Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

WinterBride2005 Posted: Jan 23, 2004 11:21 AM

Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

FH and would like to buy a house or even a condo before we get married. But, we are wondering what if we don't find something that we like or can afford. My parents are being very generous by giving us the down payment but still with how the market is, I feel like we should wait and see how things go. I really believe the prices are going to drop a little. I hope before we get married. We really don't want to pay rent. I feel like it is a total waste. Anyone else going through this?

btrflygrl Posted: Jan 23, 2004 11:31 AM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

we are doing it...actually, I moved in before the wedding in Dec to save money....$100 to his parents or $650 for rent....
but we are also awaiting a lawsuit settlement which we hope will give us the money for a house

cocoa Posted: Jan 23, 2004 11:34 AM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

All i can say is that i HATE that starter houses are almost $350,000, that they are building enormous monstrosities of a house all over the island that are mainly giant foyers, and that people 55 and over are getting these massive retirement homes on land that used to be used for educating the children of long island (i'm a teacher) and that there aren't any friggin apartment complexes around and paying rent IS a waste because you can't find a place for less than $1000. I went to rent.com and found that for a 2bedroom apt, in maryland, you can pay 900, so a 1 bedroom place is like 650/month. Sorry to vent, but i totally understand where you are coming from. things have to change on LI b/c it is getting out of hand. there isn't a middle class anymore and that sucks!
sooooooo, back to your question. do you have privacy there? if all in the situation are comfortable, stay. none of us are going to make it on LI if our families don't help us out a bit. The cost of living here is not proportional to what it was when they bought homes. it's sad. Good Luck!

Jan05Bride Posted: Jan 23, 2004 11:49 AM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

I will be living in an apartment over my MIL when I marry. Yes, her bed will be right under mine ... It's two comletely separate apartments though.
She's a very generous lady and we couldn't pass up the opportunity to save a lot of money!

julz33 Posted: Jan 23, 2004 11:53 AM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

We are undecided on what we are going to do. I think we will have enought money for a down payment but I want to take my time to find the right place for me and that timimg might not be right near the wedding. I am still unsure about a house, condo, apartment... prices are so ridiculous. We are even considering moving out of state. My FH can transfer in his job and make the same salary as he does in NY in places where the cost of living is much lower. I will probably take a huge paycut though but at least we wont be suffering every week, working just to have enought for the mortgage and house bills like we would in NY.

no stress bride Posted: Jan 23, 2004 11:56 AM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

Right now my fiance and I pay rent and obviously live together but we are kicking it around about possibly moving back in with my parents to save cause there is no way to save now with rent!! I hate those senior complex they are all over the island what about young professionals just starting out?? were are those located not here i guess!

WinterBride2005 Posted: Jan 23, 2004 12:01 PM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

Privacy will not be anything like if we were living ALONE. But, we are willing to just deal with it if it means not renting a 2bdrm apt for 1200!! For a few hundred more, we can just go into the city and get a studio or one bdrm.. but who want s to do that. I live in Queens and FH lives in Brroklyn. I def. do not want to live in Brooklyn so we are looking for something in my area. I get so mad because the prices of homes are so unreasonable.

nan&dave Posted: Jan 23, 2004 12:02 PM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

We are going to live with my parents. It will allow us to save for our future house. Who knows if we'll be able to afford one the way prices are now. I also hope prices go down.

BillysBride Posted: Jan 23, 2004 01:26 PM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

Yup! I live in my basement apt and FI will be moving in before the wedding in order to save more $$ to buy a house, but we have to share a kitchen with my mom. But it's not so bad.

tourist Posted: Jan 23, 2004 01:37 PM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

Posted by cocoa

I went to rent.com and found that for a 2bedroom apt, in maryland, you can pay 900, so a 1 bedroom place is like 650/month.

Yeah, my FH keeps telling me we can afford a house in Maine for less than a co-op in Westchester. I wouldn' t live here if my family wasn't here. Not living with parents though, will continue to rent my apartment, untill we find a condo we can affod, although we want a house.

OctGroom Posted: Jan 23, 2004 05:12 PM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

totally agree with you tourist.. the prices up here are so bad. We want a house someday. We thought about North Carolina, but we decided to stay up here for now. Just couldn't leave the families.

The thing is in NC you can buy a huge house for a regular coop here. Scary, right?

My FMIL offered to let us stay in the basement apartment in her house and that's very col. like her alot.. but we want our own place.

MrHostility Posted: Jan 23, 2004 05:41 PM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

Prices here are just insane. About 10 years ago, my sister bought a larger house(not huge) in Farmingdale for like $140k I think. Now, the house would go at least triple that. It's disgusting how expensive it is to live on LI.

I would like to move to Florida, or somewhere cheaper and warmer by the ocean.(You can get a brand new custom house in FL for like $150k, in-ground pool, the whole 9 yards) Except I'm close to my family, and it would kill me to move. But I'm not going to live in a slum here, just to remain close. FW doesn't want to move either, but I don't see any other way at the moment.

sp04 Posted: Jan 23, 2004 05:52 PM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

Well FH and I are currently staying with my parents. We were thinking we would have an apartment set up by March 1 our wedding is the end of Feb, but we are probably going to rent for a while because we do want to get our own apt and we do want to buy something but not right away.. we don't want to rush into buying anything if we are not sure exactly of what we want yet..(house or apt, and location?) But if we had to stay with my parents of course we would and they want us to stay...

btrflygrl Posted: Jan 23, 2004 09:24 PM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

we are leaving NY....we realized it and many of our friends too (all 20 somethings) that you cannot make a living in NY if you are not upper middle class-wealthy. We don't want to struggle.....we want to provide for ourselves and our kids without worrying about it

MrHostility Posted: Jan 24, 2004 10:44 AM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

Posted by btrflygrl

we are leaving NY....we realized it and many of our friends too (all 20 somethings) that you cannot make a living in NY if you are not upper middle class-wealthy. We don't want to struggle.....we want to provide for ourselves and our kids without worrying about it

You say you're leaving NY, are you going to stay close by, or just move far way? Just curious.

btrflygrl Posted: Jan 24, 2004 04:08 PM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

We plan on Georgia....his sister is down there, we have friends in NC, FL, and another couple is considering VA Beach

gaby25 Posted: Jan 24, 2004 04:24 PM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

I thought I was only one thinking about this.
we really don't know what to do. Honestly, with me in school next year we really don't have money for any kind of down payment, please we barely have enough for this wedding!!! but FH is a Veteran (only 26!) and he is trying to find out about some benefits he might be getting, like getting lower interest rates, or no down payment kind of thing that the VA will offer him. (not too sure how this works though or if its too good to be true) but it won't hurt to find out. It would have to be a condo or apartment because we can't afford a mortgage that will probable be over 2000. My sister actually had a house built in Virginia for about 280,000 and I mean this was one heck of a house. but unfortunately the job situation was not that good and they wound up selling it so now they are looking into Texas but she says she will not stay in NY because it is horrible how expensive it is and how she feels the quality of life is deteriorating (sp?)

gaby25 Posted: Jan 24, 2004 04:26 PM

Re: Anyone living w/ parents after marriage for short term?

Forgot to add that I don't think we will be able to stay with our parents because my dad has a two-bedroom co-op but my younger brother and my dad is getting married this summer so there will be no room for us and there is no room in FHs parents house because he has a big enough family already. Hopefully my mom will buy a house this year and she said she would rent us the basement (very cheap)