And the BM problems begin.....

neesiepie Posted: Jul 20, 2004 04:51 PM

And the BM problems begin.....

Well, just got my first negative response from one of my bridesmaids in Florida in regard the the dresses i chose....

'It is very pretty although it will not be flattering at all because it is so pin straight unless your a size five.'....and 'Sorry to be opinionated about the dress. I know it's your day, but I will be the one wearing it and I felt I should at least speak up. Thanks.'

I never complained when I was in ANYONE'S wedding. AAAAGH!
It's not like the dresses are clingy. They are satin...and if she gets fitted right, she'll look fine. Maybe I sound insensitive, but if she is unhappy with her body, it doesn't matter what kind of dress I pick...she will NEVER be comfortable! Plus, the dress comes with straps and a wrap and all my bridesmaids were ok with it! Oh well....can't please everyone.....

jill13bean Posted: Jul 20, 2004 04:54 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

IT is your wedding so she should not speak up ..BUT this is why i let my BM pick it out. Also because they are spending the money. I would say 6 out of 7 LOVED The dress. I loved it so it was the one.
She was not from NY so we didnt have that much time.
Yours is from Florida. It is tougher when they are not there with you.
Tell her if she doesnt want to wear it she doesnt have to....she just wont be standing next to you when you get married

RedHead Posted: Jul 20, 2004 04:55 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

LOLOL...been there done that...

hopefully this is your only issue!

dita531 Posted: Jul 20, 2004 04:56 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

do you have a picture of the dress? is it too late to change it?

FLaCaTaCa Posted: Jul 20, 2004 04:56 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

Unfortunately Neesie, You can't please everybody and you should tell her that while you appreciate that she felt comfortable enough to speak up...she was the only one. Assure her how you just did us with the fitting and the material and all.

But don't mention the body part to her, she may think you're being nasty.

divabride Posted: Jul 20, 2004 04:58 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

Wait, this is coming from a girl that hasnt even tried on the dress yet. Let her know nicely that your ultimate decision was based on all your bridemaids opinion and that it comes with a wrap. You said it yourself, she will not like any dress that you pick, so stick to what you like if there's no pleasing her.

BTW - Love your new pic!!

Nora101004 Posted: Jul 20, 2004 04:58 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

Did she try it on at least before she commented?

Butterflybride Posted: Jul 20, 2004 05:00 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

She'll just have to deal with it, lol

tourist Posted: Jul 20, 2004 05:05 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

ok. . . deep breath. It could have been worse. i think she was just being honest. Is she big? Did any of the girls try them on?

I had trouble with this part too, b/c I couldn't go with my MOH, so I showed her pics & she didn't like them, but then when she started trying things on, she liked ones that were different that she originally wanted.

And, one that I LOVED, looked bad on ( I tried it myself) and she agreed when she tried it.

So, maybe it's not as bad as she thinks, but it's hard to tell unless you've seen it on, and usually the samples are only in small sizes.

BlondieBell Posted: Jul 20, 2004 05:10 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

I say, let her deal with it. You're right - if she isn't happy with her body, so will not be happy with any of your choices. It's your day!!

neesiepie Posted: Jul 20, 2004 05:18 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

Nope. She hasn't tried on the dress yet.
I wrote her back saying she will look beautiful, she is being too hard on herself, that 2 of my other bridemaids up here are heavier than her and they were ok with the dress, it has straps and a wrap that she can wear after the ceremony and that the material is not clingy at all.....I told her I can't please everyone.
She wrote me back and said thanks, she feels better now....

Butterflybride Posted: Jul 20, 2004 05:20 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

Posted by neesiepie

Nope. She hasn't tried on the dress yet.
I wrote her back saying she will look beautiful, she is being too hard on herself, that 2 of my other bridemaids up here are heavier than her and they were ok with the dress, it has straps and a wrap that she can wear after the ceremony and that the material is not clingy at all.....I told her I can't please everyone.
She wrote me back and said thanks, she feels better now....

Yay! Good!

Bebalina Posted: Jul 20, 2004 05:20 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

Tell her to zip it if she hasnt tried it on

How Rude!

JenniferLee111204 Posted: Jul 20, 2004 05:26 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

i have 5 bridesmaids. one of them gave me a problem

you know what! ITS TOUGH CR@P!!!

hehehe

btw.. i should say that i told all the girls that they could pick out ANY dress that they wanted AS LONG as it is by BIll Levkoff and in black satin- and she STILL complained

-Jennifer

neesiepie Posted: Jul 20, 2004 05:32 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

My initial reaction was TOUGH NOOGIES! This is MY wedding and we do what NEESIE wants! But then i told myself...if there ever was a time to be diplomatic, it's NOW!
Talking to myself actually worked! lolol

tourist Posted: Jul 20, 2004 05:42 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

Posted by neesiepie

My initial reaction was TOUGH NOOGIES! This is MY wedding and we do what NEESIE wants! But then i told myself...if there ever was a time to be diplomatic, it's NOW!
Talking to myself actually worked! lolol

good job!
my friend picked a dress with the other girls & not me. but I knw they 3/4 of them were about my size, so I didn't stress about it, but if a bunch of skinny chics loved a dress I hadn't seen in person, I might be a little nervous too!

neesiepie Posted: Jul 20, 2004 06:03 PM

Re: And the BM problems begin.....

AAAAAAAAAGH!
Just when I thought I had it under control...SAME BRIDESMAID emails me AGAIN. Says she found a salon that can order the dress for $125 (as opposed to $155 from here) b/c they are not in NY.....I am going to kill her!
I told her NO because the dye lot will be different and I would rather have peace of mind and not worry about the colors matching each other. I told her for $30, it's not worth me worrying....and that I would pay the difference.
Looking forward to her response.....