Is anyone else having a hard time changing their name???

I'm having ALOT of internal conflict about this, that I never thought I'd have. I don't really want to hyphenate b/c we have children so I want us all to have the same last name. I've waited a long time for this wonderful man and to be married but I never thought in a million years I would feel this way!
I guess it's b/c I'm a little older and established in my career and so on and, HELLO, it's been my identitiy for over 30 years!!. DH was so happy that I would be taking his name & he asks me EVERYDAY if I've gone to DMV and SS. Mind you, I have NO excuse, the DMV is right across from my job. I feel so guilty, but I have discussed this with him & he tells me to do whatever I feel comfortable.

Sigh

Anyone else feel this way?

i felt weird at first. i kinda felt like i was betraying my family in some way. lol. but i knew it was b/c i just wasn't used to it. i knew that i wanted to change my name so i just made it seem like it was something i HAD to do. i was the same way tho. it weirded me out...but i think the longer you wait, the harder it will be. so you know you want to do it, just do it!

I love it. I get to be a WHOLE NEW PERSON.

but then again, I'm weeeeeeeeeeeird.

It's taken some getting used to for me, I really wanted to take DHs name and filed the appropriate paper work the right away.

But the sound/look of my name is still strange to me. I don't feel i have lost my identity by changing my name, but I do plan to include my maiden name on quilts I make or anything else that has the potential to last past my generation. I think lineage is interesting - I'll never forget my maiden name, and I don't want anyone else to either

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Posted by carolinep24

I love it. I get to be a WHOLE NEW PERSON.

but then again, I'm weeeeeeeeeeeird.

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I feel the same way. I mean my name changes but Im still me. Most of my close friends and fam know me as 'jenn' anyway, not as Jenn+my last name. So i'm still just Jenn+new last name. But when i get introduced I say Hi I'm Jenn or Jennifer so maybe lol I just wasnt so attached to my last name. I always think of that quote...

'Being born in a barn doesn't make a man a horse.'

Changing my name doesn't change who I am-just makes me even more a part of Dh's life and 'his' in a way that makes him love me even more. -shrugs- or could be like Caroline said lol and I'm just weird.

I had a hard time with changing my name.
I felt a little sad when I changed it!
I felt i was losing a part of me.
But its been almost a year since we said our I do's.....and i'm happy to have his name.


Do it when you are ready! It will feel right for you then.

Honestly I had and am having a hard time with it. Dh gave me such a hard time when I told him I would hyphen it and so I gave in and completely changed it and searously feel like I am loosing my identity. I was born with that name and that name is me I completelty understand what you are saying here are so

I kept my name...but don't really like it when people call me Mrs. Husband's name...so i can only imagine how hard it is to actually change it...

I didn't mind changing my name. People can usually pronounce this name without any trouble unlike my maiden name which was mispronounced all the time. Something about telemarketers though they can never get it right.

I liked my maiden name because it started with a B and i was always first for yearbook photos in school. My poor future children with an M last name wll have yearbook photos after recess and they will have awful hair

OMG i had this same convo with FH today ...i totally understand how you feel ...i thoguht i would never have this problem until we start talking about it ....then i started to think people might think we;re not married cuz i will have a different last name than him and the kids and if i hyphenate my name will be soooooooooooooooooooo huge ......its already long as it is

this is soo cute
.......i never thought about this too
My poor future children with an M last name wll have yearbook photos after recess and they will have awful hair

I totally understand where you are coming from. I was looking forward to it while we were engaged and then when he kept asking me after we were married I was torn. I'm in the same boat as you because we have a son who has his last name and I'm always referred to as 'Justin's Mom' at the doctors office and stuff so I was like well this will be nice to all have the same last name finally. I've done it in bits and pieces...lol. I changed my name and email at work and I'm slowly going to make my way to SS and DMV. sllloooowwwlllyyyyy

Yes, I understand. I kept my name. DH and I are from different cultural backgrounds and I wanted to retain evidence of my cultural heritage. Even if we were from the same background, I think I'd want to keep it because I want to retain my personal identity.

Although DH would have ideally liked me to change my name or at least hyphenate, he has accepted my decision not to change it.

This is a difficult and personal decision. Good luck.

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Posted by SylvieB

I'm having ALOT of internal conflict about this, that I never thought I'd have. I don't really want to hyphenate b/c we have children so I want us all to have the same last name. I've waited a long time for this wonderful man and to be married but I never thought in a million years I would feel this way!
I guess it's b/c I'm a little older and established in my career and so on and, HELLO, it's been my identitiy for over 30 years!!. DH was so happy that I would be taking his name & he asks me EVERYDAY if I've gone to DMV and SS. Mind you, I have NO excuse, the DMV is right across from my job. I feel so guilty, but I have discussed this with him & he tells me to do whatever I feel comfortable.

Sigh

Anyone else feel this way?

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We have been Married for 6 Months, & I haven't changed my name yet. On our Marriage License, I Hyphenated.....My Last Name Means the World to me.
DH does not understand. But I am standing my Ground, & I plan on Hypenating & will change my Name when I feel like it.

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Posted by HamptonsBride

I kept my name...but don't really like it when people call me Mrs. Husband's name...so i can only imagine how hard it is to actually change it...

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Ditto..Drive's me nuts too

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Posted by luvmyhoney

I totally understand where you are coming from. I was looking forward to it while we were engaged and then when he kept asking me after we were married I was torn. I'm in the same boat as you because we have a son who has his last name and I'm always referred to as 'Justin's Mom' at the doctors office and stuff so I was like well this will be nice to all have the same last name finally. I've done it in bits and pieces...lol. I changed my name and email at work and I'm slowly going to make my way to SS and DMV. sllloooowwwlllyyyyy

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Yeah, well I FINALLY went to DMV. bu that's it so far. Yeah, I will do everything in my time I guess. But then I'm thinking bank accounts, credit cards, work, etc. What a PITA!!!! We go through all the stress of planning the wedding and then have to do all this??? Boy, it's good being a man!

I always thought I'd have no problem changing my name - I come from a family where my older brother has our father's last name, I have our mother's and my younger brother has HIS father's (my stepdad's) last name.

So my mom has 3 children from 2 husbands but we all have different last names! I love that my mom and I have the same last name but I always used to wish we were just the _______ family (like the Smith or Johnson or whatever Family). So I know I want to have the same last name as my children and will change my name... but I am finding it SOOOOO hard to actually do! I don't want to lose my last name! I'm actually considering getting rid of my middle name, putting my maiden as my middle, and taking DH's last name.

But I heard that's a long process. So I'll probably just change my last name. But I'm not sure I'm ready yet, lol.

i have started the process to change my name, but it hard to do ,