XOXO

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Posted by GinaZ

plan it yourself but invite them.

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ITA. Tell her you have everything under control.

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Posted by Espo22

well if its at your house and parents find out you didnt invite them they might get upset, you know them best so would they get upset? If its small and just a few ppl then you dont have to invite the WHOLE extended family but again depends on how big it will be. I understand you dont want her to take over but honestly she doesnt have to at all, she can only take over if you let her. If you involve her in the planning then you are risking that. Just do it all yourself and tell her after you have planned everything, basically at that point just tell her when and where to show up.

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dh only has a small # of friends that i would invite...but he is friendly with friends of his friends so i would tell certain ppl they could bring so and so etc... so all in all i could see abou 25-30 ppl just with friends & friends of friends

plus knowing dh & friends, it will not be a quiet party!!

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Posted by LuvMyAlfonse

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Posted by seeecretnameeeee

i really like the idea of planning everything and then telling mil - but i feel like she will be super upset that i didnt tell her earlier

this is such a catch 22

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Be all excited when you tell her.

Be like 'On Nov 1st I am throwing my first birthday party for my husband... I am so excited that I was able to do this...he's so great and I love him so much. I really wanted to be able to plan something for him to show how much I appreciate him. I'll be sending out formal invites to you guys but I just wanted to give you a heads up. I am SO excited.'

Hopefully then she won't be a witch and rain on your party parade.

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Wow that is a great approach!!!

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Posted by LuvMyAlfonse

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Posted by seeecretnameeeee

i really like the idea of planning everything and then telling mil - but i feel like she will be super upset that i didnt tell her earlier

this is such a catch 22

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Be all excited when you tell her.

Be like 'On Nov 1st I am throwing my first birthday party for my husband... I am so excited that I was able to do this...he's so great and I love him so much. I really wanted to be able to plan something for him to show how much I appreciate him. I'll be sending out formal invites to you guys but I just wanted to give you a heads up. I am SO excited.'

Hopefully then she won't be a witch and rain on your party parade.

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ITA with this!! if you sound really excited (which it sounds like you are) she couldnt possibly want to rain on your parade!!!!!

good luck

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Posted by Espo22

it all depends on where you're having it. If its out at a lounge for example then that would be more for friends. IF its at a hall and more formal then i think family should be invited bc if they find out then that can cause alot of problems and you dont want to cause those problems. What i would do though is not tell her now and just send her an invite, by that point everything is planned and you did the guestlist so she cant come and change anything. If its at home then again they might get a bit upset, unless you do something smaller and just have your friends over and if she finds out just say that some friends came over for his bday.

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yep! i agree! if u're doing it in a loung/club/bar atmosphere i would do it with friends....and NOT make it a big secret from MIL or family (because then it'll just look like u were trying to keep them out of it)...if u do plan on doing it at a hall or rest. definetly invite family but do what denise said....don't tell her now..call her right before u mail out invites & just say 'Just wanted to give u a heads up that u'll be getting an invite to DH's party'..etc... that way she can't take over/invite more people/take credit lol.

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Posted by SB7308

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Posted by GinaZ

plan it yourself but invite them.

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ITA. Tell her you have everything under control.

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Exactly!