Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

Becca2010 Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:26 AM

Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

Backstory: FMIL is one of the most passive aggressive people I have ever met. She's NEVER at fault for anything that happens in her OWN office and she laughs everything off like a child. She also speaks in baby talk sometimes when she wants something which makes me want to rip off her head and vomit.

Anyway, whenever someone brings baked goods or sweets of some kind to the office, I tend to say, 'No, thank you.' (I like to stick to my 100-calorie packs if I need to snack) FMIL is always like, 'Ooo are you surrrreee??' I say yes. Then she'll make a remark about losing weight. Whatever.

The other day she said something about how much weight I lost, like 'ooooo wow, you look great,' but in Greek of course, so I pretty much ignored it. I've never been able to take compliments well anyway. Then she said something about needing to fit in my wedding dress. I said, 'No, my wedding dress fits and it looks good. I lost weight for me, not for the wedding dress.' She said, 'oOoo ok!' Ugh.

Today she put a box of chocolate cookies on my desk. WHATTTT THEEE HELLLL??!!??! I said, 'No, thank you, please put them on your son's desk.' She said, 'OoOooo oookkaaaayyyy.'

I am mad. I guess it's just her trying to be nice, but please leave me aloneeee!!! Stop giving me garbage food!

I know, I'm being a jerk. ugh. I have to just let these things roll off my back.

elisa112101 Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:29 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

think of this as a test of your will power... you go girl!!!

grkbarbie Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:30 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

yea... let it go lol greek ppl will ALWAYS shove food in your face. i went to greece for 5 freakin days and i gained almost 10 POUNDS!!!!!!!!!!! they dont understand the concept of NO THANK U.. she prob doesnt want u to feel like she doenst like u if she doesnt offer u all the goodies. its her way of letting u know that she considers u part of her family.

if she didnt like u she would hold the box of cookies in ur face.. ask if u want.. and then walk away with them with a snotty attitude. the fact that she LEAVES the box ON YOUR desk means she REALLY LIKES U! lol

GiannisWifey Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:30 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

that's a greek for you!! they don't take no as an answer the first 2904829 times...........

I would go up to her desk and put some 100cal packs for her......'why don't you want these??? they are good? try some??!?!?!?'

Becca2010 Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:30 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

Posted by elisa112101

think of this as a test of your will power... you go girl!!!

FMIL is like the WW hungry monster!

kris_gets_hitched Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:31 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

Neel's mom does that to me sometimes, offering me all sorts of Indian sweets even though she knows that I'm on WW and don't like the sweets enough to really want them.

Just continue to tell her that you don't want her food, especially when it's junk food. There's nothing wrong with politely declining something.

Or take it but don't eat it, and throw it out.

And then she'll wonder how you're still skinny come October.

Haaaaaa!

flibbertigibbet Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:33 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

you should make cookies and put laxatives in them. give them to HER.

Rosalind_75 Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:34 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

omg!!! fmil does this too but not to me to FH

shes always baking or buying him stuff.

he told her the other day

MOM!!!! NO FCUKIN CANDY FOR EASTER!!!
THE WEDDING IS ALMOST HERE AND I NEED TO BE GOOD!!!!

she was like. not even a little

maybe its just a mom/fmil thing

let it go. pleaseeeeeeeeeeeee

YOU GO GIRL FOR WILL POWER!!!!

jennybee Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:38 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

I love my FIL's but can't imagine working with them! You're a good woman!!! Stay strong and let it roll...

Totally unrelated: I just set the hungry monster as my wallpaper...Thanks for the inspiration!!!

Becca2010 Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:41 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

Posted by jennybee

I love my FIL's but can't imagine working with them! You're a good woman!!! Stay strong and let it roll...

Totally unrelated: I just set the hungry monster as my wallpaper...Thanks for the inspiration!!!

I think the hungry monster is so cute! I want one!

jennybee Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:47 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

Posted by Becca2010

Posted by jennybee

I love my FIL's but can't imagine working with them! You're a good woman!!! Stay strong and let it roll...

Totally unrelated: I just set the hungry monster as my wallpaper...Thanks for the inspiration!!!

I think the hungry monster is so cute! I want one!

I know!!! Everytime I see him on tv, I get excited! Aren't you supposed to have the opposite reaction???

soontobecruz Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:51 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

you're not being a jerk it would bother me too. If you felt she was genually just trying to offer you a sweet that would be one thing. From the sound of it though she is trying to fatten you up or test your will power..

unfortunatley I don't think there is much you can do. Keep up the good will power and next time she puts sweets on your desk silently pick them up and put them back on hers, and return to your seat.

Becca2010 Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:56 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

That's the whole thing I don't get with Greek mothers... They force feed you fattening foods and then complain that you're fat or getting fat! WTHHHH! She must think I'm such a bisshhh for always declining. Whatever.

Funny sidenote: FMIL just offered me yogurt that a client brought in and i politely declined (i love yogurt, i just wasn't in the mood for any) and then FH walked in with a half a flatbread sandwich from DD and hash browns. I ate it all. FMIL reallllly must think i don't like her!

regy_k Posted: Mar 26, 2010 10:56 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

u are being a bit of a jerk, but getting asked and offered bad food constantly is VERY annoying!

my FMIL each time she sees she says how much weight I lost 'OMG Regina u lost MORE weight???? STOP THAT!'
1st of all I didnt lose more weight since the last week u saw me and stop talking about that, makes me feel as an anorexic- bulemic ana-girl

FMIL's what can ya do?

shelbylove918 Posted: Mar 26, 2010 11:06 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

Posted by Becca2010

That's the whole thing I don't get with Greek mothers... They force feed you fattening foods and then complain that you're fat or getting fat! WTHHHH! She must think I'm such a bisshhh for always declining. Whatever.

Funny sidenote: FMIL just offered me yogurt that a client brought in and i politely declined (i love yogurt, i just wasn't in the mood for any) and then FH walked in with a half a flatbread sandwich from DD and hash browns. I ate it all. FMIL reallllly must think i don't like her!

this must be an italian thing too.. cause my family shoves food in my face then tells me I need to lose weight,, HELLO!!! MIXED SIGNALS MUCH, LOL

JenBill61210 Posted: Mar 26, 2010 11:07 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

JayBee216 Posted: Mar 26, 2010 11:19 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

LOL not a jerk!

it's so annoying - the assistants here shove the naughty food in my face too, and I'm always like 'not eating it!'

Meanwhile, then she corners me and tells me how she lost all this weight on Jenny Criag.

***?

PS - I love the WW Hungry Monster!!!

Jna2010 Posted: Mar 26, 2010 11:26 AM

Re: Am I being a Jerk? (longer than I thought it would be, sorry kids)

yeah greek women definitely stuff food in your face regardless of what you say... my mom always ask if im hungdy i say no, she bring a huge plate of cheese crackers fruit etc lol they just dont care they want to feed you haha