The School's Answering Machine...LOL

This is the answering machine message the Pacific Palisades High School (California) staff voted to record on their school telephone answering system. Ths came about because they implemented a policy requiring students and parents to be responsible for their children's absences and missing homework.The school and teachers are being sued by parents who want their children's failing grades changed to passing grades even though those children were absent 15 - 30 times during the semester and did not complete enough school work to pass their classes. This was voted unanimously by the office staff as the actual answering machine message for the school --
'Hello! You have reached the automated answering service of your school. In order to assist you in connecting the right staff member, please listen to all your options before making a selection:

To lie about why your child is absent -- Press 1

To make excuses for why your child did not do his work -- Press 2

To complain about what we do -- Press 3

To swear at staff members -- Press 4

To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in

your newsletter and several flyers mailed to you -- Press 5

If you want us to raise your child -- Press 6

If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone -- Press 7

To request another teacher for the third time this year -- Press 8

To complain about bus transportation -- Press 9

To complain about school lunches -- Press 10

If you realize this is the real world and your child must be accountable/ responsible for his/her own behavior, class work, homework, and that it's not the teachers' fault for your child(ren)'s lack of effort, hang up and have a nice day!'

very funny!

Very Funny
I may modify that for my HR Dept.

I think the teachers out there could appreciate it. Fran when you do modiify it can you please share it with us??? I would love to have a laugh. I can imagine how sick HR is of us and some of our questions.

amen!

thanks shamma...i feel for those guys...

HR Dept Automated Attendant:

To lie about why you suddenly can’t come in today -- Press 1

To make excuses for why you are late -- Press 2

To complain about your boss-- Press 3

To complain about your fellow staff members -- Press 4

To ask why no one told you were supposed to be here on time, not leave until quitting time or do the work you are assigned-- Press 5

If you want complain about your compensation -- Press 6

If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone -- Press 7

To request a transfer to another department for the third time this year -- Press 8

To complain about your commute-- Press 9

To complain about the company subsidized cafeteria food -- Press 10

....and yes over the years I have heard every one of these

WOW Fran that is funny, the things people call about, you would think you are not dealing with adults.

Love it!