Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
nrvbrd
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Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
I am getting flack from my family because during the whole year and change that I have been engaged I pretty much did everything on my own.
My FH did come with me to most of the vendors, but he has to he is paying for half of this wedding. Why would I have my Mom or my aunts come with me to vendors they have different tastes than I do and they would probably annoy me.
They did however come with me to look and pick out my dress. Other than that I ordered the invites, favors, and all other accessories on my own. Once things were purchased I did show everyone.
I did tell everyone that next month we could all get together and assemble the favors, programs, menus and such. Before that time I really did not need any help.
Was I mean in saying this?
daisybride
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
Do they want to help? Nobody in my family wants to be bothered. They make me feel like I'm making a big deal out of nothing. I think if you invite them over to look at all you've done and help you with the finishing touches that would be great. They will probably feel needed then.
regina2
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
My dad and step-mother wanted to help, but I have very different taste then them. I wanted FI to help more, but he really has no interest. I'm hoping as it gets close he will begin to understand the amount of work that went into organizing a wedding.
As for my BP, they all live in different states and two out of three have young children. They did what they could.
So did everything out of default, no one else to do it.
Leap29
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
my FH & parents have been very helpful! fh's parents have been helpful also. my bridal party (except for my MOH) has not even asked me ONCE if i need any help with anything!!! it really bothers me...i have so much to do...like putting together programs, etc...they only ask me 'how is everything going?'....
in a way i like to do things myself & with my mom b/c we have the same tastes...but it would be nice if they offered....
nrvbrd
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
Can you guys tell me what exactly you are getting help with?
cw0904
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
I don't ask for help b/c I know I will get opinions. Only when I do need help like folding stuff, wrapping, coordinating do I start to delegate. All the stuffing of the eparty invites I did with the help of FH and my mom. I then quadruple checked to make sure everything was fine but other than that, I didn't ask for help. My mom knows I am a control freak so she just lets me be. FH's mom could care less which is good and my sister, well she is in her own world and that is okay too. I wish my BM's would help but I don't need the help just yet so I am not worrying right now.
Kysha they are asking you this now? You are less than 40 days no?
nrvbrd
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
Yes Wanda they are asking now. They just commented that I did everything myself.
As you just said, you really do not need a ton of help until it is time to do all of the little things.
Being at work I have the internet at my disposal so it is easier and quicker for me to just do things on my own.
People are never happy.
jenny2penny
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
I am ok with it, because I know I do better pricing and I am putting all the deposits down anyway. I hae discussed what I found and final decision, before actually signing. He has been agreeing and trusts me. BUT what drove me nuts the other day was, you wanted the video, you want to upgrade flowers. Now all of a sudden he has a problem? I think he was just pulling at what he could to defend himself in a fight we were having about money. His Sisters have asked to help, but so far have been able to do it all myself.
kelly6273
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
DH and I did everything ourselves and to be honest...I liked it better that way. Too many opinions are never good!!!
ChristineC68
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
DH & I did 90% of the wedding stuff just between the two of us (my dress excluded).
I know for me personally, I have always had issues with asking for help.
I also think some things don't really concern other people. Why would my sister care what photographer we use?
But when it came to the frilly stuff (invites, flowers, etc) my mother came with us to go over some things with the vendors, because that is what she expressed an interest in.
Several people offered to help with some of the other things they CAN help with - address invites, assemble programs & favors, etc. WHich on many occasions we accepted.
nrvbrd
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
Thanks Christine.
I am the same way.
alina
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
Keisha we did everything ourselves, with absolutely minor help from friends/family... We did the assembly and picking of invites and favors... But to a degree our parents didn't really want to be involved until 1 month before the wedding... But even then their involvement had to do with what kind of tie Lenny would wear and what kind of cuff links.
When parents did get involved, things were a bit rough b/c of clash of opinions, so personally, if your family is such that they may get offended if you disagree with them, then I recommend doing everything ourselves.
Valentinegirl
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
I am on my own also. Sometimes i hate it but when someone gives me their opinion its usually different than mine so I'd rather do it all alone :) Karissa
maysie18
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
I don't think you were mean - I'm in the same boat. Many things folks can't help out with, I need to do them myself. Plus like you said, sometimes too many opinions isn't a good thing, just makes the ultimate decision more confusing. Good that you offered to let them come & help you assemble stuff, that should make them feel better :)
eternityawaits
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Re: Are you doing pretty much everything yourself and ok with it?
I have done everything myself except for my dress. I even put together all my favors myself. I think it's better off that way, because I am a real perfectionist and I would have been Pissed if anyone messed anything up.
No one seems to take it too personally, although I have had offers for help.
