2 Great Things Happened Today and 1 bad thing...

1. Remember about two weeks ago, when I posted that my diamond had fallen out of my ring and Zales wanted to send it away for a week? Well, today I was on my lunch break and I got it fixed at Major jewelers in an hour!!! Only $18 too! So, I'm so happy to have my ring back to normal!!!

2. I got my Save The Date cards in today!!!!! AAAAAHHHH So exciting! Here's a link to where I posted what they look like before...http://www.liweddings.com/chat/topic.aspx?ID=201018

3. Well there's a boy that I work with and when I first got engaged he said, 'I can't wait to go to your wedding'. I never though he was actually serious. Then a few months ago, he said, 'Oh my God, I have to put my day in now to take off so I am first in line to make sure I can go to your wedding'. I was upset the first time he invited himself to the wedding, the second time I had to say something. So I said, 'I'm sorry, but I'm not sure how many people I can really invite because we are paying for the entire thing ourselves, so it's probably just going to be strictly close friends and family.' In between then and now I found some interesting informaiton out that he told my boss basically that I was interviewing elsewhere, etc. So I was really upset with him. So obviously, now there's no way in the world I am inviting him. So today I get my STD cards and I'm showing one of my friends at work and he grabs the card and says, 'Should I take this now or are you just going to send this to my house?' I started sweating and didn't know what to say, so I blew it off and was like, ' You're crazy' (I always say this when I'm nervous) and he said, 'What do you mean I'm crazy, does this mean you are not inviting me to the wedding?' and I didn't know what to say so I said it again. Then he says, 'I'm going to put my day off in next week so I can make sure that I can go'. I just laughed it off in an innocent way. Girls, I don't know what to do!!! I thought I gave him enough hints. I can't believe he has the nerve to just invite himself! I would never do this. What do I do?HELP!

I just re-read my post, I am not trying to make it sound like you getting invited is a privelege or he's not good enough, etc. We really just aren't that close and after I found out what he did, there's no way in the world I'm inviting him. HELP HELP HELP!

You need to be honest with him.

If you aren't inviting all of your coworkers you have to be careful talking about the wedding at work. Ie bringin in invites, brochures, save the dates, etc leads people to think they are all going to be invited.

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Posted by coxmandi

You need to be honest with him.

If you aren't inviting all of your coworkers you have to be careful talking about the wedding at work. Ie bringin in invites, brochures, save the dates, etc leads people to think they are all going to be invited.

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I agree! I caught myself 'sharing' too much wedding info at work. When my invitation proof came in, my invitation lady faxed it to me. Of course, the first thing I did was yell out 'OH MY GOD, MY WEDDING INVITATION IS HERE AND IT'S PERFECT!'

Later, I realized that it was wrong to 'show off' my stuff to people whom I wasn't going to invite...but, boy was I bored at work!!!

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Posted by DayBeforeThanksgiving

1. Remember about two weeks ago, when I posted that my diamond had fallen out of my ring and Zales wanted to send it away for a week? Well, today I was on my lunch break and I got it fixed at Major jewelers in an hour!!! Only $18 too! So, I'm so happy to have my ring back to normal!!!

2. I got my Save The Date cards in today!!!!! AAAAAHHHH So exciting!

3. Well there's a boy that I work with and when I first got engaged he said, 'I can't wait to go to your wedding'. I never though he was actually serious. Then a few months ago, he said, 'Oh my God, I have to put my day in now to take off so I am first in line to make sure I can go to your wedding'. I was upset the first time he invited himself to the wedding, the second time I had to say something. So I said, 'I'm sorry, but I'm not sure how many people I can really invite because we are paying for the entire thing ourselves, so it's probably just going to be strictly close friends and family.' In between then and now I found some interesting informaiton out that he told my boss basically that I was interviewing elsewhere, etc. So I was really upset with him. So obviously, now there's no way in the world I am inviting him. So today I get my STD cards and I'm showing one of my friends at work and he grabs the card and says, 'Should I take this now or are you just going to send this to my house?' I started sweating and didn't know what to say, so I blew it off and was like, ' You're crazy' (I always say this when I'm nervous) and he said, 'What do you mean I'm crazy, does this mean you are not inviting me to the wedding?' and I didn't know what to say so I said it again. Then he says, 'I'm going to put my day off in next week so I can make sure that I can go'. I just laughed it off in an innocent way. Girls, I don't know what to do!!! I thought I gave him enough hints. I can't believe he has the nerve to just invite himself! I would never do this. What do I do?HELP!

I just re-read my post, I am not trying to make it sound like you getting invited is a privelege or he's not good enough, etc. We really just aren't that close and after I found out what he did, there's no way in the world I'm inviting him. HELP HELP HELP!

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Glad your ring was repaired (and cheap too) gotta love that. Congrats on the STD's. post pics???

As for the hopefully soon to be ex coworker - try saying:

'Are you serious? What the F are you thinking? We are not friends and we are not even close coworkers. Not to mention, I know you told our boss that I'm interviewing for another job. There is no f---ing way I'm inviting you to my wedding and paying for you to celebrate with me. I've been dropping subtle hints for months but either you are too dense to get it or you just want me to be rude about it. Get a clue!'


I found this helpful too.

Dear Employees:

It has been brought to the partners' attention that some individuals throughout the firm have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their co-workers. Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated. We do, however. realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers.

Therefore, a list of 18 New and Innovative 'TRY SAYING' phrases have been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.

1) TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.

INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the f___ you're doing.

2) TRY SAYING: She's an aggressive go-getter.

INSTEAD OF: She's a f___ing bit__.

3) TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.

INSTEAD OF: And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?

4) TRY SAYING: I'm certain that isn't feasible.

INSTEAD OF: No f___ing way.

5) TRY SAYING: Really?

INSTEAD OF: You've got to be sh___ing me!

6) TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with...

INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a sh__.

7) TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project.

INSTEAD OF: It's not my f___ing problem.

8) TRY SAYING: That's interesting.

INSTEAD OF: What the f___?

9) TRY SAYING: I'm not sure this can be implemented.

INSTEAD OF: this sh__ won't work.

10) TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that.

INSTEAD OF: Why the f___ didn't you tell me sooner?

11) TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the issues.

INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his a__.

12) TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?

INSTEAD OF: Eat sh__ and die.

13) TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?

INSTEAD OF: Kiss my a__.

14) TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.

INSTEAD OF: F__ it, I'm on salary.

15) TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.

INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your a__.

16) TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.

INSTEAD OF: This f___ing job *****.

17) TRY SAYING: You want me to take care of that?

INSTEAD OF: Who the f___ died and made you boss?

18) TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.

INSTEAD OF: He's a pr_ck.


Thank You,

Human Resources

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Posted by Colleen Hines

I strongly suggest you get him the name of a really good pyschiatrist who prescribes lithium-

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Unfortunately I am in a similar situation. This girl I used to work with (still work for the same company, am in a different building) kept asking me for pictures, I want pictures, let me get a picture. She even offered to come to my house and take pics of me (she's an amateur photog), finally I said 'maybe you can come the morning of and take pics before the church'...but she doesn't drive and I was counting on saying no but she said 'great, I'll find someone to take me'...long story short I ended up inviting her on a whim and I so regret it. I felt pressured but I should have stood my ground. We are way over our limit and she's the only person FH won't know. The invites went out today and I wish I hadn't sent her one...but I would have felt worse.
Please learn from me...tell him to f off and sorry, you're not that close to me...otherwise you'll regret it (like me).

There's a guy I work with that always teased me right after the wedding in front of other work friends (out at lunch - they no longer actually work at my company) - 'How come they were invited and I wasn't' - I just keep saying I only invited people from work that I also see outside of work. When is the last time you met me for Happy Hour or for lunch? That usually gets him to stop. But its annoying- the wedding was 5 mos. ago and he still says things. I guess he's probably teasing but it puts you in a really bad spot. So just keep persisting that you're only inviting people you hang out with outside of work. Hope that helps, not sure if it did.

SO Glad to hear you got your diamond re-set. what a nightmare that must have been! Thank GOD you found the diamond!!

you've got be honest and up front, because he is clearly unable to take a hint.

Just tell him that 1. you're not looking for a new job and you should ask him why he's spreading that rumor. and 2. that you're limited to the # of people you can invite and that you're sorry, but you can't invite him.

You'll feel better after it's been done.

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Posted by DayBeforeThanksgiving

Oh, forgot to add that when I mentioned that we were on a tight budget and paying for the entire thing ourselves, so we wer eonly inviting close friends and family, he offered to pay for his plate!!! How tacky!

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Do you think he was serious??? You should see if he really writes you a check - that would make for a really funny post !!! How often does he mention your wedding to you? Sounds like more often than you do!

First of all...Yeah!!! Your ring is back to normal!!!

STD's <---(Still so weird typing that...) Yeah!!!

Ok...now with this guy at work...unbelievable!!! Definitely stick to your guns about not inviting him...especially after what he did to you by telling your boss you're out looking for another job!!! What a punk! AND for him to have the nerve to invite himself in the first place let alone after he did that!!!.... I would hate to be in your position, but stand strong...if anything we can all go kick some butt!

this is simple to me.

he has no friends and nothing better to do. as do some of my very own co-workers.

you simply don't invite him- if he asks 'jokingly' say Tuff. he doesn't get a STD, or an invitation.

The nerve of some poeple, being so insensitive to a wedding celebration! if you wanted him there, you would have issued him a STD. GOD........

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Posted by DayBeforeThanksgiving

Oh, forgot to add that when I mentioned that we were on a tight budget and paying for the entire thing ourselves, so we wer eonly inviting close friends and family, he offered to pay for his plate!!! How tacky!

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I would watch your back with this guy. Don't let him sabotage your job.

Why is it that some people can't pick up on subtle nuances of human behaviors and conversations?

First of all, I would NEVER assume I was invited to anything unless someone flat out said so OR if they asked for my address for their guest list - especially if someone said that they could not afford to invite everyone.

Secondly, why do people want to go to weddings THAT badly that they would impose themselves upon people and then offer to pay themselves? That is pathetic. If you wanna hear good music, eat and dance, go to the Rainbow Room and leave brides alone!!!!

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Posted by coxmandi

You need to be honest with him.

If you aren't inviting all of your coworkers you have to be careful talking about the wedding at work. Ie bringin in invites, brochures, save the dates, etc leads people to think they are all going to be invited.

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I agree..it doesn't help either that he can't take a hint. You need to be direct with him.

ETA: And congrats on the other two things!

i keep doing this at work... i keep telling my secretaries stuff that is going on, and then catch myself. they totally hear me talk to vendors and they listen to my stuff.

i really don't know who i'll be able to invite and don't want to make anyone feel bad in the process. but another year of this? i'm nervous!!!!

i would tell him the next time he says anything. i'd say, 'honestly, i can not have that many people and I don't mean to hurt your feelings....etc.'