Newlyweds
A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks.
>The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on
>the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife,
>'Honey, I'll be right back.'
>
>'Where are you going, coochy cooh?' asked the wife. 'I'm going to the
>bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer.' The wife said, 'You want
>a beer, my love?' She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed
>him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries:
>Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
>
>The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could
>think of saying was, 'Yes, lollypop...but at the bar...you know...they
>have frozen glasses...'
>
>He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him
>by saying, 'You want a frozen glass, puppy face?' She took a huge beer
>mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just
>holding it.
>
>The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, tootsie roll, but at the
>bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I
>won't be long, I'll be right back. I promise. OK?'
>
>'You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh?' She opened the oven and took
>out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in
>blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
>
>'But my sweet honey... at the bar... you know... there's swearing,
>dirty words and all that...'
>
>'You want dirty words, Dickhead? Drink your ******* beer in your
>goddamn frozen mug and eat your motherfucking snacks, because you are
>married now, and you aren't going anywhere! Got it, *******?'
>
>....and, they lived happily ever after.
>
>Isn't that a sweet story?
>
>Sucker-punch spam with award-winning protection.
>The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on
>the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife,
>'Honey, I'll be right back.'
>
>'Where are you going, coochy cooh?' asked the wife. 'I'm going to the
>bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer.' The wife said, 'You want
>a beer, my love?' She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed
>him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries:
>Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
>
>The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could
>think of saying was, 'Yes, lollypop...but at the bar...you know...they
>have frozen glasses...'
>
>He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him
>by saying, 'You want a frozen glass, puppy face?' She took a huge beer
>mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just
>holding it.
>
>The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, tootsie roll, but at the
>bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I
>won't be long, I'll be right back. I promise. OK?'
>
>'You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh?' She opened the oven and took
>out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in
>blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
>
>'But my sweet honey... at the bar... you know... there's swearing,
>dirty words and all that...'
>
>'You want dirty words, Dickhead? Drink your ******* beer in your
>goddamn frozen mug and eat your motherfucking snacks, because you are
>married now, and you aren't going anywhere! Got it, *******?'
>
>....and, they lived happily ever after.
>
>Isn't that a sweet story?
>
>Sucker-punch spam with award-winning protection.
