Do your nieces and nephews call anyone other than blood relation 'Aunt' and 'Uncle'? Such as, the friends of your brother or sister?
My sister instructed her kids to call her new friend 'Aunt ______' and it drives me batty. This friend is not a friend of the whole family. As a matter of fact, the rest of the family doesn't like her at all.
I could maybe understand a friend of the whole family, which we've had. We never called them Aunt and Uncle. Hell, my mother NAMED me after one of them and we don't call her Aunt Patricia.
After all the years of being an Aunt to these kids, helping raise them even, and my sister befriends some biotch and decides she deserves to be called an Aunt to these kids?
Would you be pissed or am I being too sensitive?
eta: This woman has been a friend of my sister's for less than a year.
CLMon7906
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
omg...so FILs are name/title nazis...seriously, they are...
his mom got mad that i would send her letters and thank you notes to her first name...then once we got engaged, they demanded i call them mom and dad...but no one is comfortable with that (FBILs/FSIL and FH) really....anyway....
but to make me feel more unattached all this time, the kid(s) she babysits calls her aunt rosalind...well, she now calls her ARA (ay-rah). to the point that when the parents call and i answer the phone, they ask for ARA not for rosalind!!! geez....anyway...but i am supposed to call her mrs. lastname???
i think it's weird to call people unrelated your aunt or uncle PERSONALLY.
neener1211
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
I don't have any neices or nephews...BUT...my mom and dad both have 4 brothers and sisters each...and my mom has a really good friend that we have called Aunt Monica since we were born. But, she is the only friend of my parents that we call aunt.
If is just a random friend, I would say that is weird...but if it is her bestest friend...I would say that it is ok.
103005FallBride
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
YES! I HATE that! I don't think you're being too sensitive at all!
When the kids were younger they would, but now as they're getting older...they know to only call me Aunt...
BrideInBlue
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
It does seem strange. My cousins daughter calls me aunt but thats family your sisters friend is different. Are her kids very young? Maybe she thought it was easier to make her faimialr to them as an 'aunt'? I dont know either way its kind of weird seeing as shes known he so shortly.
MrsMagoo
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
Posted by neener1211
If is just a random friend, I would say that is weird...but if it is her bestest friend...I would say that it is ok.
I agree...
greenfreak
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
I have been a constant in these kid's lives since they were born, I even lived with them, sacrificed for them and helped raise them. None of these friends can say that, none of them have been witness and part of their lives since day 1.
The youngest is 5 and the oldest is 14 so they're old enough to know that she's not their Aunt. One of them even told me that they don't want to call her Aunt but their Mom corrects them whenever they don't!
My sister places her friends at a higher priority than family which is the root of all this. But funny, none of those friends have lasted more than, say, 3 years.
But on they other hand, they've been calling DH 'Uncle' for the 7 years we've been together, unmarried. If we hadn't made it to the point of marriage, or broke up even, how would it be any different?
For someone like me who doesn't plan on having children, these kids are as close as I'm going to get. So I place more than normal importance on them. That's why I can't tell if I'm being overly sensitive or not.
klingklang77
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
i hear you. my sister doesnt do that with her kids, and my family always grew up calling anyone without blood relation (like my mothers friends) mr. or mrs.
my FHs family on the other hand, does this and i do not like it. he was suggesting that FHs brother be called 'uncle' and i told him no, that isnt what we do in our family. it was kind of wierd, but he understood.
Katie&Chris2006
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
Being that it is kind of a random friend, I would be annoyed. Growing up I called (and still do) my mom's best friend Aunt Maureen...but that's because she was more part of the family than anything else. My FH's best friend (who considers him her brother) has two little girls who call us Aunt and Uncle.
mycrayon1
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
Posted by neener1211
I don't have any neices or nephews...BUT...my mom and dad both have 4 brothers and sisters each...and my mom has a really good friend that we have called Aunt Monica since we were born. But, she is the only friend of my parents that we call aunt.
If is just a random friend, I would say that is weird...but if it is her bestest friend...I would say that it is ok.
I couldn't agree more. FMIL has a friend who moved away and her granchild comes over a lot to visit with FMIL. The baby will probably call her something else, but she said 'Aunt' wouldn't be bad. That was right after she gave us her 'order' for a granddaughter (not grandson or grandchild) of her own we were engaged for less than 3 hours keep in mind!! I love my FMIL thank God!
October Bliss
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
Are you being overly sensitive??? Yes and no. My immediate reaction when I read the post was NO, absolutely not. My niece just had her first b-day, and my sister's friends were all there and she kept saying things like 'oh, do you want to go to Aunt Christine?' It was making me absolutely nuts. Granted, Christine & my sister have been friends for 20 years, but it was still making me absolutely nuts.
As I continued to read your post however, my brain kicked into gear and I realized my flowergirl calls me Aunt Darlene. Her mom and I have been friends since the 8th grade. So, now I'm asking myself, how upset should I be over by biological niece calling someone else 'aunt' when a child not related by blood calls me the same thing????????????????
ETA: When we were growing up, we either called our mother's friends Mrs. A, or by their first name alone. It was simply a matter of when we first met them. I remember introducing a friend of mine to my mom's friends at a party @ 10 years ago, and I went around the room and said: This is Patty, and Carol, and Susan, and Mrs. Smith, and Jane, and Mary. When I was done I realized that I had only introduced ONE person as Mrs. - but it was because I had been introduced to her that way when I was 3, and never referred to her by her first name as a matter of respect. I guess in today's day and age people are more relaxed and don't use Mr. or Mrs., but aren't quite comfortable enough to just use first names at a young age???
ssdbk
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
I totally understand. I have an acquaintance who makes her daughter call me 'Aunt Kerie' and I'm not comfortable with it. If it was a good friend, it would be fine, but still not really my style. My own neice and nephew do not use the term Aunt. They just use my first name. I like to be very informal so that does not bother me at all, but if anyone calls me Aunt, it should be them!
julybride06
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
I don't think that's right. I would be upset too.
MrsH1156
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
I really don't know if you're being sensitive or not. I do think it's up to your sister what her kids call friends though. My best friends daughter calls me Aunt and I'm not a blood relative. My kids will call her Aunt as well. It's just a matter of personal preference.
LaurenluvsTJ
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
My mom had a really good friend that she knew since she was a kid and me and my brother called her 'Aunt Irene.' I knew she wasn't really my Aunt. She wasn't close to anyone in the family except my mom and dad (she actually introduced them).
OctoberPrincess2006
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
Posted by neener1211
I don't have any neices or nephews...BUT...my mom and dad both have 4 brothers and sisters each...and my mom has a really good friend that we have called Aunt Monica since we were born. But, she is the only friend of my parents that we call aunt.
If is just a random friend, I would say that is weird...but if it is her bestest friend...I would say that it is ok.
I agree.
DandS
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
Posted by DMartocello
Posted by neener1211
If is just a random friend, I would say that is weird...but if it is her bestest friend...I would say that it is ok.
I agree...
I also agree with this
JambaLady
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
I think it just depends on how you were raised and what you are comfortable with. In my culture, you call anyone older than you 'Aunt' or 'Uncle' out of respect for your elders. My nieces and nephews called my DH 'Uncle' before we were engaged and I called all my mom and dad's friends 'Aunt' and 'Uncle'. It shouldn't make you feel any less important or special because they will always know what role you play versus what role your sister's friend plays. I will always have special place in my heart for my 'real' aunts and uncles. And I adore, to the point of obsession, my own nieces and nephews, but I would never expect their 'honorary' aunt to refer to them as their 'niece' or 'nephew'.
I think it depends on what your sister's intent is. Is she just asking them to call her friend that out of respect and to be polite? If so, I would try not to let it upset you so much.
JGirl11297
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
My best friend had a baby a year ago and the baby calls me and FH aunt and uncle...and my mom's best friend has always been known as my aunt, and I never really thought anything of it, but again these are friends that are as close as family, if they were just a friend you see once in a while, I would not have them called aunt or uncle...
M&LSept1606
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Re: A question for the AUNTS
I think you're being too sensitive.
No matter what they call you or anyone else, you are their real aunt.
I can understand where you are coming from. I have 8 neices and nephews, but I think you're reading into it a bit too much.
