I just got off the phone with my mother about pictures at the wedding. She told me that she would like the photographer to take family pictures during the reception. I told her that the photographer we picked is great for photojournalist pictures and I did not want to spend time during the reception for family pictures. They can be taken after the church and during the cocktail hour. We have 2 1/2 hours between the church and the cocktail hour!!!
She did not like this. PLUS she tells me that my aunt wants the photographer to take a family picture of her immediate family (aka sans myself or FH) during the reception.
Not for nothing, we paid a lot of $ for the photographer to take CANDID pictures throughout the reception with all the posed pictures of family outside the church after the ceremony. I do not want my photographer taking posed family pictures for an hour during the reception.
Am I being selfish?? Is this normally done???
brideinapril
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Re: Am I being selfish?
It's YOUR day, you are by no means being selfish - I think its a good idea, to get the posed pictures out of the way. This is what I did and I have NO REGRETS!!!!
ps. You can't please everybody!!!!
CubanBride
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Re: Am I being selfish?
I do not think you are being selfish. You paid for it so you get what you want. Simple as that. What does it matter if they take the pictures during the reception or any other time.
Wintersbride
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Re: Am I being selfish?
I agree with you. This is your wedding day and you are shelling out a lot of money. You are not being selfish, I think they are being rude.
gtsgirl
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Re: Am I being selfish?
I don't think your being selfish at all. There is plenty of time between your ceremony and the reception to take ALL the posed pictures necessary...if your Aunt wants a family picture maybe she can ask the photographer or someone else to take the picture there.
TracyInQueens
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Re: Am I being selfish?
I think it would be chaotic to try and get all your family members together during the reception. That's what those 2.5 hours should be for- so you all can enjoy the reception.
I'd ask your photographer if this is ever done (I've never been to a wedding where it was done this way) and I bet he will say no. Then you can take that info make to your mom and maybe she will be swayed.
I also think it's sort of rude for your aunt to want to use your photographer for a pic like that.
JimmysBride
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Re: Am I being selfish?
IMO, that is a ridiculous request of your aunt and your Mom. It's your day, your money that's paying your photographer -- you should have him take pictures of what YOU want him to take pictures of!! You are not being selfish at all.
jen110704
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Re: Am I being selfish?
You are not being selfish at all. I'd be pissed too if my mom asked this of me. That's what the time after church is for.
james'pokey
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Re: Am I being selfish?
I don;t think you are being selfish. It is your day adn you half the right to decide which pictures you would like taken and when.
Boop2704
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Re: Am I being selfish?
OMG, my aunt tried to do the same thing. She told my mother that she was going to ask our photographer to take a family photo of her, my uncle and my cousin, because they would all be dressed up. My mom told her don't even ask me, because there was no way I would let that happen. I paid a heck of a lot of money for pictures for me, not who ever wants one. I actually told my photographer at my last meeting not to take requests from anyone to take family photos unless I was the one asking for it. I couldn't believe my aunt had the nerve to even suggest it considering all the stress she put me through. DH and I were originally going to get married on Feb 14th, her birthday and she cried and complained that we couldn't have it that day because it was her birthday. She made me sick. But we eventually changed it for my mother, so she wouldn't have to hear her and because my aunt and uncle that own a florist said our flowers would be a lot more expensive on Valentines day. My suggestion, don't give in, do things the way you want and if you don't want your aunt to have a family pic taken, just tell your photographer ahead of time that he is not to take special requests for pictures!!
dita531
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Re: Am I being selfish?
If you are paying for it then you are not being selfish. My parents are paying for it so they get to do what they want.
hbradio
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Re: Am I being selfish?
Whoever pays the bill for the photographer gets to make this decision. At least, in my opinion. So if you are paying for it, then no, you are not being selfish at all!!!!
bride04
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Re: Am I being selfish?
The aunt thing would make me annoyed. You're not paying the photographer to take pictures for somebody else!
Here's my thought on the family shots...I felt the same way as you did. I didn't want the posed family shots and my photographer takes amazing candids. That's all I wanted. But, now after the wedding that is my one regret. I wish I would have had a nice group shot of each of side of our families. During the reception, my own family started getting together a group to take their own pictures, so my photographer jumped in and took some pictures. But, not everybody was there and there were things that got in the pictures that ruined them because they were not planned. Either way, it's your call. I don't think you are being selfish at all. It's YOUR wedding. Do what YOU want to do
jillnbrad
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Re: Am I being selfish?
Posted by gtsgirl
I don't think your being selfish at all. There is plenty of time between your ceremony and the reception to take ALL the posed pictures necessary...if your Aunt wants a family picture maybe she can ask the photographer or someone else to take the picture there.
I agree!! There's more than enough time for family pics b/t your ceremoy and reception.
Marisa&Brian
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Re: Am I being selfish?
You are not being selfish AT ALL !!! I had the same sort of talk w/ my mom b/c we also got a photojournalist - We also got a more traditional photographer who will take pics BEFORE the reception begins (Actually, even before the cocktail hour!) As a guest, I hate being pulled from the party to pose for pics !! I always DO it, but I don't like it !!
jen22
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Re: Am I being selfish?
Thanks soooo much!
Sometimes my mother has the uncanny ability to make me feel like I am the crazy one!
I would love to take posed pictures and we will right after the church and during the cocktail hour. I am putting my foot down on this one and telling my photographer not to give in!
