Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

deedee Posted: Dec 11, 2003 12:31 PM

Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

Last night I was at work..
( I work in a restaurant two nights a week).

We had 'Trista's Wedding' on. We are all talking about how elaborate it was. I was standing next to my boss (who is invited to my wedding) and the bartender (this really annoying girl).
She out of nowhere says: 'How much are you paying per plate at your wedding??'

Who says that !?!

I just told her none of your business, and then my boss told her that it is obnoxious to ask such a question. Has anyone asked you such a question ( not including family or very close friends)? Am I over reacting? feedback please.

JimmysBride Posted: Dec 11, 2003 12:41 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

She took the words right outta my mouth!!

OBNOXIOUS!!

No one but family has done this to me yet, but even when family does it -- it is STILL EXTREMELY RUDE!!!

Only another bride-to-be has the right to ask that question, IMO!

BMD'sPeanut Posted: Dec 11, 2003 12:45 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

Maybe she just didn't know better.
I'm not shady about things like that.
If you ask, I'll tell you. But I don't generally volunteer information.
I don't really see what the big deal is.
I know in my mind that I am not inviting people to my wedding to get gifts from them. So if I talk about the cost, I also know that it's not a 'hint-hint'
What other reason would there be to either decide to tell or keep it a secret?

julz33 Posted: Dec 11, 2003 12:51 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

People ask me that all the time.
I tell them, but I tell them the TOTAL cost of the wedding per person. For example if your wedding is $40K and you are having 100 people, say $400 a person. That usually shuts them up, and it isn't really a lie either!

wenndypoo Posted: Dec 11, 2003 12:58 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

I agree with Ciminok. She probably doesn't know any better. I'm not shady or sensitive about $ either, and if people ask, I have no problem telling. If they initiate the conversation then I don't see it as hint dropping.
You may be over reacting if you don't like this girl. Just chalk it up to ignorance.
No big deal, IMO.

Smolokoff Posted: Dec 11, 2003 12:59 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

Only one word comes to mind... RUDE!!!!

prncssrachel Posted: Dec 11, 2003 01:06 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

People ask me this ALL the time. I mean ALL the time. It gets annoying, but if it's another bride or a good friend, then I don't mind. Most people I know have not heard of the Bourne Mansion, and if they have, I guess they're just curious. But I still think it's RUDE RUDE RUDE!

jenny2penny Posted: Dec 11, 2003 01:10 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

VERY RUDE!!!!

KathleenG Posted: Dec 11, 2003 01:16 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

To me, it is a rude question. I'll never forget a few months ago when a good friend asked what I was spending. I finally told her and her response,'Oh my God!!! You are spending that, blah blah blah.... It is like if I am kind enough to tell you personal info, please don't have the balls to comment on the amount!!! Now that is what I call rude!!! It made me feel bad, FH and I are not wealthy people and we have gone overboard for some things, I already worry enough, don't rub it in!!!

NYCHICK Posted: Dec 11, 2003 02:11 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

O very very very RUDE

MizStinker Posted: Dec 11, 2003 02:13 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

i find it very rude i totally understand - people just flip it around on me and say why are you waiting two years ? If they took half a second to think about it - maybe its because we wont have enough time to save if we dont wait. Stupid people - and if you tell people how much the proposed cost is again they say that is ridiculous - and I feel like saying you had your wedding we deserve ours. What really gets me is that this guy I know keeps freaking out and talking behind my back because we are waiting two years - in the meantime he got married 20 years ago and invited people to a resturant where he had them PAY FOR THEMSELVES - yeah what am i waiting for?
Sorry had to vent

AliKing Posted: Dec 11, 2003 02:19 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

Good for you for telling her it was none of her business!!!!!!!!!!!! That is really rude of her to ask!

deedee Posted: Dec 11, 2003 02:29 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

I don't care if I was spending $400 a person or $40 a person. I have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. FH and I are paying for the entire affair and there is alot of thought and care put into every detail. I wouldn't want it any other way either.
I just wouldn't ask someone what they are paying per plate because who's business is it anyway?
I wouldn't even ask someone how many carats is their diamond either, and thats something she had asked me also. Apparently this girl is missing a few social graces.

halloweenbride04 Posted: Dec 11, 2003 03:28 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

That is rude! That's like saying 'so how much do you bring home each year?' I've never had anyone not close ask that, but I have had someone ask what the total bill on the wedding will be....

Maribelle7777 Posted: Dec 11, 2003 03:36 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

I am convinced that some people are not taught what is polite and what is rude.

My favorite answer for rude questions is 'and why do you want to know?' because normally they are only asking to be nosy.

Only once did someone say 'because I'm being nosy' - I said 'That's not a good enough reason'.

Jen_n_Dale Posted: Dec 11, 2003 03:45 PM

Re: Are You Girls Ready for RUDE!! spinoff..

The only time when someone asks is when they are planning or looking for a hall. I know sometimes maybe it is outof curiosity. Especially if it is an older person. My dad brings up 'our wedding was $3,000 with a live band.'