oooo that would burn me too. i think i would have gone nuts on DH and let him know he needs to get to writing some TYs himself is his mom is being a snot about it.

let her be a biotch about it--but don't stress. and of course DH doesn't see it really at all because he probably wouldn't believe his mom is being so passive agressive.

You meantioned the stuff his mom collects is to give to him...so is there a chance this article was put aside for him to read and then act on....either way that was rather sneaky and uncalled for...any chance your hubby would take her not so suddle hint and start writing the thank yous?

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Posted by kns11

You meantioned the stuff his mom collects is to give to him...so is there a chance this article was put aside for him to read and then act on....either way that was rather sneaky and uncalled for...any chance your hubby would take her not so suddle hint and start writing the thank yous?

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Its hard to say who it was meant for ... it is possible he will write them out. He wrote out the e-party ones to his family.

Other items in today's bag included:

* 2 newspapers with real estate ads circled for houses in Lynbrook she wants us to look at.
(if you ask me, its cause we've been looking at Levittown and Bethpage and Farmingdale ... and she wants us to stay close by)

* A pair of pajamas for me ... that don't fit me ... b/c she doesn't know what size I wear. She buys the size I used to wear, before all the meds I've had to take over the last 9 months.

* A movie for DH to watch.

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Posted by MJDoc12
and of course DH doesn't see it really at all because he probably wouldn't believe his mom is being so passive agressive.

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fortunately, he does agree that its passive-aggressive. he just doesn't think its worth getting this worked up over.

we each deal with our families in VERY different ways.

i have no problem telling my parents EXACTLY what is on my mind, what i think about things. its how they raised me. they'd rather i was upfront and honest, than keep things buried inside.

on the other hand, DH & his family are the complete opposite of that. he would rather continue in the passive aggressive manner, and just not call her for 2 weeks, to 'punish her'

i also told DH that if i had a different relationship with his mom, i would be calling her to give her a piece of MY mind.

he says ... 'so you want me to call her for you?'

i want him to call b/c HE'S pizzzed about what she did .... not b/c i'm pizzed.

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Posted by PreshusSmurf

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Posted by kns11
You meantioned the stuff his mom collects is to give to him...so is there a chance this article was put aside for him to read and then act on....either way that was rather sneaky and uncalled for...any chance your hubby would take her not so suddle hint and start writing the thank yous?

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Its hard to say who it was meant for ... it is possible he will write them out. He wrote out the e-party ones to his family.

Other items in today's bag included:
* 2 newspapers with real estate ads circled for houses in Lynbrook she wants us to look at.
(if you ask me, its cause we've been looking at Levittown and Bethpage and Farmingdale ... and she wants us to stay close by)

* A pair of pajamas for me ... that don't fit me ... b/c she doesn't know what size I wear. She buys the size I used to wear, before all the meds I've had to take over the last 9 months.

* A movie for DH to watch.

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I hear you! Well since the pressure is coming from his mom, that should be the 1st one he writes.

That sounds like my mom. My mom cleans the house every weekend as she puts things aside to give (read as unload) on me/us. 1st off I live in an APARTMENT and 2nd she constantly tells me to throw stuff out so as to declutter. I've now resorted to packing her a bag everytime I see her and she is almost at the point.

Well she is thinking of you two and herself. We got three phone calls from DH mom in regards to real estate. 1st one- letting us know of a fixer upper down the block for them we should check out (DH laughed so hard) because he would never want to live that close. 2nd phone call-I'm touring this open house and I think it would be just perfect for you two...fireplace...jacuzzi...so DH is listening...he cuts her off and says so how much are they asking...oh only $699,999 it's a steal you know...UMMMMMM are you serious I'm a special ed teacher in a private school and your son is NYPD... . 3rd phone call- wow this is the perfect time to buy this house I am reading about one and it is ONLY $500,000. Does she realize that is 1/2 a MILLION dollars!!!!!! DH was so tempted to tell her to buy it for us since she thought it was a steal....AS IF

I'm sorry. My MIL did the same thing - complained the TYs weren't out. She didn't care that I could barely move for months. So I finally just wrote out the ones to everyone she would possibly talk to. Made her happy and got her off my back. The rest still need to go out. Maybe you can have DH write out the ones to his side so she'll lay off. It''ll get better.

eh i mean yea it's important to do thank you's but your not the only one around to do them. She should know your health and slap her son and inform him he is your partner now and it's his wedding too and his responsibility to do those thank you's as well.

Also, my mom (i go to my parents house daily since I have a outdoor turtle enclosure i specialty built for my turtles that now live outdoors for the entire summer and since we do not have a home of our own or yard we can use they allow me to keep my turtles there as long as i come over and feed and water them daily), will leave TONS of things for me to bring back. DH HATES this but I have no other way of dealing with it. She gives the same thing to my bro who is 10 years older then me married for over 10 years and lives miles away (she stock piles for him). I get a HUGE variety of stupid crap that she doesn't want so she gives to me. Most of it now doesn't make it to the door, just toss it.

I would call MIL and say 'thank you so much for the information' and since you know how important it is for me to get my TYs out in a timely manner I would appreciate you writing them for me.....when can we get together?
I will speak what I would like written in them & you can write them so that i do not cause anymore injury to my back or shoulder....i really appreciate you offering to help me! Can't wait to get together!'

........sorry you are dealing with this!

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Posted by HamptonsBride

I would call MIL and say 'thank you so much for the information' and since you know how important it is for me to get my TYs out in a timely manner I would appreciate you writing them for me.....when can we get together?
I will speak what I would like written in them & you can write them so that i do not cause anymore injury to my back or shoulder....i really appreciate you offering to help me! Can't wait to get together!'

........sorry you are dealing with this!

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OMG have I told you lately that I love you?!!!!

The thought of this seriously has me over here!

that would bother me too!

and also, i would get your DH involved in writing them too. i got stuck writing them ALL and it ******! if it's his mom complaining, then i think your DH needs to write them for you.

Sorry you have to deal with this- Passive-Agressive Manipulative People DEF suck!! FEEL BETTER!! As long as the people you love and care about understand then thats all that really matters!!

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Posted by donegal419

that would bother me too!

and also, i would get your DH involved in writing them too. i got stuck writing them ALL and it ******! if it's his mom complaining, then i think your DH needs to write them for you.

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i think that's what is going to have to happen ...

i'm a bit of a spiteful person though, if it was up to me, anyone who ASKED for a thank you would be the LAST to get one!

ooooh MIL's....aren't they the greatest???

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Posted by carolinebr

That is so f*cking spiteful that its actually funny. Its like something out of Everyone Loves Raymond.

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lol - SO true!!