For the moms to be.... When and how are you telling them at work- and what is your line of work. I am in advertising and it has been a horrible year and a half. Lots of layoffs which leads us 'lucky' ones to work later and later and no raises in sight.
I am about 8 weeks now and have begun wearing clothes a size bigger. Mornin sickness lasts until 2or 3pm but only nausea so far- thank goodness! Tired ,tired . I know I will need to EVENTUALLY tell the boss when I start to show, but I am trying to plan my stratedegy now. I read that u should try to do it after any particular upnote, uptrend you may have contirbuted to. What are you planning on? (I am waiting for an updated handbk to find out what our materity policy is)
BriarRose
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Re: when r u telling them at work ?
I find out that we were expecting on Halloween. I told my boss three days before christmas and my coworkers the week after New Years. When I told my boss about the pregnancy I assured her that I am planning to return to work full time. I told her I would be taking my six weeks maternity leave granted by the company and that I would not be using my FMLA time as it is unpaid and DH and I cannot afford 12 weeks without my paycheck. I think it's best to speak with your job when you have a better idea of what your intentions are. I noticed that my boss was a lot less nervous when I spoke to her about what I was planning. Since I work in retail I think it makes a big difference that I will not be out during our busy season so our managers and sales associates will survive in my abscence. I simply pulled my boss aside and told her that I would have to leave early or come in late once a month for my ob appt and that I would like to reduce my hours. ( I shortend my week from 40 hours to 35) I was having hard time keeping it together cause I was so tired and wanted to go to her about the situation before she thought I was just performing poorly for no reason. Let us know how it goes!!!
anna
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Re: when r u telling them at work ?
Phyl,
The words I received from a good friend, who has 2 children and is at a senior executive level, 'wait as long as you can before telling everyone at work'. I'm unemployed so i dont have to worry about that right now, but I am 20 weeks and not showing at all. Depending on your work situation and relationships, you should wait as long as you can. This friend of mine also mentioned that, based on her epxerience, people start treating you very differently, alot of 'how are you feeling' and not being invited to meetings or certain functions, but i'm sure politics like that vary WIDELY depending on the company. She just hated the feeling of being considered 'less than par' or just below the average during her pregnancy. I dont mean to discourage you from anything, enjoy your pregnancy, enjoy every single minute, you have a precious miracle happening inside your belly !! i am enjoying every flutter and movement. But telling so early on might not be the best idea. Youre only 8 weeks so far, you can wait till at LEAST 15 weeks, maybe more. You really need to make the decision based on your relationship with your boss, do you think he/she is going to treat you differently, not give you the XYZ project to work on thats coming up, etc etc.
And then again on the other end of the spectrum, as briarose mentioned, it would help for them to know so that can cut your hours down a bit and they wont think youre slacking off.
Good luck in whatever you decide, keep us posted !!
TUMMY PATS :) Anna
PS-Im kinda job hunting (cabin fever!) and my dilemma is if i get a job, when do i tell them ! In 4 more weeks, i wont have much to hide ! LOL.
Jenn Z.
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Re: when r u telling them at work ?
I work in the corporate office of a small chain of retail clothing stores. I told my boss at the three month mark. As with everyone else, I wanted him to know the reasons behind my sluggishness around the office. I am still undecided about what I'm doing after the baby is born. This place has a number of part timers, and work-at-home people and my job can easily be done this way, so I told my boss that I would be back in some way.
phyl
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advice..
thanks for the advice. Actually, I wouldn't mind at all if they took a project or 2 off my desk! Trouble is that my boss- the owner of this small offshoot adv company, has NO IDEA what the spot dept does. ( we negotiate media time on cable, tv, radio, internet for our clients). She is the only person I have ever met that is in her position & was not a spot negoitiator! becuase of that agmonst other quirks, she underappreciates our whole dept- which was cut in half back in oct-nov. No raises yet- and I will be here 2 years in august. same old litinany- there are no jobs in our industry so be GLAD u r working. That is starting to get tired around here & there is at least one person seriously considering leaving. Hard to work this way when you are a manager and u have to boost morale. Good thing is that my client is very happy with me...and I work very closely with them. They just awarded us a nice increase in reveneue spending starting immediately- and it was ALL due to me. I will hold out as long as I can- and have to consider my options- and what will also work for the company too. (how come I only feel quesy on work days- hmmm?)
Elizabeth
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Re: advice..
In my position, it was in my best interest to tell them earlier. There have been some shake ups going on and one of my bosses left. A few people have since left the company and it was job protection for me in a way to tell them. Should there be some layoffs within my group, it would be more chancey for them to layoff a pregnant woman than a non-pregnant one. Even if the layoff was not discriminatory, the perception of what the company did would be poorly viewed. I get 12 weeks leave at 100% salary which I understandably want to be able to utilize. So I think your individual circumstances really play a part in when you share the news at work.
