Has it happen to you...does it happen in your office.
There is someone here who is very annoying, mostly to me. Says things that are totally inappropriate but I would never do anything about it. He is a nice guy but just says things that are off the wall and shock me! People have said that they can put a stop to it but I just ignore it for the most part.
Anyway - I just cant believe that in this day and age people are not more careful with what they say! Its crazy. Do you have any stories to share?
RisiLeigh
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
Last year, we were at a company bowling party and one of the techs (guys who work in the field who I talk to everyday but rarely see) was being really graphic and inappropriate with a lollipop! I am sure you can imagine what he was doing. I didn't say anything to him, but the next day, myself and another coworker told my boss. He actually wrote everything up, including witnesses and stuff and called the guy out on it. The guy apologized to me and actually now, we're on great terms! He has changed a lot since that day.
SFAR89
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
I didn't know back when I was younger, but at the job I had at the time, I had a couple of people say some inappropriate things. Me being so nieve just shrugged it off, but if that would happen now I would totally say something.
Jenn04
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
This person will say things about my appearance but not only that will tell stories or jokes that are 'off color' or talk about a particular scene in a movie...anyway things that are totally not appropriate for the workplace.
TrueLoveIn2008
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
I wouldn't call this sexual harrassment, but there was this guy I hated at my last job - just a know-it-all weirdo. He always said strange things, and one day, when we were in a meeting, it came out that I had gotten my wedding dress, and he said, when's the date? and I didn't have one yet although we were planning on the following fall - so I said that - and he was like, that's puttin the horse before the cart a bit, isn't it? I was like, what????? as if the wedding still isn't happening just because I don't have a date yet? yes, he was married.
But that's not the point of this post we were in another meeting with him and he was telling this story about how one of his friends' mom worked at some college as a dean ... one of his other friends applied but didn't get in, so he sent her a pile of poop in a box. he used the words 'deficated in a box and sent it to her.'
I'm sorry - you just DON'T talk about that AT WORK! Totally inappropriate. Everyone else thought I was overreacting when I said that was disgusting and it shouldn't be discussed now. I think it's GROSS to talk about like that, and it doesn't happen at work! (Plus the word 'deficate' is just sooooo disgusting ... I'd rather hear 'shiit' or 'poop.')
MnM182008
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
Not at my job since I work with all preschoolers lol, but of my bf had a huge problem at work a few years back. A guy at her office would constantly say things to her, and than he would always stare at her. People thought she was making it up. Finally he started doing it to a new girl they hired and she complained as well. They fired him eventually, and when they cleaned out his desk, he had photos in there of a few naked women, (not employees of the job), but still who brings porn to work.
So frightening.
SusiBtoM
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
Can you tell him to knock it iff, that you don't care to listen to that kind of talk ?
No reason that you have to listen to such stuff. My company - they are pretty strict about such stuff. We have had seminars about this, with mandatory attendance. On-line compliance seminars again with mandatory attendance as a refresher course.
nifheim
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
my old boss crossed the line with me a few times it was more abusive then just sexual harrassment. I allowed it and never complained until i finally snapped and threw a wrench at his head IoI
He would grind up against me when walking around me when there was PLENTY of space to get around. He had porn everywhere magazines, pics hung up -etc. I told him it didn't bother me which it didn't until he started to read it in front of me, walk into the bathroom then walk out after a bit and say that was a great tug or some stuff like that.
He would say I am a horrible designer and wasn't worth the pay he gave me ($13 a hour) even though I ran his and his brothers shop. I would have him rubbing my shoulders and sniffing my hair when I worked because he was lonely. I felt bad for him so I allowed it until he finally just pissed me off when he was cursing at me in front of a customer for a mistake he made and then after the customer left he smacked me and then i was done - i flipped out walked out and found another job.
SusiBtoM
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
Posted by nifheim
he smacked me and then i was done - i flipped out walked out and found another job.
Too bad you didn't toss the wrench at his crotch. His smacking you is assault. You could have filed charges against him.
Bride908
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
I had a guy who worked in the office that used to follow me around. He just freaked me out and I didnt know how to handle it. He was Mr. Nice guy but was totally inappropriate. He got my cell # from my file and my home #. He started to call my my house!!! I would just avoid his calls. It was really uncomfortable. If I went out for after work functions he would usually show up. He tried giving me gifts. Gift cards to Vic Secret, stuff like that.
One of my managers asked if he was bothering me and took note of it but I never pushed the harassment issue. I just didnt know what to do. I eventually moved on to another job. He still called after that but I ignore him.
Looking back I dont think I wouldve brought up sexual harassment charges but I think I would def had told him he was completely out of line and made me uncomfortable. I was only 20-21 yrs old then.....
jaep129
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
See I have a dirty mouth and say things 'off color' to some people at work and they say things back. We have a relationship that this is what we do (like tell stories about things or rude comments) b/c there is an understanding and only around 'us'. One guy though does not know when to turn it off or down around other people who are around. I hate that and have said to him that you cant act like that with Jamie b/c she is sensitive. People are just so insensitive to others. I am sorry this is happening. How about making an anonymous call to your office about it?
nifheim
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
i felt and somewhat still do it was my fault for allowing it to get that far. I am the 'cool' gal that is crude and is one of the guys. Now that I am older I realize that its not the best attribute to have since men see it as a signal to abuse you.
Jenn04
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
Oh man - I would rather speak to him to his face about it first. He is understanding a nice guy but I dont have the balls to do it!
Jenn04
Posted:
Member since
Re: Sexual Harrassment
Posted by nifheim
my old boss crossed the line with me a few times it was more abusive then just sexual harrassment. I allowed it and never complained until i finally snapped and threw a wrench at his head IoI
He would grind up against me when walking around me when there was PLENTY of space to get around. He had porn everywhere magazines, pics hung up -etc. I told him it didn't bother me which it didn't until he started to read it in front of me, walk into the bathroom then walk out after a bit and say that was a great tug or some stuff like that.
He would say I am a horrible designer and wasn't worth the pay he gave me ($13 a hour) even though I ran his and his brothers shop. I would have him rubbing my shoulders and sniffing my hair when I worked because he was lonely. I felt bad for him so I allowed it until he finally just pissed me off when he was cursing at me in front of a customer for a mistake he made and then after the customer left he smacked me and then i was done - i flipped out walked out and found another job.
What! That is the craziest story I have ever heard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
nifheim
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
yea it seems unreal but it was real. I have had soo many issues with my past jobs but I have learned to not be the cool person that i think i am IoI
Butterfly123
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
I have two words for you, restaurant industry. Restaurant Industry=sexual harassment. Ive worked with managers who are LEWD and CRUDE. When I first started out in the industry I was 20 and I had a manager follow me into the womens bathroom and while I was in the stall beg me to lick my feet. YES LICK MY FEET AND MY BOOTS. He said if I let him do this he would take care of me and buy me an apt in the city. It was the weirdest experience of my life. I laughed it off and walked out. He was fired weeks later. But it doesnt stop there. Im constantly around nasty talk. But lets face it, Im not going to put myself through a huge sexual harassment case and possibly throw myself so negatively in the public eye. It ***** but maybe if I were down and out I would do something.
JennNicole
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
ahh sorry your going through this. Years ago it happened to me , I had to leave the place of business , it was the husband of the wife that was the owner.
It was a disaster! He used to pop in when she wasn't around , and since I was the manager he used to make me drop off the cash at his house at the end of the night, the straw that broke the camels back was once I arrived he had music playing and drinks made for me and wanted to talk and go over #'s.He was trying to massage my back - I was soo disgusted, I ran out of there! Can you imagine in his own house non the less he would do this!!! pathetic loser!
p.s I quit
Jenn04
Posted:
Member since
Re: Sexual Harrassment
Posted by JennNicole
ahh sorry your going through this. Years ago it happened to me , I had to leave the place of business , it was the husband of the wife that was the owner.
It was a disaster! He used to pop in when she wasn't around , and since I was the manager he used to make me drop off the cash at his house at the end of the night, the straw that broke the camels back was once I arrived he had music playing and drinks made for me and wanted to talk and go over #'s.He was trying to massage my back - I was soo disgusted, I ran out of there! Can you imagine in his own house non the less he would do this!!! pathetic loser!
p.s I quit
UGH EWWWWWWWWWWW Totally out of line. No this guy at my job is just more annoying than anything. I just cant believe he has worked for this corporate company for 30+ years and gets away with it. Rumor has it that he cheated on his wife with one of the assistants here and his wife came in here with a knife! I dont know if that is a bogus story but everyone here knows about it. Anyway, he is now with the gf and not the wife anymore.
RockysGirl
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
I used to work as a weightloss counselor a couple years ago. I was 21 at the time, the youngest one there (the other ladies were in their 50's). There was this one client who would come in a couple times a week. A BIG guy! Very tall and just all around intimidating. He was very sweet though. But every time he came in, he would have to hunt me down and give me a big tight crazy bear hug, which was kind of awkward. Even when i wasn't the counselor actually weighing him in, he'd find me anyway. And there was no escaping it either, because he was just so big & strong. Once, I was stocking some stuff and he actually went behind the desk (where he's not supposed to be) and cornered me there. He didn't DO anything inappropriate (thank God - b/c nobody could even see us back there), but it made me incredibly uncomfortable how close he stood to me and all of that. And it was really bad when I WAS the one weighing him in cause then I'd have to sit with him in my office alone - needless to say, I always kept the door wide open.
Ugh - so it wasn't sexual harassment at all, but I was VERY uncomfortable with it. And normally i'm not like that. I totally just let things go most of the time, but this I just felt was out of hand. Finally I told the ladies that i wouldn't sit with him anymore, and i began hiding in the back when I saw him come in. One of the corporate 'superiors' came in and totally made fun of me for it, saying that he's such a sweet man and I'm paranoid. I think she thought i was just young & stupid. But I don't care. I felt uncomfortable and shouldn't have to deal with it. (the other ladies who i actually WORKED WITH saw what i was talking about tho and totally understood).
mrsjpc3
Posted:
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Re: Sexual Harrassment
I had a horrifying experience in 2001. It is too long to type. it was a higher up making advances and such, I went to HR to complain, he retaliated, i transfered departments, and his only repercussion was to take a 3 day seminar at the hilton about sexual harrassment. it almost doesnt pay to say anything.. i contacted an attorney, it was such a terrible experience. Then 9/11 happened,and I wound up leaving my job in manhattan...
i saw him a few yrs later in chilis , I walked up, didnt say a word, and poured a drink on him and left. I saw him at Irish fest in long beach the following year, he saw me, and hauled A$$ outta there. that was that - have never seen him again. I later found out there were numerous complaints made against him, but because of his title, they 'swept it under the rug'.
