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QOTD-2/6/03- Can you really say ANYTHING to your husband?

nrvbrd Posted:

QOTD-2/6/03- Can you really say ANYTHING to your husband?

We all pride ourselves on having the type of mate that is our best friend someone we can tell whatever is on our mind.

My question is do you tell him everything including the negative. For instance if you cannot stand his mother of think his brother is an *** hole, or when he gets into a disagreement with his boss and you think the boss is actually right do you tell him?

Just random examples (the first two do not apply to me but the last one does)

Please tell me do you usually bite your tongue or say whatever is on your mind?
shamma Posted:

Re: QOTD-2/6/03- Can you really say ANYTHING to your husband?

I have had to learn not to say things right then and there, sometimes people do not need to hear the truth especially when they are going thru something. After our wedding I told hubby what I felt about my new inlaws and I told him I will never mention it again. He was very hurt to hear the things I had to say, but I could not hold it in. We try to say when something bothers us or if something is just not right, it might not be the easiest pill to swallow, but we cannot have our mates holding things from us. There is a way to tell someone something and there is a way to tell someone something. I guess its all in the delivery. I know I hate to hear when I am wrong but hubby tells me tho'

natasha Posted:

Re: QOTD-2/6/03- Can you really say ANYTHING to your husband?

In telling my husband somethng that he doesn't want to hear, I focus on the timming and delivery. I think that makes a major difference, and usually we can have a honest conversation about our feelings.

nrvbrd Posted:

Re: QOTD-2/6/03- Can you really say ANYTHING to your husband?

Natasha and Shamma you are right about timing and delivery.

I wait until he is calm and more receptive to tell him things.

Thanks.
dgtlsunshine Posted:

Re: QOTD-2/6/03- Can you really say ANYTHING to your husband?

My husband is soooooooooo abnormal. You can tell him anything at anytime and get the same response. Its good for me telling him things,but when he tells me things he does not understand when I say this was not a good time to tell me.

LizD Posted:

Re: QOTD-2/6/03- Can you really say ANYTHING to your husband?

I agree timing is everything. Makes a world of difference in how it is received.

jms0176 Posted:

Re: QOTD-2/6/03- Can you really say ANYTHING to your husband?

We tell each other things we don't want to hear but need to hear. Sometimes not always right away and after it has occurred.

Suzanne Posted:

Re: QOTD-2/6/03- Can you really say ANYTHING to your husband?

We are very open and honest, i tell him EVERYTHING, somethings i obviiously have to put it more delicatly but i do tell him EVERYTHING

shamma Posted:

Re: QOTD-2/6/03- Can you really say ANYTHING to your husband?

I think my hubby tends to hold on, as he would say, until he is ready Who knows everyone has their own way of doing things.
alina Posted:

Re: QOTD-2/6/03- Can you really say ANYTHING to your husband?

Yes and No, if he feels strongly about something and I disagree, but it doesn't matter, then I keep quiet. An example would be difference in opinion on political issues.

But otherwise its usually a yes, and I try not to 'nag', even if a mistake is repeated. He is more likely to say extremely dry and sarcastic things that don't make me happy, but hopefully with time he'll become more gentle.

And often he is bruttally honest, which has its + and -
nrvbrd Posted:

Re: QOTD-2/6/03- Can you really say ANYTHING to your husband?

Alina, FH is the same way. He is very blunt at times. he does not realize that you have to cognizant of a person's feelings and not be so harsh.

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