renting/owning

DH and I are lucky to be living rent-free for so long...we live in a house that my inlaws own since they are in real estate and gave DH and I a fully paid house to live in...while you may think thats great its really not. since we live rent-free basically they think they can come over anytime, ask us to come over anytime to help them on friday and saturday nights with errands, chores etc and dictate DH life.


We have decided we no longer want to live there and we are looking for an apartment, as we can not afford a house right now. For those of you that own a home how did manage to put money away to buy a home!!... Its so hardd....I am thinking before i even start saving for a home, i should pay off my credit card bills right?? and not worry about that atleast... please offer advice!!

we are in the same boat as far as saving. It is really hard. Just when we think we're starting to save, something always comes up and we're back at square one. right now its taxes
Our one money saving technique that we need to get back on track with, is paying ourselves. You're supposed to pay yourself something every week, or with every pay check, and put that into a savings account.

I want to tell you that I am having the same problems you are right now about wanting to save for a home.

We rent our own apartment, and before the wedding we were livign with the in-laws in their apartment rent free. If I didn't get out of there after the wedding, I would've either shot myself in the head, or killed one of them lol I didn't care how much we had to pay, I just wanted OUT.


Okay, now , I am not one to save money. I SUCK at saving money. I have this hole in my pocket the size of Texas. I just can't keep it in my bank account long enough. However, after the wedding and the year leading up to the wedding, I really had to buckle down. I couldn't go and buy some cute baking stuff or new clothes b/c I had a wedding to pay for, and a new life to live.

I am now actually afraid and ashamed when I spend money. I evne spent money on groceries last week and I feel guilty for it now! I am trying my hardest to pay off my credit cards.

I told DH that this year we are going to concentrate on any debt we have, and just wipe it out by the end of next year. My car loan is almost paid off, it should be done by next year, he is going to pay his car off with our taxes, then that leaves my big personal loan, and one big credit card, and 2 smaller tiny credit cards. I am putting everything I have extra into those. I am trying so hard to save money for a house that I have holes in my jeans and shoes and coat, and I don't want to spend money to buy new ones!

It's tough, but you really have to just put your heart and soul into it. I want a house so badly, I am willing to even move out of the state just to be able to afford one.


Sorry this is so long lol I am just so passionate about it..b/c I know how it feels. Just stick to your guns and you will get what you want. :) Good Luck!

Sorry that you guys are having a hard time- is there anyway that you and your dh or even dh alone can sit down with his parents and come to a compromise- maybe at least till you can clear your credit card debt and save some money either for an apartment or to buy?

I dont know your financial situation- but you have an amazing opportunity at your ils- and by saving that rent money every month, you really could save easily for a home

for us savings worked like this (before we bought our coop)- we paid ourselves first- 30% of each of our checks goes into savings/investments, after that the bills and then what was leftover was fun money

But first things first- get rid of the debt-it is probably costing you much more in interest each month than you would get on a savings account

good luck!

get out of debt ASAP (if you have debt)

not having credit card debt is what really enables DH and I to save so much

buy cheap food, use coupons, only buy something if you *NEED* it - little things will add up....

i dont know your financial status BUT if you are living rent free you should have A LOT of money - if DH didn't have to pay rent we would be able to save another 10k or more a year just from that alone

honestly we have had a very VERY hard time saving...so know that you are not the only one. Times are tough - and it seems to be very common these days...especially for us new yorkers. Every time we get one step ahead, something happens & we are back to square one.. Now with our paycuts & hour cuts, it has been even harder.. Luckily DH is in the process of enlisting in the coast guard right now...we will probably move out of our apt. about a month prior to him leaving & stay at my mom's...that month all of our paychecks will be banked w/the exception of our car expense & money we will give my mom to help her out....he will then be away for 8weeks, and his paychecks during that time will be completely banked, while mine covers the small expenses i will have while living here. I look forward to finally being able to have an existing savings account, and just a little extra in our checking also! ...and when he gets out of BC we will continue to save...my paychecks will all go to savings, while his will cover our expenses & then some.. We don't have too much debt, so we will hopefully pay that off in a timely matter.... i just can't wait to be COMFORTABLE. we have been in a really rough place financially for just too long - and we don't want it to stay that way forever. Hugs to you & i hope that things get easier/better for you! BELIEVE me when i say i know how hard it can be! I know owning a home is a dream...but try to remind urself that renting really isn't all that bad...u do what u have to do. My sil&bil have been married for 6years now...there were many times that they considered buying, & got very frustrated with it not panning out when they wanted it to...they now have a one year old, and are in a beautiful 2bedroom apt, but are starting the househunt this coming year...they tell everyone that saving for the past 6years has been the best thing they ever did & that they are so happy they didn't jump on the buying bandwagon just because they wanted to. Instead they settled for staying in a beautiful apt., really budgeted & saved & now they are in a GREAT place...they will not be completely strapped when they finally buy their home, and will be able to enjoy being homeowners. things will work out..just try to hang in there! i know saving while renting is tough, but time flies & before u know it u'll get there i will say that if u can deal w/the in-laws - stay as long as u can where u are & work out a budget, ON PAPER. Living rent free is something that not many people get to take advantage of & can really be an opportunity to get a savings going!

How did we do it? We budgeted ourselves so we could sock away a lot of money. Not only did we buy our home, we paid for our wedding too. DH and I still go when we really put into perspective what we saved. We both had debt too. For myself, I made a list of all my bills: car payment, school loans, cell phone, etc. From there I knew how much money I needed to cover those bills every month. Then I decided how much money I needed to live on - buy groceries, gas, etc. From there I put the rest into my savings. I was able to save so much in no time. I didn't touch the money in my savings. Before we were even engaged I started doing this.

Its not easy...thats for sure. Especially with the cost of living in New York. But it is POSSIBLE!
The best advice I can give anyone is to get yourself out of any debt you may have. The biggest reason we were able to buy a house was that we virtually have NO debt..No credit cards, car payments, loans, etc, etc. I really never had a 'expensive' car...Heck I was getting hand-me-downs practically all my life..which meant beat up old used cars. To this day I don't consider myself having an 'expensive' car by any means..and the best part..I have literally no debt that is owed to a car loan!!!!! I don't buy things I can't afford, I don't buy myself designer jeans, expensive clothes, and bags (except maybe for a coach once in a while). I lived cheap pretty much all of my life, but thats the biggest reason I was able to save!!! You don't realize that things do add up..even little inexpensive things such as dining out. We don't go out to eat unless its a special occasion. I bring my own lunch to work and I don't make random trips to 7-11. That combined with the fact that we both lived at home for a while (until we were 26) we were able to save a lot of money! That money was used for our down payment. I never really lived lavishly and sometimes I wondered if I missed out..but I look at it now..and I have a house to show for it! So the best advice is to save, don't spend excess amounts of money on things you don't need, be frugal if need be!!! Get yourself out of debt! hth

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Posted by Mici n KC

How did we do it? We budgeted ourselves so we could sock away a lot of money. Not only did we buy our home, we paid for our wedding too. DH and I still go when we really put into perspective what we saved. We both had debt too. For myself, I made a list of all my bills: car payment, school loans, cell phone, etc. From there I knew how much money I needed to cover those bills every month. Then I decided how much money I needed to live on - buy groceries, gas, etc. From there I put the rest into my savings. I was able to save so much in no time. I didn't touch the money in my savings. Before we were even engaged I started doing this.

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This is exactly what we did. We paid for our entire wedding from engagement party to honeymoon. We budgeted our bills and just took everything extra and put it in savings. We are still doing this.

I would suggest paying off majority of debt before owning a home. I dont think youll ever get a ahead if you dont once you have a mortgage.

Also, as much as you hate living in your inlaws home, I'd stick with it for a while and save as much as you can. If you have a hard time saving now it will only get harder once you are paying monthly rent.