2 Questions about inviting coworkers

1) For those of you who have a secretary or personal assistant, are you inviting him or her to your wedding? I couldn't stand my former secretary but I have a new secretary now for the past few months who is great. She is about my age and we get along very well and talk a lot about my wedding plans. The only problem is that I know she is pretty broke and lives in NJ and would probably have to book a hotel for the night and pay a sitter for her kids. I don't want her to feel like she has to give me a gift or even go to the wedding if she can't afford the trip.

2) I work for 8 separate partners to varying degrees. The head of my department, who I unfortunately work with quite a bit, is a pain in the a$$ and I would prefer not to invite him. Also, I've been told that he is having an affair and getting a divorce from his wife. Actually, this is pretty common knowledge around the firm. So I have no idea if I should invite him as Mr. and Mrs. John Doe or Mr. John Doe and Guest. So: (a) do I have to invite him if I am inviting other (more junior) partners that I work with? and (b) if I do invite him, should I invite him with his wife or with a guest??

Thanks!!

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Posted by september2004

Based on your descriptions I would invite the personal assistant and no partners. Let the assistant decided whether or not she can afford to come. Sometimes it it 'politically wise' to invite certain individuals, but it doesn't sound like you have to worry about it in this case...

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I totally agree!!!!!!!!!! Let the assistant decide and you know the answer to inviting the others.

Invite those you get along with mutually...same dilemma in my office except we have 2 secy's and 2 bosses, plus other stragglers from different departments, my FH does not want any of them to come he does not like them because I have b****ed about them in the past but hey its office politics yet he has loads coming from his office...I'm torn like you, I have to return to work with these people and don't want to offend them it's like you invite the group or none of them..good luck