Am I Overreacting

LadyDuda81509 Posted: Jun 04, 2009 01:32 PM

Am I Overreacting

So I started working at the place Im at about 3 years ago. Pretty much from day 1 me and this guy got along so well! He's a little older than I am, and married. Well for the last 3 years we pretty much talk about everything, vent to each other about everything possible! He is like to me, one of the girls, but not a girl, and not gay!

Well I heard from one of my BM who also works with us, that he told her that he doesnt think he will be able to come to my wedding! Why you ask... money issues!

Im sorry but I dont care about the money! for one of my good friends not to be there for me and come to my wedding really offends me! I mean I've been talking about getting engaged and my wedding since i met the guy, and for him to not be there for me makes me not wanna speak to him! Am i being selfish??! probably a little yeah, but i told my BM to tell him i dont want a gift, i just want him to be there! The invites went out yesterday, so i guess we will just have to wait and see...

MrsCM Posted: Jun 04, 2009 01:35 PM

Re: Am I Overreacting

I feel that way too! I had some people tell me they couldn't afford to come and I asked them not to get me a gift but it was more about airfare unfortunately.

mokie74m Posted: Jun 04, 2009 02:05 PM

Re: Am I Overreacting

I dont' think your being selfish. Your just upset that one of your close friends may not attend one of the most special days of your life. I wouldn't be mad at him though, put yourself in his shoes. You guys are really close and he probably wants to give you a generous envelope being that you are close, however financially he may not be able to, so he's probably embarrassed to come and not give anything or less then he would like. Hopefully he RSVP's yes. Good luck.

mrsdraskin2009 Posted: Jun 04, 2009 02:10 PM

Re: Am I Overreacting

I wouldn't take it as a personal affront.

He was being honest that he probably didn't want to offend you if he couldn't give you a decent amoutn of $$ as a gift. In a way, it is thoughtful, but he probably did not mean for you take it wrongly.

But also, he's a dude, and dude's sometimes just don't get that it could come off that way to you. If you are that close, I highly doubt this is soemthing to not speak to him over. I would speak to him privately and mention that his presence is most important to you, not the $$$.

gina409 Posted: Jun 04, 2009 02:16 PM

Re: Am I Overreacting

i dont think u r being selfish..i think u should just wait for the invite to come back..if it says no then talk 2 him..tell him u want him there u dont care bout a gift

PROBM Posted: Jun 04, 2009 03:09 PM

Re: Am I Overreacting

i just think he is great close work friend but he is not close friends with your fam and friends and if he is looking for ways to cut costs during such a terrible economy this is easy way to do so. think about it if one of you lost your jobs you would not stay really really cose like now and on your wedding day you are so busy with all your fam and friends you are not going to hang out with him for more than 10 min or so