there are always tons of commercials in San Diego (I see it on the Chicago station too)asking people to adopt a child (older) - that it doesn't matter if you are single, married, race, etc (I think they are implying that it doens't matter if you are gay either, but thats just MHO)
I think that maybe we should wait until we have gone through the parenthood process, so if we adopted a 4 year old...we would know some of the issues they are going through...
I also thought of cultural issues...b/c of our location I would think that there are a lot of Mexican babies (mothers come into the country to have the child born American)...but would it be fair not to raise the child in a different culture (although DH is Spanish, so there would be a lot of similarities)
I'm not thinking of doing this anytime soon...but the commercials always get me thinking and I was wondering what your thoughts are...
dandj
Posted:
Member since
Re: adoption...older child
I think that if someone is up for the challenges of raising an older child - they should go for it. They just need to be aware that regardless of the childs background, there will always be adjustment issues, some of the children may have learning or psychological difficulties, etc... and it just isn't instant happy family. I work with a special ed population and many are foster children/adopted. I think its wonderful though that people would consider adopting older children and not just babies, but I also think its hard work, but a labor of love.
IrishTracy
Posted:
Member since
Re: adoption...older child
My cousin is in the process of adopting from what I heard she wanted an older child. (she lives in Ireand so I don't know all the details) She is getting a girl from China.
Another cousin just adopted her second daughter from China. Because the process takes so long for them (in Ireland) they don't get them until they are a year 1/2. (I know that's not considered older) But her first daughter did have problems. She didn't want to stay in the crib. (In China they leave them in there most of the day) But, with a little time the trust took over & she is very well adjusted!
My BIL's cousin had 3 adopted children in Seattle & they wanted children of diffrent races. They have a boy who is from Panama, another boy who's father was black (his mother was white) & a girl who's mexican. Obviously they know they are adopted & the parents buy books about the childrens cultures so that they do know about their heritage.
I hope my rambling helps!
Fran M
Posted:
Member since
Re: adoption...older child
There are tons of books on this subject. There are many things to consider attachment, birth order, legal risks the list goes on and on. If you are considering adopting an older child you might want to strart your reading. Adopting a toddler or preschooler adds an entire new set of things to deal with in addition to being 2 - 4 years old.
