Vent time!

Last night DH and I went to see a show. We got 2 extra tickets to give to our wedding coordinator and Dh's best friend (a girl). Well, when we got there DH's best friend just waved hi, but i hugged her and her sister (wedding coordinator) hello. His best friend acted like she didn't want to talk so i just made small talk with her sister instead. After the show we were all talking and then DH's best friend said bye and hugged my husband bye and then turned around walked away without saying goodbye to me. Her sister did hug me bye while her DH's best friend was walking away. I found that strange but really didn't care.I wasn't butt hurt at all.
The problem that i do have is that since we got married in March everytime DH calls her, she would ignore his calls. He would leave tons of message and not return any of his calls. But, she does complain 'oh he has no time or doesn't want to hang out since he got married' but complains to their mutual friends.

We have tried several times to make plans with her but she just flakes out all the time. At first I didn't think anything of her behaivor but now its a problem. She seems snotty with me when she does see me.

How should i approach this situation with DH?

i agree with Denise, there is no reason she should be acting that way, especially if your nice to her..saying hello, attempting small talk etc..

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Posted by GtBride

At first I taught she had feelings for him but, then i realized it was more like brother-sister bond. At the end of our reception she was crying like a little girl and then my husband asked her what was wrong she replied 'she just lost her best friend' he assured her that they will still be friend but i am his wife and apart of his life. I only been nice to this girl and gone out of my way to make conversation and she just seems to continue to be rude. What bothers me the most is she is spreading rumors that my husband has changed since he got married. She is single girl and i feel she is lonely and depressed.

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It sounds to me like she has feelings for him.

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Posted by soon2BMrsMcD

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Posted by GtBride

At first I taught she had feelings for him but, then i realized it was more like brother-sister bond. At the end of our reception she was crying like a little girl and then my husband asked her what was wrong she replied 'she just lost her best friend' he assured her that they will still be friend but i am his wife and apart of his life. I only been nice to this girl and gone out of my way to make conversation and she just seems to continue to be rude. What bothers me the most is she is spreading rumors that my husband has changed since he got married. She is single girl and i feel she is lonely and depressed.

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It sounds to me like she has feelings for him.

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DH doesn't has feeling for her like that. But, the way she has been acting makes me think she does but i guess i am in denial.

I just don't know how to address the situation.

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Posted by GtBride

At first I taught she had feelings for him but, then i realized it was more like brother-sister bond. At the end of our reception she was crying like a little girl and then my husband asked her what was wrong she replied 'she just lost her best friend' he assured her that they will still be friend but i am his wife and apart of his life. I only been nice to this girl and gone out of my way to make conversation and she just seems to continue to be rude. What bothers me the most is she is spreading rumors that my husband has changed since he got married. She is single girl and i feel she is lonely and depressed.

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yeah some single people expect things to stay the same and even when the friend is making an effort and still communicating and hanging out with them, the single friend isn't satisfied. In the past when they were all single they felt the friendship was different and they were able to hang out at any time, they were always at eachothers disposal and there wasnt a 3rd person getting in the middle of their friendship.

Honestly, this is not your problem. His friend needs to grow up and thats it. She has to get over the fact that he met you and is married now and cant hang out the same way he used to. She should instead see how youre actually a nice wife and trying to be friends with her too and understanding of their friendship, there are MANY wives who would not even put up with a female friend, this has been discussed on LIW and alot of women on here said they would not have it. She is just selfish is what it comes down to, instead of being happy for him which is what a friend should do in these situations, she is only thinking about herself. IF she were in a relationship she would be more understanding, but she is still living the single life and it can be hard when you had friends that were always around for everything and all of sudden they aren't, some of us can relate. But you have to get over that and accept reality. Have your DH tell her that as a friend he would expect her to be happy for him and that he feels if she was a true friend then she would NEVER disrespect you in any way and make you feel welcome and to accept that guess what LIFE GOES ON!!!! get over it and deal with it, does she expect all her friends to remain single for the rest of their lives and only hanging out together. I can tell her type bc i know of people like this too, even when DH and i started dating, some made comments like 'ugh you better not forget about your friends now' that was their first reaction to him having a serious relationship not oh i am happy for you or anything like that. But its their stupidity bc if they had those reactions then they are the ones who lost out on a friendship with DH. I wasnt making any effort with any of these people and yes females too. Only one female friend actually called DH and said congrats when we got engaged at a time they knew he would be with me, not others calling only when he was at work or emailing and she invited both of us out to dinner and said to tell me congrats too. Needless to say the rest of them are not a part of his life anymore. And not even my choice but he did it on his own, or i should say they did it to themselves. I dont care for any of those biatches lol and just have no patience for their immature views. I know some did have feelings for him and that was their excuse and others are just biatches and no real excuse.

If I were you then I'd stop even making an effort, you already did more than enough and if she is still gonna act this way then forget her. Let your DH know how hurt and upset you are about this and as his wife you expect him to make sure you arent put in those situations again to feel this way. Once he sees that you will stop making the effort and dont care for the friend at all and dont care to be around her, then he knows he will have to do something. He obviously wont be able to invite her out again bc he will be afraid of any problems. He would have to talk to her first