Bar Mitzvah Etiquette

FH & I have never been to a Bar Mitzvah before, and we're going to his cousin's on Saturday. We're going to the ceremony at the temple, and then a party afterwards at a bowling alley.

Are there certain colors that are inappropriate to wear to Bar Mitzvahs? Black? White? Also we are going bowling afterwards...should I just wear a dress and bring socks to put on with the dress and bowling shoes? Or would a dress and leggings be appropriate for a Bar Mitzvah?

Also as far as gifts go, I've heard that traditionally, you're supposed to give multiples of 18. Is that correct? I just wanted to check. What's the appropriate amount to give then? Does $162 from the both of us sound right?

Any other etiqutte we should know about?

TIA!

Do you know what sect they are? If they are Reform you really can wear whatever (although I'd still keep it tasteful, like you were going to church).

If they are Conservative, I'd make sure your shoulders are covered.

If they are Orthodox you'll want to cover yourself up to your elbows and below your knees.



For the bowling I'd probably just wear leggings and bring socks.

I'd give $180 but that's just me...I like rounded #s haha.


ETA: If its Orthodox, you and FH will most likely be asked to sit apart...you with the women and he with the men.