Does anyone else find sharing finances hard? I mean the DH usually paid off my credit cards. So he knew what i spent but it wans't all in his face you know-just the number. But nwo we have one joined bank account and I HATE it OMG LMAO because I feel sooo guilty when i buy my little indulgences like pretty underoos or a mai/pedi. I mena he never makes a big deal of it, but I guess because my mom always said to 'leep a little on the side' I feel weird. Like if I make too many purchases in one day or he does, Citibank calls us both and asks if those were accurate charges....
I HATE IT LMAO feel like Im on lock down! Especially when comes to rent-I pay the rent but I dont make much-like 400 a week and our rent is 1,000 a month. But then i pay another 320 in travel a month!Plus stuff like girl needs-tampons etc. So sometimes I am short by a few bucks and he asks why and Im like Um HELLO trying here. I think its hard too because he is used to making so much more than I am and he used to cover the rent. Doesnt realize most of us are the workign poor!
Anyone else feeling this?
Kara and Todd
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Re: Sharing finances..Yippee or OH BOY!?
Actually, sharing finances came very easily to us. We've been sharing them since before we were married. ALL of our finances are joint - credit cards, bank accounts, etc. We stopped arguing about money once we merged our accounts b/c it was no longer 'I pay for this and you pay for that.' It was ALL our money.
That said, joint finances don't work for everyone and it's an adjustment after being used to managing your own money without any other say!
Brian and Marie
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Re: Sharing finances..Yippee or OH BOY!?
I'm with you!! We're having a difficult time adjusting, but it's getting a little easier!! I think its so rough for us because times are tough right now, so every penny needs to be accounted for! I'm hoping that once our financial situation gets easier, then so will sharing the accounts and stuff!
bonniejd
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Re: Sharing finances..Yippee or OH BOY!?
Funny, DH and I are trying to figure this out now. We just joined our finances and I said that I wanted to keep a separate individual account and he thought it was so weird. We have been livign together for a long time now, but our finances have been separate and it is hard for me to give up that independence. Plus, he is very much the saver, and I, the shopper, so I feel like it is sooner or later going to get difficult.
futrmrsblt
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Re: Sharing finances..Yippee or OH BOY!?
we share 100% now.. before i had a separate account since his/our bank wasn't near my job.. but now that i dont work i cancelled that account i do have my own cc's so if its sometign i want to 'hide' or if he might yell at me i put it on that haha...
i like having joint finances cause im better at managing bills ..and he's better at saving money-- im a shopper so him seeing what i buy makes me buy less
Nina_m74
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Re: Sharing finances..Yippee or OH BOY!?
We've had joint finances for a few years now, basically as soon as we moved in together - we never split the bills, we just pooled our $. I do remember it being tough in the beginning because I felt like I had to explain everything i spent, which wasn't really the case.
Once we set up a budget and alloted money for spending $ I didn't feel that way anymore. We still discuss any large purchase with the other, it works pretty smoothly now for us :)
Maybe set up a spending budget or overall budget so you both see where you are and you'll feel better
Ericab1980
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Re: Sharing finances..Yippee or OH BOY!?
more YIKES It's not that bad..we have separate checking joint savings to pool our $ for expenses but I least I feel like I can still 'stow away' for a rainy day or that LV bag I've been eyeing..
MeNBobs
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Re: Sharing finances..Yippee or OH BOY!?
We have joint accounts and it works out really well for us. We set a definite amount that has to be in the checking account at the end of each week to cover all the bills plus some at the end of the month. After we have that money in the account we know what we have left over for groceries, date night and knee high pointy black boots.
Trishthedish
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Re: Sharing finances..Yippee or OH BOY!?
We've been living together for 3 years and have had joint accounts but at the time of the month when the house bills are due DH signs over a check to me and I deposit it into our joint checking account. For the most part we still have our own personal checking accounts and savings accounts as well. it's worked for us over the past few years like this so I don't think we'll be changing it anytime soon. We finally got our first joint credit card for Macy's but I don't think we'll be using that much.
portjeffbride
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Re: Sharing finances..Yippee or OH BOY!?
yippee for me, and oh boy for DH
I'm older than him, so I've accumulated more STUFF and more DEBT I took care of the vast majority of it prior to getting married, yet he still managed to inherit one small student loan of mine
eh, my rationalization of this is he also inherited all my furniture, electronics, and kitchen supplies.... so I guess he came out ahead
oh, he also inhereted my car loan when I bought a new prius last year whoops!
we don't argue at all about finances, though.... well, we actually don't argue . So far, we've always been on the same page with what is fiscally prudent or not....
diva7531
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Re: Sharing finances..Yippee or OH BOY!?
This second it is easy. We are taking a one month break from saving! But this next check we go back to saving. It isn't so bad. He makes a little more than I do, so if I need something I just let him know. He busts my chops, but he knows if I am asking I need it!
MrsPags
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Re: Sharing finances..Yippee or OH BOY!?
We have started sharing our finances early on when we were paying for the wedding. We each keep our own checking accounts for daily expenses and a joint checking for rent, bills etc. Then we have our reg joint savings.
Luckily we aren't in debt. Well I still have my student loans but no other debt like cc's etc and all of our furniture and housy stuff has been taking care of so now we just focus on saving.
It was a bit hard at first but we have gotten used to it and he has come to terms with my shopping habits
I do admit though, in the past I have been a bit like whats yours is mine and whats mine is mine. I have been working on that.
PegaLega
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Re: Sharing finances..Yippee or OH BOY!?
aw Jen you arent the only one. Us doing our finances together works out better for us then being seperate but there are times I feel guilty about buying that something for myself. I feel ya honey pie
Jennifer907
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Re: Sharing finances..Yippee or OH BOY!?
I think for the most part we've handled it pretty well. I however, make a lot more than DH, roughly twice as much, so when he asks me how much something costs (like when I got my nails done the other day for instance) I flip. I always refer to it as my money, and I'm trying to correct it. The good part is I've cut my spending habits significantly. I spent $30 on a sweater the other day and felt guilty! Before getting engaged, I wouldn't have thought about buying a $30 sweater because it's too cheap. So it's helped in that way.
