Search in your own words. Describe what you need or ask a wedding planning question.
How are things going? I haven't cked in in awhile so I was wondering...and hoping for the best.
Things are good and not so good. Therapy is wonderful for me, but I really don't feel he is benefiting from it at all. Basically he sits through the sessions without saying a word and if he's asked a direct question, he simply doesn't have an answer. I know the therapist is frustrated with him. I've completely cut his family out of my life. He is having a difficult time with that because he feels I'm putting him in the middle. Since I've made that decision, I feel such a strong sense of relief and peace in my life. I did not end up going to the wedding and it stung a little bit but I got over the feeling. It would have been much worse had I gone and they started in on me. I will also be missing another wedding coming up (h's cousin) but again, it's soo worth it not be placed in a uncomfortable situation. I really don't know what to do at this point, I'm sort of moving through life day by day. As time goes by and as I discover/investigate things, all roads point to us living our lives separately but for now I'm hanging on (although I don't know why). Seriously, I feel I can do MUCH better than him; clearly he doesn't deserve me or my devotion but I'm afraid to take that next step. Last night (at therapy) I looked on him like he was a pathetic child when the therapist asked him what purpose I served in his life and he responded that I make steak! Very touching!:) He clearly couldn't search his small mind and come up with something better. I look on him now and I wonder what I ever saw in him. I KNOW I have to move on with my life, but it's soo hard to leave all you know (my home, my life) and start anew. We both need to be fair with each other and let each other find someone who will make us happy. It's soo sad too because things have been 'okay' with us the last couple of days but that honeymoon period doesn't last long. Thanks for the words of encouragement from everyone.
Shamee - my thoughts are with you. You know, its definitely a hard decision to make, but having been there, I know that you need to decide if this is how you want to feel for the rest of your life, or if you want to find TRUE happiness. Once you have made that decision, it won't be easy, but you can only go UP from there. I'm sorry therapy doesn't seem to be helping. It's a shame your husband can't see your devotion to him and stand up to his family. I'll keep you in my thoughts! Stay strong.
Shamee,
Like Lee said, my thoughts are with you as well, and yes I have been there done that as well. It is a difficult decision to make, and there will be alot of soul searching. You need to decide what makes YOU happy, is your life going to be fruitful with him or will you be just going through the motions. Be well and remember we are here
This is very very tough. I can only imagine..
but have een through hard things in my life
too.
I send a hug to you!
