A week and a half before my wedding - I don't need this aggravation!
Original post by ewickens
I'm so livid right now I can't even think straight.
Over the weekend (yesterday to be exact), one of my bridesmaids called and left a message on my phone. Due to the activities going on, I didn't get a chance to call her back.
So, my MOH e-mailed me at the office today and asked me if I had heard from said bridesmaid. I said I got the message, but that was it and then my MOH called me at my office.
One week and a half before my wedding and this bridesmaid tells my MOH that she won't be getting her hair done at the salon and wanted to know how I would take it since she still hadn't told me, yet. My MOH told her that this was just bad, that I'm spending all this money on the photography, and that it's a week and a half before the wedding, and that the entire bridal party has known about this for 3 months and now she says something????
This is just one more thing to add to the long list of problems I've dealt with, with this BM.
Then, she's complaining to my MOH that she took her dress to get altered elsewhere and they did a shi*tty job and took it back to Helen's for them to redo and that cost more money and that she should have been told by me how much all of this was going to cost!!!!! My MOH said she knew when she agreed to be a BM what it would entail and that if she couldn't afford it, she shouldn't say yes. My BM is now avoiding me and she hasn't even spoken to me about this, she had my MOH do it!
I don't even know what to do! I'm almost tempted to buy the dress off of her and just not have her in the wedding.
shellnroc
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Re: A week and a half before my wedding - I don't need this aggravation!
Awww...so sorry Betsy you have to deal with this un-needed stress!!!!!!!!!!
I had a BM that complained about her dress and how much her alterations were going to be...blah blah..blah.
Yes, weddings are extremely expensive and being a BM can be very costly. But, If you can't afford it, then you shouldn't say yes IMHO.
Try not to Stress about this Sweetie. Enjoy the days you have left leading to your BIG DAY!!!
ali120206
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Re: A week and a half before my wedding - I don't need this aggravation!
I'm sorry you have to deal with this! If this was the only issue you had with this BM, I'd find a way to work around it but, since this is one in a list of many, I'd definitely ask her to step down. Having only two BMs isn't bad, since they are people you want to have standing beside you on your wedding day!
ETA: I think if it was really about money, she would've spoke to you about it herself instead of going through your MOH.
AlmostMrsKelly
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Re: A week and a half before my wedding - I don't need this aggravation!
Posted by franksgirl323
Posted by ewickens
So, let's say I do ask her to step down and I get her dress from her.
I would have 2 bridal party members with 4 groomsmen - would this seem odd?
Not odd at all Betsy...you can have one bridesmaid walk in with two groomsmen (one on each arm). I don't have an even party either and this is what we are doing. BTW: to you!!!!
and by the way, I wouldn't buy the dress either....she caused this, so its her loss sorry to say!
i absolutely agree. it's amazing how people show their true colors during the most important times in our lives. and it really sux to be surprised... people you think are your friends and who are concerned about your happiness, really aren't. it's common knowledge that if you are in someone's bridal party, it's going to cost you $$. but i think that if you are in someone's bridal party, it should be an honor. it shouldn't be about the money, but about standing beside them during one of the biggest days of their life. if she couldn't afford it, she shouldn't have accepted the part. and the way she is b!tching about the money, and how she's going through your MOH and whatnot just shows her lack of maturity. if it were me, especially this being the last straw so to speak, i'd be thinking of asking her to step down. i think i'd be giving some serious thought to why i asked her in the first place and how much the friendship really means. good luck with your decision
JohnnysGirl350
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Re: A week and a half before my wedding - I don't need this aggravation!
I just sent FM...
ellebelle1
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Re: A week and a half before my wedding - I don't need this aggravation!
Just to lend a different opinion, I don't think you can make someone get their hair done. It is pricey and I don't think it ruins pics at all. Two of my bm's did their hair themselves because of cost and I completely understood. They are beautiful girls, so in no way did it alter my pics. You would never know in a million years.
BKtoLI
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Re: A week and a half before my wedding - I don't need this aggravation!
I told you months ago and will say it again....life is too short and your wedding day is too precious to have someone around that might ruin it or is too miserable to be around.
She should be coming to you with any concerns instead of telling your MOH to relay it to you. And her past track record seems to speak for itself. Cut her off out of the wedding party. You will likely feel a whole lot more better than you think.
As for the uneven ratio, my brother had 2 girls & 4 guys and it was fine. We each got escorted by 2 guys, and it was not a big deal.