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Am I a dead beat bridesmaid?

Ronkonkomonga Posted:

Am I a dead beat bridesmaid?

My friend and I are in eachothers wedding. She lives in Ohio and has a wedding party made up of 7 girls - each living in a different state. I have only met one other bridemaid, and she lives in Alabama.
I've gotten one or two emails regarding the wedding party, and I was really great about getting my dress. But I realized that I really didn 't help or call at all to find out if I should help with the shower, which is next weekend. It kind of just crept up on me.


My question is, do I have to go to the shower if I'm in the wedding party. It is in Rochester - which I would probably have fly up to get there from here. Or can I just send a gift. I wouldn't expect her to fly in for my shower, but is it shabby that I don't go to hers?
FunBride Posted:

Re: Am I a dead beat bridesmaid?

I'm in a similar situation (except i'm the bride and my FSIL is from OHIO) and she is not flying in for my shower OR my bachelorette party. Not that I care, b/c I was doing my FMIL a favor by asking her in the first place, but i think it's fair she wouldn't be traveling in since she's an out of stater. No worries for you, at all!! Just send a gift and nice card.

eric'sbride Posted:

Re: Am I a dead beat bridesmaid?

No, you're not. I'm sure your friend will understand as long as you acknowledge w/ card and gift!

micmar Posted:

Re: Am I a dead beat bridesmaid?

No, I was in my friend's wedding last year & had a cruise booked the day of her shower. So she was very understanding. I think she would be also, it's a long trek for a 3 or 4 hour event.

hbradio Posted:

Re: Am I a dead beat bridesmaid?

Not at all girl!

What a coincidence though - 3 of my BM are in Rochester too! I told them at the beginning to not feel obligated to come to the shower and they all sent gifts though.

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