Esp when the first marriage was in 2004 and ended in 2006. And this new guy happened fast met in summer 08, getting married this year. AND they have a house! I am not trying to be a complainer but feel annoyed. I was ok with the bachelorette party but now this is just getting ridiculous!!! Its a good friend and I am supposed to go out of town that weekend! Argh!
lizzie217
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Re: Isnt is a faux pau
If you feel that way, don't go, problem solved
MrsInglima
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Re: Isnt is a faux pau
I see your point as a guest, and I would probably feel the same exact way. But to play devil's advocate, she's probably thinking 'this is for real this time' so it's important for her to have all the same stuff and make it special. I'd spend less money on the gift. Fortunoff's is going out of business...
ChristineAaron08
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Re: Isnt is a faux pau
Yes, I think its kinda like having a 2nd baby shower.
I would go away and send a little something, but not like I would for the first shower.
What could they possibly need. DH and I had an apt before we got married and we didnt 'need' much for the shower.
Butterfly123
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Re: Isnt is a faux pau
Eh I dont see it as a big deal. She's also gonna get monetary gifts all over again so some people might consider that unfair also. But its a new beginning for her. I wouldnt judge her for her first marriage ending so quickly. Ish happens and who knows what the circumstances were. This might me the ONE this time.
EsquireBride
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Re: Isnt is a faux pau
I was sort of in this situation - I am DH's second wife. I wound up having a very small shower. Just remember that just because your friend is having a second marriage doesn't mean the significant other has ever gotten lots of presents and been part of these traditions. Luckily for me everyone turned out to be very happy and generous.
FinallyMrsB18
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Re: Isnt is a faux pau
just go out of town..tell them you already have plans booked...
MnM182008
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Re: Isnt is a faux pau
I've been invited to so many 2nd wedding showers. I am not a fan, and if it were me I wouldn't want another shower. I find it very annoying some people go all out do an engagement party, than a bridal shower, than the bachlorette party, its like come on already. The worst is if you are asked to be in the bp twice.
I think if its a close friend, just send a nice enough gift, and go out of town.
kirstenjk
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Re: Isnt is a faux pau
I agree with everyone else - send a nice, small gift along with your regrets and have a wonderful time on your weekend away.
Kimbalina
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Re: Isnt is a faux pau
Posted by kirstenjk
I agree with everyone else - send a nice, small gift along with your regrets and have a wonderful time on your weekend away.
ITA!
I think it is a bit much.
lizzie217
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Re: Isnt is a faux pau
Posted by Kimbalina
Posted by kirstenjk
I agree with everyone else - send a nice, small gift along with your regrets and have a wonderful time on your weekend away.
ITA!
I think it is a bit much.
BUT if it was my good friend I don't think I would think it was a bit much, I would just be happy for her, ya know? And if was someone I wasn't that close to I would decline and send something small, JMO Im picturing one of my close friends and I know that if god forbid they divorced I would just be happy they found love and were finally happy
CD516
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Re: Isnt is a faux pau
Ive been to 2 second showers in the last year or so. Personally, i would never do it. I just couldnt see inviting all the same people to another shower. That being said, i can understand why they had them. It was their DH's first time and their DH's sisters and mothers and cousins wanted to have one. ALso, their DH hadnt gotten all the gifts already. My best friend recently got divorced and if she were to get remarried and have another shower, i would be thrilled for her! I guess it depends on the person too. If i were you , i would definitely send a small gift.
RadiantBride
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Re: Isnt is a faux pau
I would get a smaller gift. If I was close to the person then I would get them something that I know is needed. (Only because the first marriage was not that long ago).
Mici n KC
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Re: Isnt is a faux pau
Is it her FH's family that's doing all this planning? If he has never been married before, this makes sense. If you can't go, you can't go. She's your friend and she's marrying the man she loves. It's not like she's re-marrying the other guy. It's a new beginning for them and her past marriage shouldn't affect it.
