FH and I recently found out that b/c of school opportunities we are going to be separated for the first 5 months after our wedding we are both finishing med school and i got a coop position in NY and FH is going to be finishing up his semester in PR. when we set the date for the wedding we had no way of knowing this would happen. FH and I have been living together already for almost 2 years but still it's going to **** to be apart the first few months of marriage!!
just wanted to know if anyone else is in a similar situation? i know some military couples have this happen but i just feel sooo bad
thanks for letting me vent girls
allornil
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awww. I'm sorry BUT..PR? cmon now...you guys can have some romantic time in sunny PR!!!
ok, but seriously, this will cement your careers later. You'll be ok. and PR isn't so far from NY. You can fly down. or up. right?
sandybeaches115
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Posted by allornil
awww. I'm sorry BUT..PR? cmon now...you guys can have some romantic time in sunny PR!!!
ok, but seriously, this will cement your careers later. You'll be ok. and PR isn't so far from NY. You can fly down. or up. right?
true it's not too far...3.5-4 hrs nonstop flight! actually FH is from PR so he'll have his fam around but i just feel really silly getting married and then being separated...oh well...if i would have known, i would have pushed back the date 6 months! urggghhh i feel so dumb
xoabxo
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I'm sorry :o(
hamptonsbride2010
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It is a bad situation - but you can make the best of it... you two will be married but in different places but in the end it will be worth it - married and will both get great jobs.
Try and set aside certain times / days to have special time - be it on the phone, email, chat, video chat....
Time will fly by and you will be happy you are married, even if you aren't in the same bed at night!
angelscri
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I am in the same situation also. FH and I are gonna be apart the first 5 months of marriage also. We are just gonna try and make the best of it and hope the time passes by fast.
sandybeaches115
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Posted by angelscri
I am in the same situation also. FH and I are gonna be apart the first 5 months of marriage also. We are just gonna try and make the best of it and hope the time passes by fast.
soo comforting to know we're not alone...
JLWSJC
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MY best law school friend and his fiance were seperated all through 3 years of law school... and they got married between 2nd and third year so they were separated (NY and DC) for the first 9 months or so of their marriage after the first month. But they made it work. I know the distance isn't the same, but they visited on weekends and holidays and they're so super happy now to be together, they appreciate the time together a lot, yhou know?
I'tll ****, but you'll make it work and it'll go by quick. You'll be so busy with school. Good luck :)
lbkate
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:( that stinks...However think of it this way;
You will both be soooooo busy during this time while finishing up Med school, that you probably wouldn't be together all that much anyway. I know it isn't the same, but just think about how much more time you will be able to devote to your practices without the 'distraction' (and I say that sooo loosely) of trying to be newlyweds...
You guys will make it work, and just think about how amazing it will be when you are both all finished!!
Hang in there!
HamptonsBride
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Old bride here...Dh & I were separated for 3 months a week after our wedding (lived together for about 5 years at that point)...and while it stunk...we'd e-mail love notes and call all the time...and when we got to spend a weekend together it was great...the time will go quickly and absence does make the heart grow fonder...HTH!!
angelscri
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I know we will be ok. You and I are in almost the exact situation. FH will be in Barbados and I will be in NY for the first 5 months.
Taunita
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Hey,
So sorry to hear that See if you can plan a couple of weekend visits over any potential holidays i.e. calendar days off- Perhaps you can map separate little countdowns to look forward to. Obviously the phone goes without say - communication is of the utmost importance - but try thinking of creative ways to shorten the miles - pick a movie to watch or book to read and discuss, stargaze and/or set alarms on your watches so that you think about eachother at a certain point of the day. Start planning your future and focus on your lives to be - you planned a wedding - so it would be perfect to plan a reunion of sorts - second honeymoon / intimate celebration between the two of you I was in a long distance relationship of sorts with my FH for three years (out of six) and these are little things that helped me keep my cool so to speak. Congratulations on med school though!!
sandybeaches115
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you girls totally rock!! thanks for all the kind words and suggestions! I really love the support network on LIW. I was just soo bummed today but I know things will look up! good luck to the other girls in the same situation...we have each other to vent to.
FutureMrsG
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I have friends who have been married since 2006 and have never lived together with the exception of summers. She lives in NY and he lives in Boston. She is finishing her PhD and he is a professor- They had hoped it would be short term but he cannot find a good job in NY. They see each other most weekends but they only live together 'full time' during his school breaks.Don't stress over a few months apart. You will be really busy finishing school so the time will go pretty fast.
MrsInglima
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This almost happened to DH and I, except we were going to spend a few years apart. It ended up working out, but in the long run just remember that it's only a few months and when it's over you'll never be apart again. So it'll be ok!
sandybeaches115
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thanks girls! I just really don't like it when lately people have been 'why are you getting married right now if you aren't going to even be together after your married? why don't you just wait, or push it back' I just answer that when we planned the wedding we didnt know this was going to happen. also too much has been planned and too much $ has been spent to change the date...
