance.

If your job sucks... that will continue to bring you down.

Get your resume out.. and go on a little job search. It may take your mind off the current issues going on. And who knows... you might land a better job!

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Posted by DjPiLL

If your job sucks... that will continue to bring you down.

Get your resume out.. and go on a little job search. It may take your mind off the current issues going on. And who knows... you might land a better job!

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I'm presently on the hunt! I'm actually going to try to get out of the newspaper business and go a new direction. I'm applying for anything and everything that seems remotely interesting.

Take it easy on yourself!! The first week of quitting smoking is the toughest and definitely susceptible to a rollercoaster of emotions -- depression being the a strong one.

You may not realize it, but quitting affects your mood quite aggressively at first. Don't be surprised to find yourself bursting into tears over the tiniest thing. Day four was the hardest for me, I'll never forget it.

I'm not saying that it's ALL from quitting.
I understand that you aren't thrilled with your job right now so that isn't helping, and you probably are going through a little wedding withdrawal, but these things are exacerbating the feeling of depression that naturally comes along with quitting. Plus - you're already on the job hunt (good luck!) and you are planning an anniversary party!

So what I'm saying is, cut yourself ALOT of slack these next few days. Unlike what you said -- You are doing something VERY VERY important right now for your health, your DH's health (did he quit too?), and your future family's health. Everyday that you don't smoke is an important accomplishment. So stick with it and, trust me, you don't need to take on anymore 'important' tasks for the moment. And you will see how rewarding this one is.

Good luck!!!

I was also going to say that your emotions about this are probably magnified because you are trying to quit smoking. Just try to get through the few weeks of that before making any long term plans, it is such a tough thing to do.

If it helps, I decided right before my 30th birthday to change careers. I already had a BA and an MA, but the job I had was not really doing it for me anymore. This required me to go back to school and get a second Bachelor's degree, since the new career I was considering was unrelated to what I was doing. It was a long road, but I have never regretted doing it. The day is SO long if you are unhappy at work. Have you thought about seeing a career counselor or life coach? They may be able to help you look at your talents and goals and come up with a good plan. Good luck and hang in there.

Maybe your DH was feeling insecure for a while about his own career.....now he sees you really motivated and maybe it makes him feel a little insecure again? That might be why he seems somewhat resistant to you making a change.....

But you should be proud of yourself- all in one year, getting married, quitting smoking, looking to make a career change! All really positive but all really big and overwhelming things!

I feel your pain re: the quitting smoking. I just quit on NEW YEARS EVE..I still think about having one..it's so hard and makes me edgy too!!

Re: the job situation, I am in the same boat..I am currently comfortable at my job. I love the people, but hate the work. It's taking me FOREVER to finish up my Elem Ed. masters. I feel like I am never going to teach and when I do, I am going to be an old bag.

Just remember that now is the time in your life that the most changes are going to occur..things will fall into place eventually..