Thank You Cards for those who no-gifted you

I'm just curious how you guys handled that. At my wedding I had a couple of people who did not give us a gift or card or anything. Some of them promised to mail it to us later that week, but a month later still nothing - so needless to say I'm not holding my breath. Yes, I was a little insulted by that (at least give us a CARD, jeez) but I'm over it now and just wondering about the Thank Yous. I mean, to the people who WERE very generous, I obviously want to thank them for coming AS WELL as their much appreciated gifts. But for the other 'slackers', DH seems to think that we shouldn't give them ANY Thank You at all (boys... they just don't understand). Obviously I'm still sending one to each of them and I'm wondering how to handle that. I figure just thank them for coming?? I mean, I do appreciate them being there to celebrate with us.

What did you guys do?

one of the girls previously wrote on here this:
Hey Girls,

I need some advice on wording my thank you’s. They should be in by next week so I’m just thinking about how to word them and came up with some ideas. If you have any ideas or suggestions please feel free to tell me them, I could use the help……..What do you think of the following:

1. (Those who attended) Thank you for the generous wedding gift and for sharing in our special day. Your thoughtfulness was very much appreciated.

Or Instead of “sharing in our special day” should it be “being a part of our special day” And also should I put “thank you for your generous” or “thank you for the Generous” I didn’t want to use the word “your” twice. Sounded repetitive to me. Or is the way I have it just fine the way it is…..

2. (Those who did attend and gave a gift-Cash or Check) Thank you for the generous wedding gift. Your thoughtfulness was very much appreciated.

3. (Those who did attend and gave a gift from bridal registry) Thank you for the lovely wedding gift. Your thoughtfulness was very much appreciated. Instead of lovely should I put beautiful?

4. For those who gave crapola I want to put “thank you for your inadequate gift, your rudeness was very much appreciated”……LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

Of course I have special thank you’s for special people…

HAHAHAHA

I wrote:

Dear No-Gifter (lol),

Thank you so much for coming to our wedding. It was great to see you. We are so happy you were there to share our special day.

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Posted by futuremrsfab

I didnt send thank yous to those that didnt give a gift- I may get beat for this- but we thanked them for coming to the wedding & they got a free dinner.

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I totally agree with you and your decision!

We had only 1 couple who didnt give a gift. I sent them a thank you card and this is what I wrote:

Dear _____ & _____,

Thank you for sharing our day with us. We hope you had a nice time.

Love, Marisa & Jimmy

I figured if they accidently forgot a gift, this card would give them a nudge, and if they purposely didnt give one, well I just felt this card would at least give ME some satisfaction LOL!

Sure enough, they ended up mailing us a check with an apology a few weeks later. They said they left the envelope at home and after our wedding they just forgot about it. So, I was definitely glad I sent them something.

Dear so and so,

We just wanted to send our sincerest thanks to you for coming and sharing in our special day. we had a wonderful time and hope you did too!

Love,
Joey and Danielle

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Posted by futuremrsfab

I didnt send thank yous to those that didnt give a gift- I may get beat for this- but we thanked them for coming to the wedding & they got a free dinner.

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that's exactly how DH feels. He says 'Why are WE thanking THEM? They got a nice night out and a free dinner with it! They should be thanking US!' lol lol

I hear ya on that and I totally agree. But the no-gifters at my wedding DID acknowledge it at least. They told me that they forgot, which is weird since we went around greeting each person. I don't know how you forget, but I guess. I have a feeling my card is still sitting in their houses collecting dust So I don't wanna NOT send them a thank you.

I like what RisiLeigh wrote:

Thank you for sharing our day with us. We hope you had a nice time.

haha. DH will love that

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Posted by cberry109

4. For those who gave crapola I want to put “thank you for your inadequate gift, your rudeness was very much appreciated”……LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

Of course I have special thank you’s for special people…

HAHAHAHA

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lol

I'm just oging to give my honest opinion here.

I think it stinks when people go to a wedding without giving a card. However, they are not REQUIRED to give a gift and to not thank them for coming and sharing in your day is a little rude IMO. I personally could never not thank someone for coming and sharing in a special event for me. I had a Friday wedding, people left work early, sat in traffic, etc. Even people that didn't even give a card got a 'thanks so much for coming, we loved having you there'.

To each their own. I just could never do it.

WE had several no gifters and not very happy about it. When I say several I mean like 4 or 5. Not even a card or an acknowledgement...which is the worst if you ask me. I will probably be the only the one to say this but we did not send Thank Yous to them. Does that mean that we dont feel bad about it...no I feel bad. Does that mean we wont give a card or gift them when they get married...no. We will probably gift.

I dont believe there is a right or wrong answer - you have to do what you feel is right.

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Posted by Jenn04



I dont believe there is a right or wrong answer - you have to do what you feel is right.

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very true

we had one no gifter - but his gift (it was my cousin) may have been included in my uncle's gift to us - but i'm not really sure b/c i don't think my cousin's name was on my uncle's card.....but he does live at home with them.....

i don't know - we kind of have a feeling he no gifted us - and he brought a guest and he is my age so he could at least given us a card - i thought it was a little rude that there wasn't even a card.....and i bet his parents think that he gave us a card and gift....

i was wondering how to handle the situation as well.....if he wasn't included in my uncle's gift i have a feeling my uncle would be ticked off that his son didn't give us a gift but especially about the no card part - all the other siblings gave generous gifts and more importantly a CARD that said congratulations

i don't know - my cousin is weird - there was an incident where my DH took a ride with him to the store (to be nice) and he got stuck with the bill! my cousin was on the phone and wasn't acknowledging the clerk when it was time to pay and my DH felt awkward so he just paid for the stuff (it was liquor for my uncle's party and my uncle gave my cousin the money to pay for the liquor) and he waited for my cousin to give him back the money he put up and he never did - he pocketed my uncle's money and let DH pay for it all - and its not like he thought my DH paid to be nice b/c he didn't even thank DH for paying.....totally weird.....and it was over 50 in alcohol - and here my uncle thinks HE bought it and DH really bought it - so it was kind of weird....

so b/c of his shady past with us and money we have a feeling we got no gifted

please dont copy i probably will delete this hahaha

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Posted by Future Mulligan

we had one no gifter - but his gift (it was my cousin) may have been included in my uncle's gift to us - but i'm not really sure b/c i don't think my cousin's name was on my uncle's card.....but he does live at home with them.....

i don't know - we kind of have a feeling he no gifted us - and he brought a guest and he is my age so he could at least given us a card - i thought it was a little rude that there wasn't even a card.....and i bet his parents think that he gave us a card and gift....

i was wondering how to handle the situation as well.....if he wasn't included in my uncle's gift i have a feeling my uncle would be ticked off that his son didn't give us a gift but especially about the no card part - all the other siblings gave generous gifts and more importantly a CARD that said congratulations

i don't know - my cousin is weird - there was an incident where my DH took a ride with him to the store (to be nice) and he got stuck with the bill! my cousin was on the phone and wasn't acknowledging the clerk when it was time to pay and my DH felt awkward so he just paid for the stuff (it was liquor for my uncle's party and my uncle gave my cousin the money to pay for the liquor) and he waited for my cousin to give him back the money he put up and he never did - he pocketed my uncle's money and let DH pay for it all - and its not like he thought my DH paid to be nice b/c he didn't even thank DH for paying.....totally weird.....and it was over 50 in alcohol - and here my uncle thinks HE bought it and DH really bought it - so it was kind of weird....

so b/c of his shady past with us and money we have a feeling we got no gifted

please dont copy i probably will delete this hahaha

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Yes we have a similar situation...one of our no giftters was my cousin and his fiance who flew in from nashville. MY dad thinks that my cousin assumes he is apart of my uncles gift but only my uncle signed the card. Plus my cousin and his finance are 25, live on their own and can give their own gift. MY dad keeps makinge excuses that they dont have $$ but I know they make an ok living. But I guess I do not know their whole situation. Ok and they are getting married this august...so do we gift? I would rather not but I think we have to give alittle something. I just feel we are always the bigger, better person, always gifting when we dont have to etc. So with the thank yous, we took a stand and did not send them!