What's the point of this and who really needs to go? If you agreed to get married, isn't that enough? Doesn't pre-marriage counseling encourage you to think twice about marrying?
esb980
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Re: Anyone going for Pre-marriage counseling?
I had to go (church said so). Uhm, I think it was kinda stupid. She triyed to gives us 'tools' to work on our realtionship.... they were kinda stupid.... I felt it was a waste of $$$... but I mean w/ a different counceler, it might be better!!
ali120206
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Re: Anyone going for Pre-marriage counseling?
I wouldn't say it encourages you to think twice about marriage. I think it helps you think about differences you may have and may not realize and how you can work together on those differences.
We went to pre-cana and it forced us to look at a lot of issues. We were in agreement on most of them and had discussed them previously but, I found it useful.
hocus
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Re: Anyone going for Pre-marriage counseling?
I don't premarital counseling is designed to make you think twice about getting married.
I think the intention is to help you focus on the kinds of issues that might arise once you married that you didn't have to focus on where you were dating.
I also think that this is probably more relevant if you don't live with your FH or if you haven't already merged finances.
There is thread on the newlywed board about some of the painful issues some new brides go through.
sarahradio5
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Re: Anyone going for Pre-marriage counseling?
if you mean pre-Cana, we are currently going doing that. I LOVE it! I think my FH and I are getting a lot out of openly communicating with married couples and couples who are about to get married like us. To me, it made me realize that we all have the same issues... I was SHOCKED that the other couples all fought about holidays, too - which is a big bone of contention with me and my FH. When my FH and leave, we almost feel renewed when we leave... and FH gets all mushy and appreciative of me. It's really wonderful! And having the spiritual element brought into our wedding planning amidst all the talk of DJ's and chocolate fountains brings the whole reason for getting married to the forefront. I wish it was longer than 5 weeks! I think my FH and I (although he won't admit it as much as me) will really learn a lot and take a lot from pre-Cana. (wow... I'm a dork. lol)
October Bliss
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Re: Anyone going for Pre-marriage counseling?
IMHO, just because you agreed to get married it is NOT nearly enough. If it was the divorce rate wouldn't be so high.
FH & I are both 'older' and therefore kind of set in our ways. We were both single for a very long time before we got together. Adjusting to taking another person's feelings, needs, wants and plans into account 24/7 is a HUGE adjustment, and how you deal with it can often spell disaster OR the ultimate success.
FH and I have discussed counseling - we just can't find a program outside the church.
camposal
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Re: Anyone going for Pre-marriage counseling?
I am looking foward to it. I dont want to become one of the divorce statistics. If only we put half the energy into marriage planning as we do into planning the wedding, i think there would be less divorces.
