Are you walking down the aisle with...

My faith dictates thaat both parents walk Jewish brides and grooms down the aisle. Since Dad passed away in July, my brother is going to stand in for him.

Now since Mom may be temporarily wheelchair bound due to recent back surgery (and she'srather proud), she will more than likely be waiting at the end of the aisle because she will feel uncomfortable. I do not want to push the issue with her. Her emotional and physical comfort comes first. It looks like it may end up being me and my brother. I do hope deep inside that after intense rehabilitation, Mom can walk at all but it would be a dream come true if she could walk WITH me.

well...

i don't speak with my dad.

my grandpa just died 2 weeks ago and he was the one who was supposed to walk me down the aisle. it's what i've dreamed of since i was a little girl

so now it'll probably be my great uncle, who has health problems and may not even make it or my other uncle who i love dearly. i'm going to wait until april or so to ask either one.

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Posted by LaurenluvsTJ

Both parents. They are equally special to me, I want them both to be there with me.

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Same for me!

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Posted by smara

ahhh.. so grateful for this post - I can use some advice in this department. I was going to walk down with my sister and father.

To make a long story short.. my father abandoned me when I was younger and we just started building our relationship over the last several years. He promised to help me pay for a portion of the wedding w/o me asking and now is back pack peddling. I feel that this was his one chance to act like a father after not having him around for 17 yrs of my life and he didnt deliver. Is wrong of me to just have my sister walk me down, who had been through it all and have him sit on the sidelines.

Any advice will be helpful, a part of me feel lieks he's not worthy. Thanks a bunch - dont want to be a downer

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I can totally relate... well some of it. I'm having my adoptive dad (or so i call him) walk me down the isle. My father and i had a falling out (well i shouldn't say falling out because i just got tired of his ****) about 10 years ago and we don't speak. Well i got lucky and right around the time this happened, i started working at the age of 14. My boss (who i worked for for 10 years) pretty much stepped in as my dad. For the last 5 years that i worked for him, i moved into his house with his wife and kids because #1-i needed a place to stay and #2- on my off days, i took care of his kids. So he'll be walking me down the isle.

Recently, my father has become terminally ill. I have debated whether or not to work things out with him. The one thing in the back of my head was... he definitely would not be walking me down the isle, but would he be okay with sitting on the side lines? So i sort of know how you feel.

*My answer to your question is... don't have him walk you down the isle and i know it sounds harsh to some of you, but just because he is your biological father, doesn't mean he is your father in the way he should be. So i vote for your sister walking you down the isle. IMO

I will be walking down the isle with my god father.
My dad past away 3 years ago he would be proud to do that but i know he will be standing next to me....

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Posted by aliwnec10

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Posted by smara

ahhh.. so grateful for this post - I can use some advice in this department. I was going to walk down with my sister and father.

To make a long story short.. my father abandoned me when I was younger and we just started building our relationship over the last several years. He promised to help me pay for a portion of the wedding w/o me asking and now is back pack peddling. I feel that this was his one chance to act like a father after not having him around for 17 yrs of my life and he didnt deliver. Is wrong of me to just have my sister walk me down, who had been through it all and have him sit on the sidelines.

Any advice will be helpful, a part of me feel lieks he's not worthy. Thanks a bunch - dont want to be a downer

---

I can totally relate... well some of it. I'm having my adoptive dad (or so i call him) walk me down the isle. My father and i had a falling out (well i shouldn't say falling out because i just got tired of his ****) about 10 years ago and we don't speak. Well i got lucky and right around the time this happened, i started working at the age of 14. My boss (who i worked for for 10 years) pretty much stepped in as my dad. For the last 5 years that i worked for him, i moved into his house with his wife and kids because #1-i needed a place to stay and #2- on my off days, i took care of his kids. So he'll be walking me down the isle.

Recently, my father has become terminally ill. I have debated whether or not to work things out with him. The one thing in the back of my head was... he definitely would not be walking me down the isle, but would he be okay with sitting on the side lines? So i sort of know how you feel.

*My answer to your question is... don't have him walk you down the isle and i know it sounds harsh to some of you, but just because he is your biological father, doesn't mean he is your father in the way he should be. So i vote for your sister walking you down the isle. IMO

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Thanks alot for your advice.. it was very helpful - you are totally right. He's lucky he getting an invite

As for your father.. I think you should reconcile with him. You will feel better if you are the bigger person and it will ensure that you will have no regrets.

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Posted by smara

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Posted by aliwnec10

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Posted by smara

ahhh.. so grateful for this post - I can use some advice in this department. I was going to walk down with my sister and father.

To make a long story short.. my father abandoned me when I was younger and we just started building our relationship over the last several years. He promised to help me pay for a portion of the wedding w/o me asking and now is back pack peddling. I feel that this was his one chance to act like a father after not having him around for 17 yrs of my life and he didnt deliver. Is wrong of me to just have my sister walk me down, who had been through it all and have him sit on the sidelines.

Any advice will be helpful, a part of me feel lieks he's not worthy. Thanks a bunch - dont want to be a downer

---

I can totally relate... well some of it. I'm having my adoptive dad (or so i call him) walk me down the isle. My father and i had a falling out (well i shouldn't say falling out because i just got tired of his ****) about 10 years ago and we don't speak. Well i got lucky and right around the time this happened, i started working at the age of 14. My boss (who i worked for for 10 years) pretty much stepped in as my dad. For the last 5 years that i worked for him, i moved into his house with his wife and kids because #1-i needed a place to stay and #2- on my off days, i took care of his kids. So he'll be walking me down the isle.

Recently, my father has become terminally ill. I have debated whether or not to work things out with him. The one thing in the back of my head was... he definitely would not be walking me down the isle, but would he be okay with sitting on the side lines? So i sort of know how you feel.

*My answer to your question is... don't have him walk you down the isle and i know it sounds harsh to some of you, but just because he is your biological father, doesn't mean he is your father in the way he should be. So i vote for your sister walking you down the isle. IMO

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Thanks alot for your advice.. it was very helpful - you are totally right. He's lucky he getting an invite

As for your father.. I think you should reconcile with him. You will feel better if you are the bigger person and it will ensure that you will have no regrets.

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Well i'm glad i could help in some way.
But there will be no reconciling between us. There's just way too much bad history there and the man was just not meant to be a father. Besides, he was non-existant for 10 years and just because he's now sick doesn't change anything. Especially when he has no remorse for anything from the past. Do you know what i mean?

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Posted by aliwnec10

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Posted by smara

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Posted by aliwnec10

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Posted by smara

ahhh.. so grateful for this post - I can use some advice in this department. I was going to walk down with my sister and father.

To make a long story short.. my father abandoned me when I was younger and we just started building our relationship over the last several years. He promised to help me pay for a portion of the wedding w/o me asking and now is back pack peddling. I feel that this was his one chance to act like a father after not having him around for 17 yrs of my life and he didnt deliver. Is wrong of me to just have my sister walk me down, who had been through it all and have him sit on the sidelines.

Any advice will be helpful, a part of me feel lieks he's not worthy. Thanks a bunch - dont want to be a downer

---

I can totally relate... well some of it. I'm having my adoptive dad (or so i call him) walk me down the isle. My father and i had a falling out (well i shouldn't say falling out because i just got tired of his ****) about 10 years ago and we don't speak. Well i got lucky and right around the time this happened, i started working at the age of 14. My boss (who i worked for for 10 years) pretty much stepped in as my dad. For the last 5 years that i worked for him, i moved into his house with his wife and kids because #1-i needed a place to stay and #2- on my off days, i took care of his kids. So he'll be walking me down the isle.

Recently, my father has become terminally ill. I have debated whether or not to work things out with him. The one thing in the back of my head was... he definitely would not be walking me down the isle, but would he be okay with sitting on the side lines? So i sort of know how you feel.

*My answer to your question is... don't have him walk you down the isle and i know it sounds harsh to some of you, but just because he is your biological father, doesn't mean he is your father in the way he should be. So i vote for your sister walking you down the isle. IMO

---

Thanks alot for your advice.. it was very helpful - you are totally right. He's lucky he getting an invite

As for your father.. I think you should reconcile with him. You will feel better if you are the bigger person and it will ensure that you will have no regrets.

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Well i'm glad i could help in some way.
But there will be no reconciling between us. There's just way too much bad history there and the man was just not meant to be a father. Besides, he was non-existant for 10 years and just because he's now sick doesn't change anything. Especially when he has no remorse for anything from the past. Do you know what i mean?

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I know what you mean.. I was just saying you should reconcile so you can have a peace of mind. But it sounds like he doesnt deserve your time. Continue doing what you are doing and good things will come. As long as your happy thats what matters!!