Thank you question

wood2be Posted: Jun 16, 2005 08:01 PM

Thank you question

What do you write in someone's thank you note if their check bounced? We had one rubber check from DH's cousin. She never mentioned it to us but I would assume she knows. DH thinks we should just thank them for coming and not mention the 'gift'. I feel kind of bad though What do you all think?

Soon2BeMrsS Posted: Jun 16, 2005 08:42 PM

Re: Thank you question

Let itgo, send her a thank you for coming, don't mention the gift show her you have class. That was awful she did that, but the sad thing is she has no money!

wood2be Posted: Jun 16, 2005 08:53 PM

Re: Thank you question

Posted by Soon2BeMrs.S

Let itgo, send her a thank you for coming, don't mention the gift show her you have class. That was awful she did that, but the sad thing is she has no money!

As you can tell, we've been debating this for awhile since our wedding was in October! I feel terrible for her but DH is still mad.

Soon2BeMrsS Posted: Jun 16, 2005 08:54 PM

Re: Thank you question

with right, but if she's poor what can you do?

JimmysBride Posted: Jun 16, 2005 09:17 PM

Re: Thank you question

Send a genuinely nice thank you and make no mention of the gift.... she knows her check bounced.

suven Posted: Jun 16, 2005 09:57 PM

Re: Thank you question

Posted by JimmysBride

Send a genuinely nice thank you and make no mention of the gift.... she knows her check bounced.

should she include the check?

I'm sorry, but I would have definitely said something about the bounced check. Not in the thank you card, but I probably would have called her up and said, 'I have your check. Do you need it back for your records?' If she brushed it off, I would have left it at that.

You never really know what happened. for example, when my mom turned 50, people gave her checks. She deposited them in the bank, but noticed that the deposit never came up on her statement.

When she went to the bank, they told her that she never made the deposit.

Luckily, she had the carbon copy of the deposit ticket, to the bank credited her the money.

BUT, none of the checks had EVER been cashed! A few of the people called her to ask if she had cashed the checks because they never received them back and the funds never came out of their accounts.

To this day, those people STILL haven't had the funds taken from their accounts. That was 6 years ago!

bluesashbride Posted: Jun 16, 2005 10:11 PM

Re: Thank you question

just thank her for coming, no need to 'go there' about the gift, especially if you like her. she may be on hard times...

Dooodles Posted: Jun 17, 2005 09:58 AM

Re: Thank you question

I admit - DH and I bounced a check for our dear friends wedding last year. There had been an error with the bank that we were unaware of and were horrified to learn that our check had bounced. Our friends were the ones to let us know it bounced and we took care of things including any charges they received.

wood2be Posted: Jun 17, 2005 10:06 AM

Re: Thank you question

I hope no one thinks I'm being petty or harsh. My dilemma is just saying 'Thank You for Coming' or 'Thank you for the generous gift' (no mention of it bouncing). I think I'll go with DH and simply say 'thank you for coming'

Thanks for your input ladies!

suven Posted: Jun 17, 2005 10:14 AM

Re: Thank you question

Posted by wood2be

I hope no one thinks I'm being petty or harsh. My dilemma is just saying 'Thank You for Coming' or 'Thank you for the generous gift' (no mention of it bouncing). I think I'll go with DH and simply say 'thank you for coming'

Thanks for your input ladies!

not petty or harsh at all!!

I honestly would say something to the person who bounced the check!

MCDO15 Posted: Jun 17, 2005 10:37 AM

Re: Thank you question

it could go both ways..

for the person that said somthing about being poor, then why give a check in the first place...? to give the appereance you gave something?

this could go either way, not saying anything or mentioning it to them cause at the end, it cost you money.

Soon2BeMrsS Posted: Jun 17, 2005 12:36 PM

Re: Thank you question

I guess, I'd want to come out like the bigger person, however I would never accpt a check from them again. Is is too mean to send the returned check in the thank you?

Soon2BeMrsS Posted: Jun 17, 2005 12:38 PM

Re: Thank you question

your not harsh or petty, she did you wrong

wood2be Posted: Jun 17, 2005 01:07 PM

Re: Thank you question

Posted by Soon2BeMrs.S

I guess, I'd want to come out like the bigger person, however I would never accpt a check from them again. Is is too mean to send the returned check in the thank you?

I know being the sender, I would find it hysterical!

hmm8191 Posted: Jun 17, 2005 01:48 PM

Re: Thank you question

You should send back the check with a request for the bank fee. We got one check that bounced and they sent us a new one of $25 more!

So here's a question what's worse? no check or one that bounced?

wood2be Posted: Jun 17, 2005 02:00 PM

Re: Thank you question

Posted by hmm8191

You should send back the check with a request for the bank fee. We got one check that bounced and they sent us a new one of $25 more!

So here's a question what's worse? no check or one that bounced?

I'm on the fence with this one.

I might have to say the bounced check is worse. You get whacked with the BC charge. So, you are paying for your gift Also, it puts both parties in a very awkward position.

Although, it is probably a very honest mistake on the gift givers part and it's the thought that counts right?

suven Posted: Jun 17, 2005 03:01 PM

.

wood2be Posted: Jun 17, 2005 03:22 PM

Re: Thank you question

Good advice and you are right Sue! I appreciate it

SeptWed Posted: Jun 17, 2005 03:28 PM

Re: Thank you question

We had a check bounce and our bank charged us money for it so i was really p'o'd. The person did apologize the next time we saw them but we never got another gift. I did not send them a thank you.