So here it is. He's been out of work for about 2 weeks for an injury. I've continued to work my 2 jobs one during the day and waitressing at night. Now this week. Monday I had to work so he went and hung out with his friends and played cards. No biggie. Tuesday he had a meeting at the Fire Dept and he said he'd be over around 9. So I sat home and waited for him. He calls at 9 to tell me he's going out with his buddies instead. I got pissed naturally because I could have gone to hang out with my friends but instead I was waiting for him. Wednesday- I worked again and he went to a bar with his friends. No biggie. Thursday- I'm off but he has a wake (which should end around 9ish). It's 11:30 and still no phone call. He was out with his friends at a bar again.
Now. Can someone please tell me if I'm wrong in this situation. I'm pissed because he spent 4 nights in a row with his friends and made no time for me. He said that 'I just wanted to hang out with my friends' He thinks I'm wrong and I think he's wrong. I have no problem admitting I'm wrong when I really am. So please be totally honest in your answers.
jimmysgrl
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I don't think your wrong, honestly. Maybe ask him why he went out with his friends every night. Tell him you're resentful that you're working two jobs and he gets to go out and have fun and not make time for you. Did his friends just come into town? Is it a special circumstance?
civic24ex
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If I were you I would be angry as well. Your out working two jobs and he is out drinking with his buddys. What makes it worse is that he said he would call and he didnt. A simple call to tell you what ws going on is all that was needed. Then you could have gotten in touch with your own friends to make plans. I have been in this situation before and dh thought I was wrong as well. Hope everything works out for you.
QueensBride
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You have every right to be annoyed.
jpavig
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Posted by jimmysgrl
I don't think your wrong, honestly. Maybe ask him why he went out with his friends every night. Tell him you're resentful that you're working two jobs and he gets to go out and have fun and not make time for you. Did his friends just come into town? Is it a special circumstance?
Well the meeting on Tuesday I understand but I was expecting him afterwards. And last night I was just upset that I didn't get a phone call. I know I'm probably making a bigger deal of this than I should but I was upset and wanted to see if I had any justification.
KimberlyBride
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You are not wrong at all. He needs to make time for you. You shoule be #1 in his life now.
Borricuamorena0905
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He's wrong. He's not be considerate of you!.. one or two days ok, but he's stretching it alil.. Speak ur mind, Communicate, tell him how u feel!
VS11
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I would want answers at to why all of a sudden he is hanging out with friends at a bar 4 nights a week,,,and where did he go after the wake Thursday night???? and why didnt he call u??? Evry guy needs to be with there friends and I dont give my FH any problems about that.....
If this behavior is out of the norm, then you have every right to question him and be upset..I dont know how your relationship is...
If that was my FH, I would be upset since that behavior would be out of his norm,,,ya know?
VS11
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dont let him turn this around on you..
naps627
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I don't think you are wrong at all. I would be really pissed.
May05Bride
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Does he do this all the time? or is he doing this just this couple of weeks while he is out of work?
I think that makes a difference. Maybe, he finally got a chance to hang out with them, so he took the opportunity - since he is able to. If thats the case, I think you are both right!
MrsA814
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You are not wrong at all. I would be very pissed off about that to. Sorry that you are going through this
SomethingBlu
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Posted by jpavig
Thursday- I'm off but he has a wake (which should end around 9ish). It's 11:30 and still no phone call. He was out with his friends at a bar again.
Was this a FD wake? It could be that he's stressed or depressed about losing a friend and hanging out with his friends takes his mind off it. It's a lot of hanging out for one week and if it's out of character for him I would let him know that it's a bit much and that he can't expect to do that everynight, but also understand that he probably wants to relax and maybe doesn't want to be around you and make you all depressed. Guys deal with their stress so weirdly.
You do have a right to be upset though, you're working so hard and just want to be appreciated...yu sound level headed and mature, just talk to him and get the whole scoop.
Best wishes!
Butterflybride
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I don't think you're wrong. It's one thing to want to hang out with his friends, but he should be able to give you time as well. He should be able to alternate. You were patient the first few days and quite honestly most men in relationships would not be so lucky...JMO
jpavig
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Posted by SomethingBlu
Posted by jpavig
Thursday- I'm off but he has a wake (which should end around 9ish). It's 11:30 and still no phone call. He was out with his friends at a bar again.
Was this a FD wake? It could be that he's stressed or depressed about losing a friend and hanging out with his friends takes his mind off it. It's a lot of hanging out for one week and if it's out of character for him I would let him know that it's a bit much and that he can't expect to do that everynight, but also understand that he probably wants to relax and maybe doesn't want to be around you and make you all depressed. Guys deal with their stress so weirdly.
You do have a right to be upset though, you're working so hard and just want to be appreciated...yu sound level headed and mature, just talk to him and get the whole scoop.
Best wishes!
Thanks. It is out of the norm and I guess he is taking advantage of having off for the past few weeks. I'm just not used to him being away from me like this. It's one thing when we're working and stuff but we were both off. I'll get over it, we'll talk about it and make up. Thanks for your help girls.!
Jamie&MarkSept.'05
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I would be pissed and believe me...FH would hear about it....
He once decided to have his friends over at our week for almost an entire weekend (instead of the one night he told me they would be there) and after I finished telling him what I thought of that....well I bet he will never do that again!!!
Give it to him!!!
buckles
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I don't think you are wrong at all. Talk to him. Let him know exactly why it is effecting you like this (sometimes men have no clue why we get so anry sometimes) so he knows what not to do next time.
jpavig
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Still haven't been able to sit and talk to FH. He's still in Brookly helping out his aunt. I hate waiting so long to settle a fight.
suezboss
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I dont think you're wrong! that is not right for him not to make time for you! you both seem to have very busy schedules, but you made plans twice to hang out after whatever you werre doing, and both times he didn't come over, but called to say he was goign out, or already out!
I would be Pissed too!!!
You are in the right!
jpavig
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Posted by suezboss
I dont think you're wrong! that is not right for him not to make time for you! you both seem to have very busy schedules, but you made plans twice to hang out after whatever you werre doing, and both times he didn't come over, but called to say he was goign out, or already out!
I would be Pissed too!!!
You are in the right!
I guess we're both having a pretty crappy day huh.
