Another post about kids at the wedding

JanuaryBride06 Posted: Jul 11, 2005 09:41 AM

Another post about kids at the wedding

Two family members on FHs side have assumed that their children (under 3) will be invited to the wedding. They said that their babysitter could come watch them during the wedding. FH and I said that we needed to discuss it because it was an AWKWARD moment.

On both sides, all of the kids are under three. We don't want them there. If they can have a sitter at my wedding they can have one AT THEIR HOME. I will not make an exception for one side - am I wrong? What's the best way to confront them on this?

AJsMommy122 Posted: Jul 11, 2005 09:55 AM

Re: Another post about kids at the wedding

No your not wrong. Explain to them that there are just TOO many children in your families and you don't want the wedding to get out of hand with kids running everywhere.
Say you would love to have *their children* but then you would also have to let the others come....
I would bring up.. well since you were willing to bring a sitter to the wedding will it be a problem to have the sitter stay at home with them??? We hope you don't mind..
and then see what they say

N.Y.bride Posted: Jul 11, 2005 09:58 AM

Re: Another post about kids at the wedding

I would say stick to what you want. I would try to have it spread by word of mouth first. Then talk to them and if they mention their kids coming/babysitter, say no.

I cant imagine having to possibly pay for kids (depending on your hall) and their babysitter when neither of them where supposed to be there in the first place.

N.Y.bride Posted: Jul 11, 2005 09:59 AM

Re: Another post about kids at the wedding

Oh yeah and I assume your hall is on the water. Tell them you think its dangerous (which I think it is), and its an adult party only.

suven Posted: Jul 11, 2005 10:02 AM

Re: Another post about kids at the wedding

What I used was, 'oh, we really can't because once *my* side sees that your children are there, they will get very upset with us, even though you'd have a sitter there, they'd still get mad at us. Sorry!'

one woman went so far as to say, 'well, I'm sure my sitter could watch their children, too'

Luckily, I was quick on my toes for that and responded with, 'oh, LOL... thanks so much for the offer, but my family is crazy and I know they'd never go for that'

LFitzy79 Posted: Jul 11, 2005 10:02 AM

Re: Another post about kids at the wedding

Posted by N.Y.bride

Oh yeah and I assume your hall is on the water. Tell them you think its dangerous (which I think it is), and its an adult party only.

That's the perfect way to go about it, I would make a few phone calls or tell them in person at family events, that none of the children will be invited because they are all too young to be there at night on the water with adults drinking. And that you hope they understand. Say it matter of factly...'FH and I discussed it, and we decided not to invite any of the little kids because....' and then stick to your guns, you're right, you can't invite the kids on one side but not the other, that will lead to bad feelings.

JanuaryBride06 Posted: Jul 11, 2005 10:55 AM

Re: Another post about kids at the wedding

thank you, ladies

MissingTheBGene Posted: Jul 11, 2005 11:04 AM

Re: Another post about kids at the wedding

Seriously, it baffles me why people want to bring all the children to and event such as a wedding. Almost all of my family is looking forward to just one evening to which they can enjoy themselves.

I agree with what everyone stated above!

Kim51103 Posted: Jul 11, 2005 11:33 AM

Re: Another post about kids at the wedding

Def not wrong....Children under 3 can be a lot to deal with at a wedding....especially bc the parents have to watch them...and they cant enjoy themselves...

They will have to get a sitter...theres no other choice...You'll have to just tell them nicely!

JodiBabe Posted: Jul 11, 2005 02:14 PM

Re: Another post about kids at the wedding

Stick to your original plan......NO KIDS!!!!!

I had a family member try to get me to change my mind & invite another relatives kids who would have been 8 & 10 & can be wild. The only 2 kids (under 13) I had at my wedding were my 2 flower girls and I wouldn't have had it any other way!!!!!!

candb Posted: Jul 11, 2005 02:19 PM

Re: Another post about kids at the wedding

You are not wrong! I hate it when every one assumes that their children are invited. I say that if you don't want them at the wedding they shouldn't go. Be sure that you are not wishy washy with the parents when you tell them.

eliz808 Posted: Jul 11, 2005 05:46 PM

Re: Another post about kids at the wedding

Having kids at your wedding when you don't want it really stinks, especially during the ceremony. We had a 3 year old there and paid $165 for him, what a waste! Also you don't want to insult some people by not inviting their kids. How are you adressing the invitations. Is is Mr & mrs so & So, then they should know better and not bring their kids.